To think my mum is wrong!

[Toddlerteaplease]

(Lighthearted) My parents spare room is really hot, so I asked if they had a thinner blanket. I said I like to be covered as the monsters will get me. She says that’s rubbish!!

Of course you need protection from the monsters. If a thicker duvet is all that’s available you can get away with just having it up against your back with your front and most of your body exposed. Monsters always attack from behind.

It's just basic ABC

Always
Be
Covered

Anyone remember Gary Larson?

Sheet for a cover during summer, but for the cold winter nights, when you need a thicker layer, a monster snorkel is essential

It’s so easy to be dismissive of the knowledge of older people. It’s her house. She knows the monsters better than you do so take the protection of the thick blanket. Or insist on a thin blanket and prepare to meet your fate👿🤡👺👹

@AssassinsEyebrow You need family therapy. Is your DM seriously so naive?

Some mothers don’t need an excuse. They align with the monsters, all the while pretending the monsters don’t exist. It’s gaslighting.

they are afraid of you tbh
so help me

your mother is wrong 😑
I’m still in bed and have risked my knee out.
I saw a 1 tog duvet in Dunelm the other day , that would be a good anti monster device.

Oh no, I’ve never been worried about monsters in bed. Yet another thing to keep me awake at night now. Thanks op!

I don’t want to worry you further but they’re everywhere and nowhere is safe really. Can you ask your GP for antidepressants because it’s a big thing to deal with. 💐

Excellent!

I hate that they do that too, cowardly.

It’s compounded for me because I have various birds living in my loft so never really know what’s making the noise. Birds or monsters. I feel they’re forming an alliance and that can only lead to really messy blankets.

That’s the bane of existence.

You realise a blanket is no barrier to a monster right

But it is because they can't see you!

When I was a child, I spent hours lying in bed trying to slow my breathing or practising sounding like i was asleep when I wasn't because I was worried the monsters would know the difference between a sleeping person (who they would leave alone) and a pretending to be asleep person which, to a monster, is the same as being awake.

It's a skill I still occasionally employ now! 😁

"I came to bed and you were fast asleep!"

Ha ha! I was not!

I wear bed socks so the monsters can't see my feet if they accidentally stick out of the covers.

I hate the monster simps

"They're more afraid of you than you are of them"

So why are they so fucking scary????!

They're monsters!!!!

Don’t be so silly!

I always have a sheet or a blanket, and I’ve never been attacked by a monster in bed. Proof doesn’t come more compelling than that!

Duh- you jump in and out of bed. They may be monsters, but they don’t have elastic arms.

I hope you haven't listened to this song then.

Eminem and Rihanna boasting about being FRIENDS with the monsters. 😬

You've got me scared now OP. I thought I was safe if I stuck my toes out but apparently not.

I hope they look under the bed and check the cupboard for you before you go to bed ?

But think about it, all those got by monsters whilst under a blanket are not here to tell the tale so🤷

I need a sheet because the monsters in my house are under the bed. They can’t find me when they come out.

Duh - they move though, they’re not static.