Schools and their shit - a rant

[Icannoteven]

Aargh! Schools and their incessant shit!

I have two kids, one leaving infants school and one leaving juniors for comp and this month has just been back to back bullshit. I’ve had approximately 3 billion emails from each school about events which require parental participation in some form or attendance at school during the school working day.

Leavers disco, dress up days, tombola donations, leavers assembly, leavers performance, end of term trip - parent helpers needed, parents evening, fucking bake sales, welcome evening, welcome day, welcome afternoon tea, Father’s Day event, summer fayre, parent helpers for summer fayre, summer picnic, non-uniform day, sport day, information evening, chance to meet the send team and on and on and on. A separate email for each one.

Jesus Christ. Am I supposed to take the entirety of July off to deal with school admin and attend day-time events? It’s so relentless. Add medical appointments on top of all this shite and it’s amazing any parent manages to ever hold down a job.

Do schools not think about the burden on parents? Do they think everyone has a SAHM?

Same as your kids teacher should run out leaving her class of 6 yr old alone while she rushes away to pick up her own kids from another school. I'm sure you'd be fine with that

Childcare isn't compulsory. School educationl is. You pay fees for your childcare - directly, or claim funding for it if you're entitled to it as a working parent. You choose when they attend, according to the days and times you need to cover your working hours. Your child doesn't HAVE to attend childcare legally. You cannot be fined if you choose not to send your child into chldcare on multiple occasions, or go on holiday whenver you like (however you must still pay the fees whether they attend or not).

School hours and terms are set, and legally your child must attend at those times (unless you homeschool of course). You don't have to pay any fees for them to attend. They can't attend school when school is finished for the day. They CAN attend after school childcare on school premises if your school has that set-up and you pay for it. If not you need to arrange alternative paid childcare. There will be minimal educational activiites at that afterschool childcare. Because it ISN'T school.

You're conflating the idea of a teacher caring for your child (as in showing concern and compassion for, being attentive towards, having an interest in, checking on the wellbeing of), with a childcare facility. And that's why teachers say that "school isn't childcare". Because they know to distinguish between the 2 types of provision.

As i said in a previous post, the educational provision of core school hours happens to equate to enough hours during the day in term time for a parent to do some paid work. It doesn't cover a full standard working day and parental commuting time, hence parents having to pay for additional childcare of their choice to cover the rest (or not, if they can pick them up themselves/or someone else can pick them up. )

If your child is unwell, or there is an issue at school such as boiler breakdown/no water etc, then they can't partake of the educational provision and therefore the parent is responsible for collecting them to be looked after.

Why do people STILL churn out this old tripe? Do you seriously think that teachers actually get those holidays? Most of mine are spent either in school doing stuff, or at home doing stuff, or in training.

I have several close relatives who are teachers. I know they get those holidays. They might nip in for a couple of hours in the last week but let’s not pretend every teacher is working through the whole holiday. It’s tedious.

And so many of them say they would leave their job if the school holidays were changed because that is the perk for them. And yet on threads like this, suddenly they barely get any holiday! Confusing ;-)

That's where having the aforementioned back up plan comes in...

And a teacher wouldn't dash blindly and panic-stricken out of the school without a backwards glance, leaving a classroom of entirely unattended 6 year olds simply because they got a call from the school for a sick kid. There are other adults in a school environment I'm sure you're aware.

You've overegged that and embarrassed yourself a bit.

You choose to work and juggle, no one is making you.

Give over. The whole system is designed to be the opposite of helpful. Parents are expected to be in two places at once, even on normal school days. Here are the 3 expectations of society, directly in opposition.

The 9-5 work system, designed for a man with a wife.

The termly 8.30-3.30pm system, designed by who knows what ungodly mess of financial pressure, pedagogy and again the assumptions that mums are always there

Third, a new entry in the charts.. the fun late capitalism system, where every second of our time is monetised and every household needs 2 x full time working adults to service running costs.

It doesn't make sense because it isn't meant to. It is an unwinnable system. Saying it's one person's choice denies the impact on all of us of living in this system.

also NB impossible to plan before you have kids as it simply never occurs to you that there could be a system - the normal system everyone is expected to do, in a civilised country - that is so batshit and unwieldy. How could you know??

As an aside, a few years back on here I was on one of those teacher's salaries vs holidays vs other office jobs threads.I genuinely believe teachers work long hours and overtime but having worked it out, it isn't more so than the average corporate senior job with responsibilities- it's just bunched up and lumpy over the year.

