AIBU to be disappointed about this?

[mrsm43s]

Later this week, on my birthday, we're doing a long train journey to visit friends for a few days. Whenever we do these long journeys, we always book them over lunchtime, and do a "train picnic" of nice food e.g afternoon tea style and share some prosecco or anti pasta style and share some red. It means that our trip starts when we get in the train, and the journey flies by.

DH booked the train tickets, and he just accepted the default seating rather than selecting seats, and as a consequence we're stuck on a middle and aisle seat with no table. So lunch is pretty much going to be a sarnie and a bottle of water as there's no table space, the journey is going to be long, boring and uncomfortable, squashed in next to a stranger.

We've tried to change seats now, but as it's a couple of days away, there's no availability of seats at a table, and no availability in first class either.

I feel like instead of my birthday starting at 11.30am once we're on the train, it's not going to start until 3pm when we arrive, and the journey is something to be tolerated, rather than something to be enjoyed.

I don't want to be spoilt, and I get that I'm going to have a lovely time with my friends, but I'm really grumpy and disappointed. I think it's mostly because DH has form for this kind of stuff, always taking the quick, easy way, and never checking anything.

AIBU to be pissed off? And does anyone have any ideas of how to make the journey more fun, or special/treat lunch ideas possible to eat when sitting in a cramped middle seat?

The noise, the space taken up. People doing this don’t realise how noisy and how much space they take up when they’re in a group, particularly after alcohol.

i actively avoid table seats when I book rail travel (I travel a lot) having had my computer spilt on, mess left by “charming” yummy mummies with their PFBs, and couples thinking they can squash me into a corner looking resentfully at my laptop in “their” table.

Can we just look more closely at “table picnic”. If I set out my meal deal of a drink, a pot of carrots with hummus and a sandwich in front of me, on a table, and my friend does too. That’s ok. But if instead of a pot of carrots and hummus I have some ham, and instead of my friend having theirs they have a pot of olives. Is this ok???

Oh fgs! Pay no attention to the miseries with their knickers in a twist op, enjoy your train picnic/birthday!🍾

I don't think there's an absolute correct in this either, but I'm not the one telling people to 'get a grip' or whatever else.
People have also read 'don't have a picnic' as 'don't eat at all', when that's not the case, or have misinterpreted comments which were a response to another comments (and need to be taken in context of that). I do think OP is overreacting regarding the table scenario, but she does also seem annoyed at her partners lack of organisational skills in general.

this is hilarious.

if you cover ‘your’ half of the table with your quite substantial picnic, what happens if the train breaks suddenly/goes round a sharp bend?

have visions of the food and Prosecco flying all over the place.

bet your dh hates it and desperately wants to eat on the dropdown tables instead.

Oh not another I am so precious post !

Oh FGS, pay no attention to adults who call others 'miseries' for having an opinion. 🫣

😂😂😂

Sitting your own small amount of food in front of you isn't the same as setting out a big sharing picnic, that's fairly obvious.

I presume If the train brakes, it would spill? As wound tea, coffee, water etc.

The trains on long journeys are however built for a smooth ride, without sharp bends,

They serve hot drinks in these trains, that’s more of an issue with burns etc, so they’re set up for it. I’d rather Prosecco than scalding coffee!

@Morgenrot25 you aren't telling her to get a grip no, you and others are telling her what she can and can't eat in public. What is deemed "acceptable" to you. I'm glad you said you avoid train table seats .I think that's the exactly right solution. If someone doing something perfectly normal bothers you, the onus is on you to not put yourself in the way if it a d then everyone is happy.

Thanks for your input.

The items in a meal deal for two people could add up to 6-8 different things. About the same as the OP describes. She also said they might not get it all out at once.

Where do you stand on someone offering their train companion a crisp out of their packet? Does that constitute a crossover from meal deal (acceptable) to picnic (burn the witch)?

Thinking about it, the smaller tables may be the better option for eating/drinking, as spills will be more restricted to the people actually consuming? Agree that many of the long distance trains are quite a smooth ride, unless they have to suddenly brake, though.

Pack your little picnic in a small basket along with cloth napkins. Eating off your knee will be fine. Use the pull down tables for glasses of wine.
Next time DH books give him a written check list for ease of booking something you find acceptable.

Maybe it’s confusion over the term picnic.

for me a picnic is a leisurely affair, food is spread out across (their half 🙄 of the) table; wine is opened, there is presumably some type of vessel for drinking from. You eat a bit chat a bit, “graze” if you will.

it takes time. And I think that is what is objectionable. At least with a sandwich, it’s open eaten, rubbish binned. most people can cope with any type of disruption for a small amount of time. But a long period of watching people chew on chorizo and the accompanying slipping and sliding of bottles/pots/platters every time the train corners would irritate me.

Meal deals are generally a one main, one drink, one 'snack:', aren't they?

Hallelujah.
Yes, to all of this. 😬😬😬

Taking over the table, getting pissed…

Oh yes. I can feel the rage rising

You know ow how filthy those tables are don't you. Bet they've never been cleaned.

Don’t be ridiculous!

Im sure OP can manage to not lick them and also have a wipe to wipe them down! I presume she’s drinking out of a container, eating from a plate or napkin and not directly from the table.

Let it go OP. Imagine you make a huge fuss and make him “suffer for his incompetence”. What does punishing him achieve? He’s unlikely to change.

If he drops dead of a heart attack before your next birthday, you’ll be glad you made little bento boxes and made the best of what could be a lovely little trip, and didn’t get yourself all het up over something so trivial.

Oh wise up. She is hardly bringing on a picnic basket. It sounds like a few picky bit picks. The train will have loads of people eating and drinking on it. OP will not be an exception.