To refuse to let my MIL bring her own kettle when she visits?

[BiscuitHammer]

Bit of a silly one maybe but it’s causing actual rows so here goes.

MIL is coming to stay for the weekend (joy) and she’s announced she’s bringing her own kettle because apparently ours “tastes funny”. I genuinely don’t know what that even means?? It’s just a normal Breville one from Argos. She says she can “taste the plastic” and it “ruins tea” which is ridiculous because we’ve had it over a year and no one else has ever complained.

I told her she’s being dramatic and she got in a strop. DH is now saying I should just let her bring it to keep the peace but I think it’s rude. Like sorry but turning up at someone’s house with your own appliances is a bit much isn’t it? What next, her own toaster? Portable shower?

I get she’s particular about tea (she only drinks loose leaf and swears PG Tips gives her headaches) but still. We’re not a bloody hotel.

AIBU to put my foot down and tell her to use ours or not bother?

(For context she also once brought her own pillow and sugar. Make of that what you will.)

I agree with the mil. I can taste it when a plastic kettle has been used. Stainless steel.interior essential

I.make my tea from bottled water in the microwave at one house i visit. Their water is gross , and the kettle has floaters.

Just let her bring it. It won't make any difference to you so it's really not worth arguing about.

Someone hates their MiL, and it shows. Yeah bringing her kettle is bonkers but you could just go "Haha you crack me up Sharon you daft bat, bring your kettle if you like"

This is not about the kettle it is about control of the domestic life of your household. She is wanting to assert her authority, you want to assert yours. Recognise this and let it go. It’s just a kettle.

I agree, it's a small thing in the big scheme and won't hurt you.

I've known people prefer their own pillow, even take them on holiday, not a big deal.

Does it really matter?!

Putting the foot down seems a bit strong over a kettle! I kind of get it, I like our kettle here and tea never tastes as good but of course that could be a number of factors and while I love tea it’s not a big enough deal to me!!

I can understand taking your own mugs to hotels. Sometimes the mugs in the rooms are too small or too thick or have uncomfortable handles. I like tea in a very thin white bone china mug but coffee has to be in something chunkier.

Just let her get on with it. My mother in law once brought her own bed linen! That was rude, but I just grinned and bore it and didn't tell her how offended I was.

Let her get on with it 🤷‍♀️ she’s your guest, be polite.

I take my own pillow sometimes because too many people seem to have ridiculous great puffy hard bolsters in their spare bedrooms and I often sleep on my stomach.

Not worth getting annoyed about. Ignore it.

I always carry a couple green teas I like and some packets of brown sugar and hot sauce and breakfast salsa. I have a travel pillow that's comfy.

My grandmother used to take an enamel covered mug everywhere.

Eccentric but perfectly fine to do and doesn’t put you out whatsoever.

I would take my pillow to MIL's before she died. Never enough non feather ones at her house and I preferred not having a 3 day tension headache on top of everything else. We would also take kitchen knives if I was cooking as I wanted one that I knew was sharp to preserve my fingers.
But if she wants to lug her own kettle, where's the problem really? You therefore cannot be responsible for making her a cup of anything. WIN

Why do some people on here get so het up about the smallest of things? If she wants to bring her kettle, let her. God forbid you should have any eccentricities when you’re older!

I suspect there’s more to this than a funny tasting cuppa and a pillow, and that you don’t have the strongest relationship generally.

Why are you hosting her if you cant stand her?
Either be a gracious hostess and let her bring whatever comforts she wants or tell her she can get a hotel.

Let her bring the kettle. Offer her a cuppa. Use your own kettle if she can't see you making it.
Feel smug.
She's a loon...

YANBU. I agree that I would let it go, but she sounds very annoying. Is there a reason that she has to stay with you and not in a hotel?

It's obvious that OP's MIL is not a welcome guest and has probably invited herself so the additional fussiness is even more galling.

I take my own mug to hotels, holiday, conferences. I just like the shape of it and it never feels right drinking from anything else. I don't take it other people's houses though, in case they realise think I'm weird... 😳

I've done this since my late 20s, so not an 'old lady' thing!

To the people saying 'it's not a big deal', it is rude to suggest that hosting is inadequate, and weird to bring your own appliances. MIL should either go without tea for a couple of days or keep her mouth shut. I'm not saying that the OP shouldn't accommodate her (anything for a quiet life!) but she's not BU to feel put out.

I know it's your house, but do you actually believe you have the right to tell people not to bring something of their own that makes them more comfortable?! That's just as crazy, OP! 😬

YABU!

I don’t blame her if you actually do have a kettle made of plastic, I think water boiled in them tastes horrible and only use metal ones myself. In any case is it really such a big deal for her to bring it?

Let her do it, she can make all the brews for everyone.
My MIL insists that tea made in a stainless steel teapot is inferior. Also, China mugs are the only good choice. Have I ever had a decent cuppa at her house?
No. 🙊