Lokamon so there's one rule for parents who are also teachers and one for everyonelse. How hard is it to comprehend not all of us can rush out of our jobs at a moments notice. That's point the previous poster was making. No need to be so narky and rude about it.

Why are you saying there's a different rule for teachers? Of course not. They need a back up plan same as everyone else with a job they can't leave. Which, you know, people have. Where did I not say that?

What I was refering to was the laughably overdramatic

"Same as your kids teacher should run out leaving her class of 6 yr old alone while she rushes away to pick up her own kids from another school. I'm sure you'd be fine with that"

and pointing out that a classroom full of children wouldn't be left with no adult present even if a teacher had to leave suddenly.

PP was wanging on as if the teacher would stand, mid-sentence, with the infants on the carpet around her and suddenly dash from the room, her skirts flailing in the wind as she raced across town to her sniffling child leaving the poor darlings to live off berries and start a primitive society.

How many times do you ‘accidentally’ call dad first when it should have been mum? I bet never.
I’ve never heard a single dad complain this has happened.

But it seems s the scenario where a school is huffy because a parent needed time to get from work is ok. ? You can have all the backup you want but there's srstill no guarantee they can be at the school within 5 mins at any random time

Lol. Of course it was bloody sarcastic. But some posters so seem to believe a y parents can and should just drop whatever they are doing and run. And not always so easy.

Our school office likes to really mix it up by varying the way they notify us as well, sometimes an email, sometimes an arbor message, sometimes both, sometimes just a tagline in the newsletter which is sent by email, or arbor, or sometimes both, and sometimes on a Friday or sometimes on a Saturday morning.

Then don't get in a tiz about it. The school is every bit as entitled to get huffy about you not fulfilling your responsibility as you get by your restriction in circumstances. They are people too.

Sometimes, as you say, it can't be helped. If you have sincerely done everything you can then just let it go.

I'm not in a tiz about it. Only ever affected me once when the school got me to lose a days pay trekking from London when DD 1 had a bloody stitch!!! Which she told them was a stitch at the time.

Its that kind of nonsense that pisses people off

You'd be the first to complain if your DD had suffered a cardiac arrest and they didn't call you. It's more common in children than you'd think.

I don't understand how people can work so far away from where their children are in school. If there's a real, serious emergency, which again, does happen, you're comfortable being an hour away? I certainly wouldn't be. My children come before anything else.

What's that got to do with a stitch? If she had a cardiac arrest id hope they'd call an ambulance rather than try to get me to pick up. And I live in a commuter town. Majority of people hence commute. Even those who don't cannot necessarily get to a school in 10 mins. If I didn't drive I'd need to get a bus( half hourly service) / taxi ( if I had money) or walk 3 miles for a school pickup. Could easily take half hour or more

I assume you think I should live on benefits to be sat in the house ( or wait outside the school all day) just in case the school phone? Unrealistic.

I fully understand the difference, thanks.

Yes, kids are going to school mainly to be educated. Yes, that is different from nursery where the primary concern is that they get home alive rather than them being taught French.

But when children are at school they are still being looked after by someone else.

So children, being cared for. Literally "childcare".

I know some teachers get uppity about that, but literally millions of parents roll their eyes at them everytime when they say school isn't childcare. Because it 100% is.

It 100% isn't.

You are lucky to have that option. And presumably there is someone in every school who is trained to carry out CPR?

There has to be qualified first aiders - and all of the courses, Paediatric and Adult - include being trained and assessed on CPR.

No, I'm not lucky. I planned things out very carefully before having children, and ensured I was in a position to cover every eventuality. It's a shame most people don't do this.

Yes, we have qualified first aiders who can administrate CPR. I'm a paediatric first aider. I still couldn't put myself in a position where if something happened to my child and they wanted their Mum, I wasn't able to be there until it was too late.

Ok what was the plan if your husband had buggered off and you had to support your family alone ? Or you were in hospital with another child for appointments when one at school injures themselves. Or you were stuck in a bad traffic jam and road was closed etc. seeing as you have covered EVERY eventuality

No, I'm not lucky. I planned things out very carefully before having children, and ensured I was in a position to cover every eventuality. It's a shame most people don't do this

You’re very lucky that you were able to plan and cover every eventuality. Most people don’t have the luxury of being able to afford to do that. And the birth rate is already low - if everyone had to be as perfect as you there would be next to no children being born.

Well he did, actually. I had to flee severe domestic violence, which ended up in me being permanently in a wheelchair. Still managed to be 100% available for my children. HTH.