AIBU to be disappointed about this?

[mrsm43s]

Later this week, on my birthday, we're doing a long train journey to visit friends for a few days. Whenever we do these long journeys, we always book them over lunchtime, and do a "train picnic" of nice food e.g afternoon tea style and share some prosecco or anti pasta style and share some red. It means that our trip starts when we get in the train, and the journey flies by.

DH booked the train tickets, and he just accepted the default seating rather than selecting seats, and as a consequence we're stuck on a middle and aisle seat with no table. So lunch is pretty much going to be a sarnie and a bottle of water as there's no table space, the journey is going to be long, boring and uncomfortable, squashed in next to a stranger.

We've tried to change seats now, but as it's a couple of days away, there's no availability of seats at a table, and no availability in first class either.

I feel like instead of my birthday starting at 11.30am once we're on the train, it's not going to start until 3pm when we arrive, and the journey is something to be tolerated, rather than something to be enjoyed.

I don't want to be spoilt, and I get that I'm going to have a lovely time with my friends, but I'm really grumpy and disappointed. I think it's mostly because DH has form for this kind of stuff, always taking the quick, easy way, and never checking anything.

AIBU to be pissed off? And does anyone have any ideas of how to make the journey more fun, or special/treat lunch ideas possible to eat when sitting in a cramped middle seat?

I really can't understand what @Morgenrot25 is going on about.....but I do really fancy a nice M+S picnic platter to eat right now 😋

You've gone down a weird rabbit hole, it seems. Train companies don't actually care what people do, as long as you give them your money and you aren't being majorly disruptive, however I imagine they'd prefer customers actually bought their food and maybe even visited their dining car (should one exist). They probably also hope folk have some consideration for other passengers.

@Morgenrot25 there are plenty of rules regarding feet on seats, not blocking aisles, using headphones. They clearly disagree with you that laying out some food in a booked table is anti social and inconsiderate.

The food seems to have become a real distraction on this thread. But the actual issue is your husband being thoughtless and having a can't-be-arsed attitude.

It’s one of my favourite things about Mumsnet! OP: “My husband pulled out his todger and pissed all over our anniversary roast dinner, ruining the cauli cheese. AIBU to be upset?” Mumsnet: 40 pages of debate over whether cauliflower cheese belongs on a roast, was there gravy, it’s not a difficult meal to make, ugh you abbreviated cauliflower cheese, what no Yorkshire puddings? Etc

I’m on a train now.
I’ve just cracked open a bag of humbugs.

I really don't understand long term couples who don't just stick to what they are good at.

My DH has many amazing talents, gardening, all the DIY, plumbing etc and many things I would be absolutely shit at and cut corners for sure. Whilst I too have many talents like cooking, admin, diary organising.

This might sound a bit wild but we stick to what we are good at. Why oh why would I get DH to plan a holiday when I know it's something that he'd be rubbish at and get stressed about? Equally, why would I grout the bathroom tiles when I would make a hash of it?

I think some people read too many novels and think that a romanticised life is achievable where partners book wonderful picnics and events with no trouble or drama. The problem is some people have so many ideas and romantic notions in their head that it's really hard for the other partner to 'see' that or understand the importance of it. Even if it is your birthday or an event - if you know your DH has form why put yourself through the agony?? Life is not a novel.

Train companies do care what people do and put rules in place to stop them being anti-social. London Underground bans hot food. Your Scotrail services ban alcohol. There are quiet carriages and "current railway byelaws already ban many forms of anti-social behaviour on trains and at stations, including using equipment to produce sound without permission if this annoys others" according to this: www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cly5g7v2qddo

But as the OP isn't being majorly disruptive and does have some consideration for her fellow passengers by not encroaching on their table space, we're all good.

I have no medical issues, but would eat my lunch whenever I bloody well wanted. Ignore that moaning minnie, who has no idea whether someone travelling on a train needs to eat for medical reasons, hunger reasons (usually a pretty good reason to eat) or just because they want to!

Presumably their also going round aeroplanes telling people to put the food served away 🙄

Food noise doesn't bother most people. Nor do food smells. You know, it's just that stuff that we eat three times a day to live. You seem to be making an awful lot of fuss about it to have felt the need to have consistently argued for 22 pages of a thread about this. Are you ok?? It comes across like this is deeply affecting you IRL.

@MasterBeth I didn't know about no hot food on the London Underground.
I've eaten a McDonald's on there several million times......

I'm not sure you csn conclude anything regarding what a train company might think. Nice try though.

I also don’t agree HTH!

Incidentally, this is the food being served on the train. Fish, curry, hot cheese etc. I can't see how people can see that's acceptable, but baulk at a few M&S deli items as being "performative" and "anti social"

Asking someone if they're ok is completely pasdive aggressive high school bully behaviour.
Apparently having an opinion and expressing it makes one not ok, who knew. 😵‍💫

I’ve been on Northern trains that have 3 seats on one side and 2 on the other

As much as I think the OP sounds a little food obsessed and would be better off taking a meal deal and a good book, rather than a performative banquet, I'm laughing at all the 'chewing, gulping, chomping, slurping and guzzling', that would apparently be heard over the noise of the train 🤣

Meal times at some MNetter's houses must be like feeding time at the zoo!

@mrsm43s I can't quite read the menu on your photo but is one of the options a "grazing box" ?
So basically exactly the same as your M+S food?? 😂😂
This thread has gone very strange.
Enjoy your train journey the best you can and most important enjoy your food 😋

Nope, it doesn't help. HTH.

Anyway @mrsm43s I'm bowing out now, happy birthday when it comes!

Looks deliciously smelly!!

Enjoy it!!

I'm seeing a different set of menus on LNER tbh, I wonder if that's actually the buffet car menu? It would probably be more elaborate?
Who knows?

😂😂😂 Pissy cauliflower cheese

And don't forget "how can you bear to eat a roast dinner at 6pm, everyone knows its a lunchtime meal. I would have indigestion having such a heavy meal in the evening."

I think OP might actually be better treating herself to an actual meal, in the buffet car if there is one.

Agreed! They don’t seem to use plates either!

Eh?
How have you drawn that conclusion exactly?

Op mentioned her husband, why are you making assumptions that I have a husband?