Child left in car in 35 degree heat

[Empress13]

Please tell me as I’m struggling to understand How the hell you could forget you have left a child in a car in such extreme heat. Unbelievable ! that poor child

I have a 2024 car and got this warning when it was really hot. Didn't realise it was this, but it figures as it has all the other mandatory safety features.

You are breathtakingly arrogant.

One of the men described in the WaPo article tried to grab a police officer’s gun to shoot himself because he was so distraught at what he had done.

I do believe these are Tragic accidents and horrible to imply anything other

I also read the article years ago and still think about it. Heartbreaking

I once took my dog for a walk to collect dd from dancing. Tied him outside to go and get her. Then went to get something from the shop next door with dd. Walked half way home before remembering the dog was still waiting outside dancing.
obviously no tragic outcome there but so easy to see how you can forget something when there is a change of routine. I expect I could easily have got all the way home if I was more distracted or stressed.

When I was about 20, I took the family dog from my parents house to visit an elderly relative. He went to sleep in the passenger footwell. I’d never had a dog in my car before. I went into my parents’ house and no one asked about him.

It wasn’t until the other dog asked for dinner some time later that we all panicked and wondered where he was. Even at that point, we all forgot for a bit that he’d been in my car. We eventually found him, still snoozing in the footwell, oblivious.

We were all really surprised, I’m very organised and quite uptight - I very rarely forget anything. Luckily, it wasn’t at all warm outside.

I also read that WaPo article years ago and I often think of it. Just really tragic for all involved. The brain is such a complex thing. I really recommend reading it if you’re struggling to understand. I went from ‘how could someone forget their child?!’ to realising that it really could happen to anyone, even the best parent in the world. It’s not about decision-making or poor parenting, it’s about habit and routine pathways in the brain.

Yes, and also driving to work sleep deprived after being up in the night with a small baby.

That's awful 😢

OMG people are not doing it on purpose.
Yes there has been a few cases like Cooper Harris, where father claimed it was accidental, but it was later discovered he had been searching online about child-free life and leaving children in the car. 99,9% of people leaving children in the car do that not because they want to kill their children, but because they think child is safe somewhere else

Well-known story. Father's day to take small child to daycare (US). He was busy and distracted and forgot about daycare and child. Left child in car. Mother rang to say where is the child, not in daycare, and he suddenly remembered, several hours later. Very hot day. Child died.

Just because you “don’t buy it” doesnt mean it isn’t a recognised phenomenon. It’s to do with automatic memory when you do something out of your routine on an otherwise normal day. So if you don’t usually do the nursery run and just go to work- your brain “forgets” you have a child in the car as it’s done the automatic “run to work” thing.

it’s why modern cars have a “check the back” noise reminder alert. It’s a sadly too common and devastating thing that has happened time and time again.

😪 I just can't imagine how you'd live the rest of your life after that.

The reallity is that this happens a lot but children dont always die, because its not hot enough. But leaving children and babies somewhere where you think they are somewhere else, is common

You just dont hear about it because of the examples on this thread, the parent goes running out or running back to where the child actually is and all is well.

Poor parents and poor child.

Children should not be left in cars.

I did too, and almost left him on the bus. Taking 3yo DD and newborn DS on a 30min journey. Parked buggy with sleeping DS in it, sat directly beside it (could even see into bassinet). DD and I chatted away. Got to nearly our stop, got DD ready to get off. Stood up, turned my back to the buggy and stepped towards the door. Would have got off without him had not another passenger said "isn't that your baby?"

No one is saying they ‘should be’.

If you mean the cases where parent has made a decision to leave their baby/toddler in the car because they 'just nipped in the shop' then yes I agree, that was not a good choice.

The case OP talked about, no I don't believe for one second the father decided that ah can't be arsed to drop the child to daycare, let me just leave them in the car for the entire day. Do you think this is what happened?

🫡

Remember when David Cameron was prime minister and he left his daughter in the pub!

No shit Sherlock.

This isn't how it works though. Unless you have never forgotten anything or been distracted by something ever in your life, you could do this.

I worked with a woman who had agreed to look after a dog. She planned to drop the dog off at her sisters on her way to work but she drove to work as normal and just went about her day and the dog died as a result as it was 30 deg outside of the car so inside, it would have been like an oven.

She had no plan to kill that dog. It was an accident.

This is how these things happen. Do some people do this on purpose? Presumably yes, by the law of averages but in most cases, it's not an attempt to get out of paying child support but just the human brain doing what it does.

The child was probably asleep when he left the car. There are plenty of posts upthread showing how easily this can happen, particularly if there has been a change in routine.

I’m not buying that ‘it happens’ either. How could anyone forget their child is in the car? Maybe for a split second but not for hours and hours while you’re at work. I do the opposite and forget my kids aren’t in the car with me whenever I go out without them, and on auto pilot open their doors and go to get the buggy out.

I once took older DS to school and popped into the classroom leaving DD sleeping in a pram just outside - it was a room where you could get in an out through a sort of French window so she was visible from the classroom. When I left, I was deep in thought about my conversation with the teacher and was halfway up the drive before I remembered DD. Going into autopilot is so easily done.

And they’re sleep deprived yet working!