Schools and their shit - a rant

[Icannoteven]

Aargh! Schools and their incessant shit!

I have two kids, one leaving infants school and one leaving juniors for comp and this month has just been back to back bullshit. I’ve had approximately 3 billion emails from each school about events which require parental participation in some form or attendance at school during the school working day.

Leavers disco, dress up days, tombola donations, leavers assembly, leavers performance, end of term trip - parent helpers needed, parents evening, fucking bake sales, welcome evening, welcome day, welcome afternoon tea, Father’s Day event, summer fayre, parent helpers for summer fayre, summer picnic, non-uniform day, sport day, information evening, chance to meet the send team and on and on and on. A separate email for each one.

Jesus Christ. Am I supposed to take the entirety of July off to deal with school admin and attend day-time events? It’s so relentless. Add medical appointments on top of all this shite and it’s amazing any parent manages to ever hold down a job.

Do schools not think about the burden on parents? Do they think everyone has a SAHM?

I run a secondary school medical room so I can't vouch for primary but we absolutely do call in order of listing and many kids have dads first.

It occurred to me recently that this is probably because more women do 'keyworker' type roles ie education, healthcare etc that have to be carried out on site, whereas there are a lot more dads working from home these days.

At secondary school age the kids will often tell me which is the best parent to ring, or if they are both working and a grandparent/other contact is a better bet.

And you were also working full time? And never stuck in traffic etc

It absolutely is and it's ridiculous to argue otherwise. Just because it's not the primary focus and because an 8 year old requires less care than a baby doesn't change that fact.

This happened to me, there was some sort of technical issue (ha hem admin issue), within the school office. It meant loads of parents weren't sent the email to participate in playtime. My dc stood in the yard watching the other parents, waiting for dh, or I to turn up. It was heartbreaking, dc still remembers it to this day, despite us never having missed anything else! Agreed, it isn't that easy to say, "You don't need to go to any."

Yes, and no.

It still isn't, no matter how much you argue that it is.

That was very fortunate. I suppose you also worked 10 mins from school and could just walk out without cover if you needed to go to the school. In most people's lives it's a bit more difficult than that.

So when you left your abusive partner with your toddler (according to
previous posts) was that all part of your perfectly planned and executed life? Or did you experience some unexpected shit like everyone else?

What sanctimonious bollocks.

As I've clearly stated, I prepared for every eventuality. I'm not sure what's so hard to grasp.

Why is it sanctimonious to bring a child into the world, only when I was fully prepared to take care of it properly, under every circumstance? Did you perhaps misspell, "Sensible"?

It's absoutely part of the deal, which is what I've said all along.

Otherwise no sane parent would actually let their kids go to school.

Oh yes, because every mum has the luxury to CHOOSE to have to work to feed and house their children. Silly me! I should have just chosen to not work and go to all of their school events!

Well exactly and that's when many of us points out that school admin need to be a bit more efficient is met with it's all on us parents to be organised.

As any workplace, it's not too much to ask that they employ competent people and not just random 'mums' from the playground that is usually the way in my experience. Nothing wrong with that but please employ one with admin experience at least.

I am constantly surprised at how much better secondary schools seem to me at all of this sort of thing. Obviously, varies from school to school. But, for example, DS' secondary school easily sends me eamils addressed to me by MY name. In 10 years at our primary, they haven't managed it a single time.

I assume it has to do with systems and IT and all the like?

But I agree - it's really not that hard to see on the system if mum or dad should be calle dfirst - most parents are asked to fill out "parent 1 and parent 2" so it's pretty simple.

It’s perfectly possible for the admin to well organised. The school secretary at DS’s infant school was excellent. He junior school office is crap.

i agree but primary school offices do tend to be busier is a more hands on way eg child weeping at tiny graze, prolific nosebleeder, vomiting child etc. in secondary these things happen but the kids are older and more resilient so admin can verbally sympathise then continue typing relatively uninterrupted

As a former teacher I didn’t get to see my DD in any plays, attend any assemblies, Y6 leavers’ assembly or prom night because it clashed with an Open Evening at my school. The only events I could attend were Parents’ Evenings. Just don’t go.

You want schools to employ an adult with admin experience? That's a big ask these days in some parts of the country, do you realise? In my area they are now starting to try to save money by employing 17 year old apprentices now instead when a long standing very experienced admin staff member leaves.

....Seriously, the funding situation in state schools is terrifying at the moment. And then you read threads like this and just roll your eyes, because a lot of the time it's being covered up how dire things are - parents don't know the half of it....Expect many many more threads like this on here over the next few years....

This thread could honestly have been written by me. Two kids, endless emails, costume days, discos, fayres… I’ve lost count of how many “urgent” school messages I’ve had this month.

I got so frustrated up I built a little tool to help me manage, it pulls all the school emails that has an event and adds it to my Google Calendar. Now I can just glance and see what’s happening today, the next 7 days, and what’s coming up. It literally saved me from missing my son’s phonics meeting last week.

Its called Sync School Events (syncschoolevents.com). It’s made a big difference, instead of drowning in emails, I just check the dashboard and know I’m covered.

Thought I’d share in case it helps anyone else.
It’s Google-verified and free to try.

what in the name of
god is a phonics meeting?