For those who were beautiful, how do you deal with age?

[pinkglitter12]

It happens to all of us I know. But how are some people so accepting and so graceful getting older?
Each time i look in the mirror something is lower than It was before.
This time its my my eyebrows. I waxed the ends so they no longer drag down my face but how do people fight this unbeatable battle and inevitable death?
How do people accept that they are no longer beautiful?

ummm its telly! they round up all the ugly ones and hide em till the cameras are gone.

Exactly!

Agree, met an 85 year old friend of a friend at the weekend. She had just been paddle boarding and met us for a sea swim. She was vibrant, sunkissed, weather beaten and had long greying wild hair and exuded a love of life. Beautiful and inspiring woman. Like some mythical goddess.

@Middlechild3 this is the image of how I want to be at 85! But on a tennis court. Moving and living and laughing. What do a few wrinkles matter at that age if you're living life to the full?

The problem is it’s normalised to try to negate any signs of ageing or at least neutralise them by the media/entertainment/music/industry. So Jennifer Aniston & Gwynneth Paltrow are seen as almost ageless when in fact they’re having routine cosmetic treatments, surgery, fillers etc. And even then don’t look natural or quite right. I wish it was acceptable to just age. Without the gracefully. Men don’t have to age gracefully. Only women where to age equals to become a crazed old hag. We see ageing as some kind of moral weakness & that we’ve been lax about letting our appearance go when we have no real control over it. The beauty industry is to obvs where the major blame lies too. Just be you & celebrate & focus on other things. Looks and appearance really are just skin deep.

Mind you I would like to have my neck done. It looks like a tortoise 😂

In that case, it's understandable and I apologise for being judgemental.

Noooo. These are shows where people are gardening or doing up houses. All lovely - all with immaculate hair even when laying patios.

Are you going to post a photo @pinkglitter12 so that we can see how many leagues above us you are in the beauty department🦄

even easier in that case, they only choose the beautiful ones in the first place.

Christ what a depressing post!
54 here, no hair, lashes or brows , thanks to chemotherapy. Face lines due to worry about my cancer. I guess I’m done for OP?

And you’re bloody lucky to have eyebrows!!!

Friend had chemotherapy. She used to moan about her thin and lank hair. All fell out. It grew back thick, wild and curly as did other bits.

My mum was also beautiful in her youth, but chemo took its toll on her physical appearance. The grace she showed throughout is one of the reasons I dont mind getting older - she set a good example of how to appreciate every wrinkle.

I watched an aunt fight cancer twice. I visited the day before she died. She'd lost her husband, her only son at 21. She was awake, alert, couldn't speak but her blue eyes were bright, she had an inner glow I can't describe adequately I put her sons graduation photo next to her, spoke of him. She smiled. She suddenly took a turn, I called out for the nurse leaving the room, sat on the stairs and wept. That day she looked beautiful to me.

Hmm, I think beautiful people maintain their looks for the most part. They started off with good bone structure, and symmetrical features. Those things don't change, just the outer layer of skin wrinkles and sags a bit. Perhaps they were so used to seeing perfection in the mirror that they find fault more easily, but most others will agree that they are still very attractive, just mature.

Take Halle Berry or Charlize Theron. Both classic beauties in their youth, and still beautiful at their current age. Both can afford the best of skincare and 'tweaks', but neither are overdone.

I’m not going to claim to be beautiful. I did get my fair share of attention from the lads when I was younger, but maybe they were all pissed.

One thing I do know for certain, however, is that getting older is a privilege, and one which is denied to many people. My childhood best friend was killed in a car crash caused by a drunk driver when she was 22.

If you’re beautiful when you’re young you’ll be beautiful as you age.

I think that you have thought all your life that you are valued because you are beautiful. You need to realise that you are valued because of who you are. Looks are truly unimportant and this is an exciting time to really find out who you are and your place in the world. Forget trying to maintain your looks. Stay healthy, be fit. Don’t chase male validation. Nourish your mind. Go on a journey (spiritually!) and really enjoy this wonderful life stage. We are so lucky to be alive and if we have love in our lives (and children), just focus on appreciating the joy of being alive.

The trick is to be an interesting person who has more to think about and talk to their friends about than make up and clothes and the body they put them on. I personally don’t give two hoots about ‘beauty’. I like clothes and like a nice hair style- for me but other than that I prefer to think about my interests and interactions with friends.

Surely your perspective changes as you age it’s concerning if it doesn’t. Pining over not being a 21 year old hottie anymore at 50 is rather embarrassing.

I feel grateful I was good looking when young it was fun but had downsides too. That life stage is over now and that fact needs to be accepted. Stay fit and eat well and treasure and appreciate every moment.

Funny thing is, when I look back at photos of me when I was young, I looked bloody amazing, but I had no confidence really. Worried about stupid shit and how I looked all the time.

Now I have wrinkles, and bits are getting less and less firm by the year…but I don’t really care, I have confidence now in things that have nothing to do with beauty or youth, and I wouldn’t swap it!
I still try and make the most of what I’ve got, and look after myself, but honestly, I’m quite enjoying aging! I’d hate to be 25 again even with no wrinkles and a firm arse!

Got to say the OP made me laugh with “every time I look in the mirror something is lower than it was before”.

As a young woman (I’ll be 60 next year) I had a terrible self image and saw myself as ugly,

As I’ve aged I actually feel more confident in myself and my looks.

I have never fit the movie star/magazine ideal of beautiful but I don’t think I’m ugly anymore. In fact I feel quite confident in my looks.

Why it’s taken decades for me to achieve this confidence is a whole other question

Beauty is very subjective however I’m from a family where the women have made a living from being beautiful. There has been a ballet dancer, actor and four of us have been models. The ballet dancer and actor did obviously require talent and whilst the ballet dancer was never famous she did perform on stage professionally, the actor has had recognition and whilst not super famous is known. For myself as one of the older members of the family at 60 how do I find ageing?

On the daily I do not especially think of it but very occasionally I catch a glimpse and can see the signs and miss youth a little. One of my relatives has had a lot of cosmetic surgery done to try and stop the signs. She is a very similar age to me and does look younger. But overall I’m just glad I’m still alive, a woman in my family died tragically very young in her 20’s, she would be in her forties now so I do think of ageing as a privilege.

It helped give me a lot of confidence, people have generally always been nice to me and whilst the concept of pretty privilege was something I only heard of a few years ago it has helped me in all areas of my life.

Yes. Surely as you have done you shift mindset and feel pleased you had it in the first place rather than clinging onto it. There are downsides to it as well that I don’t miss. Interactions with men are much easier now.

Dd2 is beautiful it brings huge benefits but she has had to deal with jealousy from other insecure girls, their mothers and even teachers. Honestly I would not have believed it if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes.

If she has a teenage problem other girls get sympathy from adults but with dd2 some other adults have actually scoffed. The attitude is she’s so lucky what does she have to complain about? Found it quite a shocking response to a young girl with a diagnosed medical issue.