Do you have a favourite child?

[outlanderish]

Settling a debate with DP. He's convinced you can have a favourite child. What's your verdict?

No I genuinely don't.
They are all very different. One is quite similar to me, I relate a lot to him, we have the same sense of humour.
One is easily the most challenging and often frustrating of the bunch, but also so kind and thoughtful that I could burst from it.
One is younger so happy and funny so much of the time.
I truly love all of them with my whole heart. Impossible to quantify against each other.

Nope.

I have no kids.
But my mother had a favourite child my brother.
And she was very vocal about it.
Well the golden child is just like her a compulsive lier.

My mother was the same,that’s why I don’t believe in this favourite bullshit. My 3 are treated all the same.

I have three children, I love them all equally but I’m very close to one of them she’s like my best friend. So I guess she’s my favourite.

I have a DS and a DD... I tell them they are my favourite boy and my favourite girl!

Nope, definitely don't have a favourite.
They're such different children that I have a totally different relationship with both.
It's hard to quantify love, but I'd probably say I love both in equal measure and get along better with each at different times of the day.
My ex absolutely has favourites: his eldest, by his first wife and our youngest. He doesn't try to hide this and all the children are aware of it. He's a prick.

Wow this thread blew up whilst I was gone. Thank you so much for all the replies, very interesting hearing everyone's opinions. X

4 kids here. Young.

Laughing at a lot of the responses above.

I have things about them all I love and things I find very grating. DD always has to argue about every single little thing and has an answer for everything but she is also so kind, loving and arty, insightful and the most impressive memory ever. DS (4) chilled, happy go lucky but lazy and SO VERY LOUD ALL THE TIME.

Other two are too small to be annoying yet

So no I don’t have a favourite. I also think a lot of “favourite” kids aren’t really the favourite they just give least hassle and are at a preferable age.

Fair enough if that’s you- everyone is different. But to pretend it isn’t normal to have a favourite child I think is disingenuous . there’s endless literature written about this- in the past it wasn’t even considered taboo.
And furthermore people who grow up with siblings are often quite able to identify that their parents had a favourite among them and to immediately say which is it :). Also I can often see it very easily in friends / family members. Some parents aren’t even remotely careful to hide it 🫣

Maybe he means one he gets along with better or one who is easiest to look after. My eldest and I have always just got on. She’s interested in the same things as me and she’s responsible and opens up to me about everything and anything. My second is more volatile, I feel like I’m on eggshells all the time and that whatever I say is wrong. She isn’t interested in anything I am so I have to fake interest in what she is into, which I try but YouTube is not that interesting 😂 she is very clingy when she is upset and crying and whinging but when she happy and actually nice to be around she doesn’t want me she just wants her dad. My third is young but again I find her hard to get along with. She flits from one thing to the next I can’t keep up. She cries over everything and will not talk anything through, she also has an awful habit of screaming when things don’t got her way. Yes I love them all but I certainly find my eldest easier at the moment. Maybe that will change as they get older and change themselves.

When my two argue about it I tell them the cat is my favourite child!

I disagree.

If you are aware you may have a favourite then you can make sure the children never know which it is.

I love both of mine so completely and devotedly that I couldn't begin to distinguish between them or put them in any kind of hierarchy.

This! And most of the time the cat is my favourite!

When any of my children ask if they are the favourite I tell them no, but they are in my top 5 of favourite children. I have 4 kids.

I have different connections with my DC. both have complex needs and one will need looking after/care lifelong. I have very different relations with them but I don't love one less than the other. I love them differently. I definitely feel a lot more protective towards the more severely disabled child. But I don't have a favourite.

Like others, I love mine equally, but I sure have one who is easier to be around. DD is charismatic and funny, I still have to remind DS to shut the door BEFORE locking it… but he’s a gorgeous kid too, he’s loving and smart and sees the world differently. I just wish I didn’t have to tell him every night to push his chair back in 😂
I also tell mine that the dog is my favourite, but even she drives me mad occasionally!

Growing up, I don’t think my parents had a favourite until my sister became unmanageable. Coming home drunk, saying and doing awful things to them and me etc. As a result, we have all fallen out, with me still close to our parents. It’s sad really, I wish it hadn’t turned out this way.