Still in nappies at school

[ivehearditallthistime]

As the title says some children at 4-5 and 6 years old are going to school in nappies and are still not potty toilet trained.
I understand that some will and still have accidents at night and during the day.

But to have a child at that age still in nappies is just laziness.
It is not a teachers job to change nappies is it.
Ive just got back from my sisters whos son has a 4&5 year old still in nappies the school said he or the mum will have to come in school to change them as the teachers will not.

They now think this is all wrong and it is the teachers job.
And are removing both kids from school one does half day and going to home school.
I said no its your job stop being so f=ing lazy if home schooling is anything like your potty training good luck.

My eldest sister a teacher agrees with it and said this is happing more and more now.
A mum in her school has taken her child out of school because teachers will not change her childs nappy hes almost 6.
Said mum had a rant at the school because the school reported it to SS.

Dose anyone agree this is just lazy parenting now.

Many were also working from home and homeschooling their older children. Lockdown was not a holiday with lots of free time in my house that’s for sure

You sound privileged and uneducated, like most ‘know it alls’

Correct. It's laziness, unless there's a medical issue. Although a class teacher would never have to change a nappy as they would be in class. It would be TA. Although I have known a HT do it.

My son was bowel issues, pants not nappies, high functioning Asperger’s, I really did try, he’s 34 now.

My son's bowel is permanently damaged due to complications from cancer but I completely agree with you. Childhood cancer does get a lot of attention when obviously plenty of children are unwell, have chronic conditions etc that don't get nearly enough attention.

It's the same with hospital too. The oncology ward he was on was like a different world compared to the other wards he was on at the hospital and that's because so much funding, charities, donations etc go to the oncology ward compared to other children's wards.

No

This was OP's 2nd post.

Yes it is the class teacher who will sometimes have to change nappies plus another adult has to be there to ensure there is nothing untoward happening. And sometimes it could be the headteacher doing it or more likely being the helper/chaperone.
And from what I have been told these are not SEN or ND children.

Yet other pp's have had comments such as SEN isn't an excuse, I potty trained my SEN child so why can't others, children without SEN shouldn't be allowed to start school if they aren't potty trained (when so many children who are SEN won't have a diagnosis at 4 when starting school) etc

These threads always go the same way despite the ''Oh no, not SEN children''.

The class teacher has never changed my son, it is always TA's.

Who is telling you if children aren't or are SEN/ND?

There are more mainstream children needing changed but a teacher wouldn't do this. I am a teacher and I can assure you a teacher is far too busy teaching to do this. If a teacher is on PPA, most would send a child to a TA.

A fair few posters have given (justified) reasons why their DC had difficulties during potty training @Kirbert2. The OP was clearly not talking about these types of issues.

As yet nobody who claims it's due to laziness has explained why they think these " lazy " parents would prefer to keep their child in nappies and have to deal with all that brings rather than just toilet train them.

As I said though, when people start talking about children who aren't potty trained shouldn't be allowed to start school then they are including children who potentially have SEN but aren't diagnosed yet.

and as pp and I have brought up a few times, changing an older child is far from lazy. It's hard work and potty training is the easier option. I just think it is very easy to throw around ''lazy''. A typical 5-6+ year old doesn't want to wear nappies and for parents, a potty trained child at that age is easier.

I'm pretty much in agreement with you on most of your points @Kirbert2

I was just pointing out that the OP probably wasn't including children with medical issues in her comments. But yes some children may have undiagnosed SEN. Although I'm not sure why these cases (being still in nappies) seems to be increasing (according to teacher friends)?

I was born in 1977 and can still remember the name's of children in my infant class who had toilet accidents every day.

My SIL didn't go to playschool (as it was called then) as she wasn't reliably toilet trained.

I'm sure there are some lazy parents, but the terry-nappy generation weren't necessarily "trained" so much as out of nappies...

My eldest i sent to school (age 3) in pull ups because he would have accidents sometimes and I didn't want it to get everywhere.
The school were understanding and it only took a few months until he was able to not wear them because he stopped having accidents.
It wasn't laziness on our part. We have 3 children and both the others were dry day and night before starting school. He just took a bit longer. Kids are all different. You can't always say it's lazy parenting when some kids just do not pick it up at the same time as others despite all you do.

I know OP wasn't but threads always lead to comments that tend to include SEN children too.

The last thread was worse as I was pretty much told how awful I was for expecting my disabled child to be changed at a mainstream school because it isn't fair and he clearly belonged in a SEN school. It was even suggested that my disabled child should be left soiled until I was able to go and change him myself.

All my DC (all are autistic) were dry at night before the day. I tried training DS1 too early and it was a disaster that let to chronic constipation that didn't resolve until he was 7. DS2 I can hardly remember as life was just dominated by DS1s toileting issues. I felt a lot of pressure, particularly from MIL. Which given she had an awful time with SIl, seems a bit strange. I guess misery loves company 😅

DS3 and DS4 I took a much more relaxed approach to. Both would use toilet/potty before bath from quite small. DS3 got a bad nappy rash at about 3 and decided on pants after that. DS4 accepted being told I'd run out of nappies. Also 3 ish.

A BBC report cites a charity as saying that the number of children having difficulty with toilet training has increased. They do refer to lockdown as a factor.

(I have checked the thread, but I might have missed someone already posting the link. If so, apologies.)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cp3dykw576yo

I've posted this link on another page: ERIC stating that waiting for readiness can be problematic: "In recent years, there has been a move towards waiting for signs of readiness before potty training, but this misses the key point that many children, and particularly those with additional needs, may never give any signs that they are ready to potty or toilet train."

https://ihv.org.uk/news-and-views/voices/toilet-trouble-supporting-the-1-in-4-children-starting-school-not-toilet-trained/

ERIC the bladder and bowel charity now recommends starting using a potty when they can sit and start moving towards independence around 18 months

https://eric.org.uk/potty-training/

@Kirbert2

The last thread was worse as I was pretty much told how awful I was for expecting my disabled child to be changed at a mainstream school because it isn't fair and he clearly belonged in a SEN school. It was even suggested that my disabled child should be left soiled until I was able to go and change him myself.

😮Appalling

Children forever have been toilet trained at 2/3, definitely before 4 when they start school. Additional needs are understandable…… supposedly we shouldn’t judge, but it’s hard not to judge a mum who sends her kid into school in a nappy without a medical reason.

The height of laziness and selfishness. Poor kids will likely be embarrassed and bullied wirh a stinky bulky nappy at that age. Disgraceful.