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Original poster

Reception class allocation

107 replies

uniquemarta · 28/06/2025 09:10

Hello - before I get lashed out with harsh answers please be kind 🙏

👋 my son is due to start reception in September. There are 5 children from his nursery going to same school in reception, but only he's been placed in a class on his own while all the other 4 are together, one of which is his really good friend. I made him aware that he's not going to be in a class with his friends and he's is so sad to the point of tears; he said he feels very sad and confused he doesn't want to be alone in a class without his friends. We're both sad and anxious now. As much as I try to reassure him that he will make new friends and he will be well and enjoy school, I cabt help but worry how this is going to affect hid emotional well-being through this transition. He is a social boy but sensitive and emotional, he gets easily attached to people and he needs that familiar face to settle easily in a place unless he doesnt have that option. I approached the school manager and she bluntly said that they can't dp anything letters are out and that is that he needs to stay where he is. The nursery manager approached me and questioned allocation as she felt it isn't right also knowing how my son although able to make friends, often feels lonely and needs his peer support or a familiar face,. I approached again school and manager gave me the same response saying that "he will have other familiar faces in his class" and nothing can be done. I tried to let it go, I keep encouraging my son that he will make new friends and he will be absolutely ok, he cries every time I remind him his friends won't be with him as it hasn't sunk on with him, he always mentioned doing this and that with his friends in school. Nursery managers still question this and advised me to forward this to inclusion officer and assistant head, which o have. I read lots of forums in other moms experiencing this with reception and I can see no one had a positive outcome following appeal, so I am ready to accept it, it'll take a while especially for my son, but i had to try before I give up. Anyone had a different response? Thank you

OP posts:
Tryingtoconceivenumber2 · 28/06/2025 16:07

We were in this situation last year. DD moved from school nursery to reception. They put the 3 girls she plays with including her best friend in the other class. These 4 girls all started the same week as oddly they actually all have a birthday within 9 days and they even share a birthday party.

I would have been fine if just one of them was with my daughter. I asked for a meeting with the nursery teacher and she actually said that my daughter and her best friend don't play that much together and my daughter plays with lots of children as she is very sociable. However every day both girls always said they only played with each other. They refused to change it so we had to roll with it.

DD has been fine but her and her best friend are together for phonics and maths as they both work at a similar level. Both classes are in one big class and there is a lot of shared activities. However year 1 is looming and I think the classrooms are more separate and we have not yet been told the classes.

Children are very adaptable and DD has been fine but I get your upset. I was close to tears to think DD had been separated from her lovely group of friends and I'm pretty Stoic about most things. DDs best friends mother was also upset about it. I hope it works out ok for you x

AlertEagle · 28/06/2025 16:10

uniquemarta · 28/06/2025 09:10

Hello - before I get lashed out with harsh answers please be kind 🙏

👋 my son is due to start reception in September. There are 5 children from his nursery going to same school in reception, but only he's been placed in a class on his own while all the other 4 are together, one of which is his really good friend. I made him aware that he's not going to be in a class with his friends and he's is so sad to the point of tears; he said he feels very sad and confused he doesn't want to be alone in a class without his friends. We're both sad and anxious now. As much as I try to reassure him that he will make new friends and he will be well and enjoy school, I cabt help but worry how this is going to affect hid emotional well-being through this transition. He is a social boy but sensitive and emotional, he gets easily attached to people and he needs that familiar face to settle easily in a place unless he doesnt have that option. I approached the school manager and she bluntly said that they can't dp anything letters are out and that is that he needs to stay where he is. The nursery manager approached me and questioned allocation as she felt it isn't right also knowing how my son although able to make friends, often feels lonely and needs his peer support or a familiar face,. I approached again school and manager gave me the same response saying that "he will have other familiar faces in his class" and nothing can be done. I tried to let it go, I keep encouraging my son that he will make new friends and he will be absolutely ok, he cries every time I remind him his friends won't be with him as it hasn't sunk on with him, he always mentioned doing this and that with his friends in school. Nursery managers still question this and advised me to forward this to inclusion officer and assistant head, which o have. I read lots of forums in other moms experiencing this with reception and I can see no one had a positive outcome following appeal, so I am ready to accept it, it'll take a while especially for my son, but i had to try before I give up. Anyone had a different response? Thank you

You’ve made it worse by telling him that all his friends will be in the other class. It is not the end of the world he can still see them during play time outside the classroom and he will make new friends. You should help your child be independent and happy in a new environment and not rely on familiar faces to feel happy.

Lifestooshort71 · 28/06/2025 16:18

Op??

Tagyoureit · 28/06/2025 16:23

Annascaul · 28/06/2025 15:30

Never heard of this!!

Show quote history

Oh really?

Theres about 3 soft plays around here that do a meet and greet for the local primary schools on set days. The school gave us a leaflet. Its definitely a nice way to introduce the kids and parents.

feelingrobbed · 28/06/2025 16:28

My child isn’t with her ‘bestie’ they both survived. Your reaction can make a big difference here. It’s not too late to be bright and excited. My DC is completely unbothered now and looks forward to seeing her at lunch breaks etc. They’re still best of friends.

Hallywally · 28/06/2025 16:48

He’ll be fine. Neither of my kids (one sociable, one shy) knew any other kids when they started school & both made friends.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 28/06/2025 16:53

I promise you this won’t be a thing after week one. I worried in a similar fashion and my child made a bunch of new friends pretty much immediately plus the classes mix together often anyone so I’m sure they’ll see their friends at play time and probably afternoons when the learning is more informal.

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