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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it really is a man's world?

303 replies

TreatTreat · 04/07/2025 16:22

We all know it is, but itv1 confirmed it even more for me today by calling the Euros tournament the 'women's euro tournament'. TV stations sure as hell don't introduce men's tournaments with their gender in the introduction.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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Tidekiln · 07/07/2025 08:10

RosesAndHellebores · 07/07/2025 07:25

I usually put Hi Fianance Team (or whatever the department is).

I hope whoever sent emails to Dear Sir or Madam, ended them with Yours faithfully. Had they ended them differently, that would have annoyed me more.

If your just writing a letter to a company and not a specific department what do you put? Like a firm of solicitors for example

Wheezygonzalez · 07/07/2025 08:11

JohnTheRevelator · 04/07/2025 17:37

This is absolutely true. Indeed there was an article in a newspaper about a year ago how everything from mobile phones,to stab vests,crash test dummies,drugs,and office temperatures are designed for men. Presumably by men. Men are the 'default' human being.

They got this from the book Invisible Women

RosesAndHellebores · 07/07/2025 08:16

Tidekiln · 07/07/2025 08:10

If your just writing a letter to a company and not a specific department what do you put? Like a firm of solicitors for example

I'd know which individual were dealing with my affairs at a solicitors. Or, I'd address it to the appropriate team: Dear Conveyancing Team, for example.

Tidekiln · 07/07/2025 08:27

RosesAndHellebores · 07/07/2025 08:16

I'd know which individual were dealing with my affairs at a solicitors. Or, I'd address it to the appropriate team: Dear Conveyancing Team, for example.

Ok I worked in admin in a solicitors office for years and we always wrote to other firms as Dear Sirs, it was just old fashioned tradition I guess. I just wondered what the modern way was if people get annoyed now at dear sirs.

tripleginandtonic · 07/07/2025 08:38

Tidekiln · 07/07/2025 06:59

What is the correct word to put after Dear?

At school I was taught Dear Sir/Madam

DelphiniumBlue · 07/07/2025 13:37

It is a man's world. Hence the poignancy of the thread about time off after miscarriage, comments about the length of the pregnancy, about whether and how the woman's sick record might be affected, which has knock-on effects on staff retention, employability and promotion. Men don't have to deal with that shit.
It's bad enough having to go through a miscarriage, both emotionally and physically ( took me 2 months and several hospital visits to stop bleeding), without having to soldier on at work pretending everything is OK, because you are worried about being taken seriously in your career, or worse, losing your job. Most of us do not take time off unless we have to, but working while passing clots of blood, feeling on the verge of collapse/fainting is not only unpleasant but unsafe. Men don't have to deal with that shit.
Obviously there's loads of other ways in which women are hard done by, that's just the one that's on my mind right now.

SprayWhiteDung · 07/07/2025 13:56

See also 'x years since England have won y' when the women's team won it last year!

I'm not actually any kind of football fan, but I thought it was brilliant a few years ago when Baddiel & Skinner and The Lightning Seeds sang Three Lions on the Royal Variety Performance (or similar kind of programme).

They sang (I forget the actual timings), but something like "56 years of hurt - for the men's team" and then, the next time around, "14 weeks of hurt - for the women's team" with a big wink from Frank. I loved the idea of it being 'hurt' - when you'd won the last tournament, a few weeks previously, and there obviously hadn't been another one to win or lose yet!

SerafinasGoose · 07/07/2025 13:58

TheDogsMother · 04/07/2025 18:49

Even these days ?? That is so frustrating and sad in equal measure.

Compare, in terms of the disparity in status, 'Miss' vs. 'Sir'.

High time British schools got with the programme.

StrawberrySquash · 07/07/2025 17:22

I am bemused that anyone doesn't write Dear Sir or Madam. I was taught that in the 80s!

PeapodMcgee · 07/07/2025 17:27

SerafinasGoose · 07/07/2025 13:58

Compare, in terms of the disparity in status, 'Miss' vs. 'Sir'.

High time British schools got with the programme.

Our school is 'Sir' and 'Ma'am'.

I'd prefer 'Dave' and 'Janey' but I'm.an old hippy 😂

WifeOfTiresias · 07/07/2025 19:33

pharmer · 07/07/2025 00:51

As far as I know it is because whilst the women's game is for women only, what we think of as the 'men's team' is technically open, and if a woman was good enough she could play on it. it's just that they don't have the physical advantage men do so that would never happen

I believe that the FA actually ban girls from playing with the boys after a certain age so, no, the men’s team is not technically open and no woman could ever play on an adult mens team even if she could run rings round them. As football is a contact sport, safety is the reason.

TreatTreat · 08/07/2025 01:35

SerafinasGoose · 07/07/2025 13:58

Compare, in terms of the disparity in status, 'Miss' vs. 'Sir'.

High time British schools got with the programme.

Yes, I've never thought of that but it's so true! Why don't they call male teachers 'mister' instead of sir so it's on a level with what the female teachers are addressed as?

OP posts:
HedgehogOnTheBike · 08/07/2025 01:40

...it took football match intro inequality for you to realise it's a man's world? Oh sweet summer child...

TreatTreat · 08/07/2025 01:44

HedgehogOnTheBike · 08/07/2025 01:40

...it took football match intro inequality for you to realise it's a man's world? Oh sweet summer child...

Of course not, but the football urged me to write a thread. Your post has an edge of being a bit up yourself.

