What time would you put an 11 and 13 year old to bed over the holidays?

[Purpleturtle43]

If you have nothing for the kids to get up for in the morning? My husband and I can't agree what time is reasonable and looking for opinions.

I wouldn’t. They’re both secondary school age.
What I would do is make sure they’re not rotting in bed all day so they maintain some semblance of routine over the holidays, I’d expect them up and about by 9ish. But I wouldn’t be enforcing a bed time at their age.

10/11pm?

Why are you ‘putting’ kids of that age to bed in the first place? Can’t they put themselves to bed? Especially the 13 year old!

It depends if you want to spend any time with your husband

I don’t put my 12 yo to bed . No rules really other than she needs to be in bed when we’re in bed and also get up in the morning without fuss!

My 13 year old would laugh me down the stairs if I tried to put her to bed! She’s usually up later than me, although I do stay up past 9 in the holidays.

By putting to bed I mean lights out and screens off. Do people just let their 13 year year old decide when that happens?

10pm and 10:30pm if they have separate rooms, in their bedrooms at 9:30 though, lights and screens of at the former and second.

I have a 10 and 13 year old. The 10 year old is in bed by 8.30, lights off at 9pm. The 13 year old is lights off at 9.30, unless we are out or watching a film. They still both are awake at 6 to 6.30, so no way they are going later than that. I rather like 😉 dh and we need to have some time together!

In bed by 10pm and out of their pits by 10am.

We enforce screens downstairs and kids in rooms, but don't mandate the lights off.
At 11, I probably stuck my head round the door if the lights were still on when I went to bed (10-ish), but just to check they hadn't fallen asleep with the lights on, and say night again.

11 year old here, in bed by 9-9.30pm, reads till 10pm then lights off.
Way later if she's got friend sleeping over though.

As an ex-13 year old with siblings aged 11 and under, I finally found my voice and stated that I shouldn't be put or sent to bed at the same time as my younger siblings.

It was noted and I wasn't 'sent' to bed until 10pm and I reciprocated by not being annoying and demanding during that short-lived golden hour when I stayed up with the grown ups.

I remember watching the Ascent of Man during those times - and still find it one of the most fascinating TV programs ever made.

Oh, and no screens after 6pm anyway. We still all read together, as in we read to them. Then they go to bed and read tp themselves if they want. But that is all non negotiable. It's just what we do. No screens in bedrooms. Only books.

When I was that age my parents let me stay up as long as I wanted. I did the same with my DD for the most part. If I had to go to work and she had to get up to be somewhere then I would say 11/midnight would be bedtime

It’s just an expression. Jesus OP obviously isn’t giving them a bottle and singing lullabies.

Exactly 🤣

Well I'd say sending them to bed or telling them what time 'lights off' I wouldn't say 'putting them to bed' 😂😂

9 for 11 yo
10 for 13 yo
can read as long as they like in the holidays as long as they're not tired& grumpy in the day.

9.30-10pm depending on what we’re doing or watching but they can read in their rooms for a bit, not that they ever want to. I go to bed about 10.30/11 myself and I like us to have at least an hour on our own with adult tv (tv for grown ups not porn!) before bed.

But then I'm going back to the days when the only screen in the house was the one TV. DS is screen-mad but when he was younger he'd be so wiped out from his day he was out for the count once he was in bed.

He's a young adult now and as addicted to screens as much as many MNutters are; my own screen addiction included.

Screens away at 10pm is still my rule in my house and mine are 17 and 15! I was definitely still reading with my 11 yr old, she massively enjoyed me reading to her. I don’t have wake up times, I reckon if their bodies need to sleep, let them sleep.

In bed by 9:30, lights off at 10pm. Screens off at 10pm, but if they really can't sleep then they can read. If we're out, watching a film or doing something then later bedtime is fine. They need sleep, it's so important at these ages.

Unless need to get up earlier than normal the following day (going on holiday etc), make sure they are in bed early.

Make sure that you wake them up before a certain time as, when they do go back to school, been sleeping to 9am or later, they will struggle to get up at school day waking up time

Screens off and away at 930 then read in bed