To have insisted on DH doing his ‘business’ at work when we were down to one bathroom

[WarmDeer]

I told my friends this last night who found it amusing so would be interested to hear if they are the only ones!

We were down to just our upstairs bathroom this week as the downstairs bathroom was being re-done (finally finished yesterday afternoon).

Given the heat, DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work rather than use the upstairs bathroom, as I didn’t fancy the smell festering all morning in this heat.

DH was fine with this - AIBU to have made such a request?!

The level of insane, arse clenching prissyness on mumsnet never ceases to amaze me.

Everyone poos. Everyone. Shaming someone for pooing in their own house is not reasonable or the act of a balanced and normal person.

When we had our (single) bathroom redone there was a point for about three days where we had to use a toilet oan with no seat and the bathroom had no door. It wasn't great but we simply got on with it.

You got me!
I actually thought this was real! Nice one OP.

It was the post about the en suite that made me realise this is a joke.

This exactly. When your body is telling you to go. You should go? It's unhealthy to hold it in, can cause constipation etc.

Also (for women especially) sitting on the loo can trigger the pooping, it's probably the position. You just supposed to ignore that natural process? For hours?

Close the bathroom door
Open the window
Buy some poo poree (yes a real product designed for this situation)
Research diet ideas to reduce stink
Go to the doctor

All of these are great alternatives to stopping your life partner from popping in the toilet he likely had a hand in purchasing and is designed for exactly that function.

Am I the only one who originally thought ‘his business’ was about wanking not shitting ?

This has got to be a piss take now.

You send him to the gym at weekends for a poo rather than use your MULTIPLE toilets are home????

You are very unreasonable, batshit crazy and controlling!!

Does your flush not work?

How can you control this? There are times when it's really impossible to hold it in. What if some poor sod gets food poisoning?

Because I don’t produce such nuclear level stenches, to be frank!

It's not the lack of toilets that's the issue then....

This reminds me of years ago my sister and I went into a shoe shop and there was a man trying on shoes and his wife was on her knees, pushing down on the toe of his shoe (like you would with a toddler) and said in a real twangy voice, ‘yes but are they comfortable??
we just could not believe our eyes. We both said it ‘please don’t ever get like that’.

You have surpassed her. I hope my sister reads this, she will really laugh 😀

If this is real I hope he raises his self esteem enough to be able to leave you one day.

So his colleagues have to suffer because you won't let the man take a shit in his own house? No, not unreasonable at all 🙄

I'd tell him to LTCC

( Leave the controlling cow)

But he can shit in the family bathroom and if it smells she can shower in the ensuite? Point is they still have two bathrooms even while the downstairs loo is being redone or whatever it is that’s happening, absolutely no need to ban poor DH from pooing.

What is wrong with some people and bathrooms. I really don't get it at all.

we had a plan did we?
You mean you did?
Sorry i refuse to believe this is even real

🙄 another bored poster.
Get yourself a hobby dear x

Yes. Surely.

You have a toilet in your en-suite that no-one uses? Seriously?

but if needed then he goes to the gym on weekend mornings so we had a contingency plan of him going there.

wtf!

And don't you clean your teeth in the en suite?

but if needed then he goes to the gym on weekend mornings so we had a contingency plan of him going there.
BUT YOU HAVE TWO TOILETS!

What the fuck

Smelly is generally healthy poo

This must be a wind-up, otherwise it is ridiculous and controlling.