OP posts:
Flashout · 08/07/2025 01:46

Courtesy of the FB group “the man who has it all”

To think it really is a man's world?
Flashout · 08/07/2025 01:48

Ta dahhh

www.facebook.com/share/1A3cXod38c/?mibextid=wwXIfr

HedgehogOnTheBike · 08/07/2025 01:49

TreatTreat · 08/07/2025 01:44

Of course not, but the football urged me to write a thread. Your post has an edge of being a bit up yourself.

I promise I'm not up myself. I'm mostly down on myself.

TreatTreat · 08/07/2025 01:52

HedgehogOnTheBike · 08/07/2025 01:49

I promise I'm not up myself. I'm mostly down on myself.

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you're OK ❤️

OP posts:
HedgehogOnTheBike · 08/07/2025 01:53

TreatTreat · 08/07/2025 01:52

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you're OK ❤️

I'm one day at a time.

It is a man's world.

Hopefully one day an equal one.

LeatherJacketWedding · 08/07/2025 02:01

Tidekiln · 07/07/2025 08:10

If your just writing a letter to a company and not a specific department what do you put? Like a firm of solicitors for example

Then you write ‘to whomever it may concern’

Stingofthelash · 08/07/2025 02:24

PeppyRedStork · 04/07/2025 17:45

Of course it is, but I think there's definitely improvement, especially with womens' sport. A few years ago, we'd not even be hearing about the various tournaments.

And I have noticed a tendency to say "men's world cup" etc over the past couple years. It's definitely improving. In fact, I was really pleased at first and now I'm just fed up I'm being forced to watch twice as much football by DH 😂

As an American, living in the UK I would often get "Americans are shit at football" from men who feel the need to say something when they hear my accent down the pub. I'd reply that while the men were shit, the women were the best in the world thank you very much.

They'd usually reply, "but that's just women though, they'd not beat the men"🙄 Funny the way gold medals count when women get them but World Cups don't?

Were the team who won the World Cup the same team who were beaten by an under 15s boys team? Or am I confusing them with the Matildas who lost 7-0 to an under 16s boys team?

Isitreallysohard · 08/07/2025 02:30

It's a white man's world. YANBU* *

ThatDaringEagle · 08/07/2025 02:51

TreatTreat · 04/07/2025 16:22

We all know it is, but itv1 confirmed it even more for me today by calling the Euros tournament the 'women's euro tournament'. TV stations sure as hell don't introduce men's tournaments with their gender in the introduction.

Do "we all know it is" really?

This post & thread reek of victim hood & some women's weapons grade preciousness tbh.

If it really is such a man's world , perhaps you could tell me why?

  • most ads are aimed at women
  • there's widespread & woeful depiction & mocking of men & being male in advertising
  • car insurance is cheaper for women , surely a government agency or department can recognise this as clear sexual discrimination!? And rectify it??
  • the amount spent on women's health (excluding childbirth) clearly far exceeds men's health, just walk into any GP surgery and compare the number of women versus men accessing healthcare, yet every other thread on here seems to try to state otherwise. That's total feminist BS!!
  • family law is still very much biased towards favouring the woman (financially, retention of family home & access to the children) over & at the direct expense of the man in question

Many women these days seem to want equal or preferential access to job opportunities, careers, etc while also being busy mothers, they still want doors held for them & seats offered to them etc, yet they want to consider themselves 'equal' as well. it's like they wish to retain the perks of chivalry & the traditional patriarchal protection of women, while also wanting equal pay, opportunity , etc, etc, etc These positions are incompatible, but very few enlightened feminists can see beyond their sense of victimhood to realise that things like positive discrimination, bigger spending on healthcare for women and most consumer spending being centered around women consumers are indicators that it really is far from the man's world posters around here would try to convince you it is.

That's just total bollocks these days!!!

LoveItaly · 08/07/2025 03:09

ThatDaringEagle · 08/07/2025 02:51

Do "we all know it is" really?

This post & thread reek of victim hood & some women's weapons grade preciousness tbh.

If it really is such a man's world , perhaps you could tell me why?

  • most ads are aimed at women
  • there's widespread & woeful depiction & mocking of men & being male in advertising
  • car insurance is cheaper for women , surely a government agency or department can recognise this as clear sexual discrimination!? And rectify it??
  • the amount spent on women's health (excluding childbirth) clearly far exceeds men's health, just walk into any GP surgery and compare the number of women versus men accessing healthcare, yet every other thread on here seems to try to state otherwise. That's total feminist BS!!
  • family law is still very much biased towards favouring the woman (financially, retention of family home & access to the children) over & at the direct expense of the man in question

Many women these days seem to want equal or preferential access to job opportunities, careers, etc while also being busy mothers, they still want doors held for them & seats offered to them etc, yet they want to consider themselves 'equal' as well. it's like they wish to retain the perks of chivalry & the traditional patriarchal protection of women, while also wanting equal pay, opportunity , etc, etc, etc These positions are incompatible, but very few enlightened feminists can see beyond their sense of victimhood to realise that things like positive discrimination, bigger spending on healthcare for women and most consumer spending being centered around women consumers are indicators that it really is far from the man's world posters around here would try to convince you it is.

That's just total bollocks these days!!!

Further to this comment, what about all the unpleasant and dangerous jobs where the majority of workers are men? For example working on fishing trawlers, deep sea divers mending cables and pipes, workers in oil rigs to name just a few. I don’t hear much of a cry for women to get involved in these industries.

coxesorangepippin · 08/07/2025 03:10

Victim hood?

That'd be because women generally are, uh, victims??