51 and so very tired from working - but I have another 15 years to go yet

[chinesestirfry]

certainly not wishing my life away BUT ...

I am just so worn out, tired, lethargic from working. Like the rest of the world, I have been working for 30 years plus. It's not the job, the job is not pressured at all. I work hybrid. It's very family friendly. It's the constant need to deliver/manage and keep going. Keep pushing at work, keep turning up, keep up the façade that I'm interested. keep up the enthusiasm, keep playing the game (so to speak). I (we) have another 15 years before the mortgage is paid off. I don't know how I will last that long. Technology at work is moving so very fast. It's all now beyond me and I don't care to keep up with the moving pace.

I have to carry on but I have nothing left in me to give

I feel the same in my late 30s. I sometimes see people on here saying that they love their job, and I wonder what on earth it is that they do!

@chinesestirfry are you me? I could have written your last post word for word. I’m 56 next week. No answers just solidarity ..x

I'm a lesbian and wouldn't wear a rainbow lanyard either. Completely unnecessary.

Sounds a little like functionality freeze. I was the same over Winter I would get up and then could easily nap until lunchtime, just wanted to sleep really

If you're in peri it can improve, I'm now 58 and energy levels have really improved since I was 50, it has really helped me get back on top of my job and helped at home too. DC now more independent too, though DM needs a lot more care as getting very frail.

This age group (I’m in my fifties) is the sandwich generation. Having to look after elderly parents and children. It’s interesting how many SEN parents have commented on this thread (I am one too). I agree with so much of what has already been said. I would very much like to go and live in the middle of nowhere where I can just be left alone. One thing bringing me the tiniest amount of joy currently is the We Do Not Care movement on TikTok - for ladies of a certain age!

I'm older than you but have been through periods when my interest in work has been v low. Now I'm more enthusiastic.
In my mid 40s I did consider retraining - is there something you'd LIKE to do other than keep pushing yourself at something you are "meh" about?

Mine didn’t.

I had to retire at 58 because of menopause.

God not everything is hormone is related.

I swear if someone says they’ve lost an arm ‘oh is it peri’. She’s been working 30 years plus. She’s tired of it. God im 41 and im tired of it.

Unless you have a vocation yes it gets tiring and boring. And even with a vocation everyone has a limit, caring for family, working, it’s a lot stop diminishing everyone with peri peri. Life is hard sometimes.

Unfortunately changing job or career is not an option. The job has very little pressures, and at times I can give myself an easier day when WFH, it's just all the bullshit corporate/manager/HR/objectives/upskilling/creating exposure crap .. on top of feeling half dead every day.. The money is great for what I don't do. I'm in the office today, half asleep at my desk (again). When I say desk I mean the hot desk I have booked, which is literally a blank desk with a cable for my device to link to the larger desk screen. Long gone are our own desks with photos, a drawer of my personal filing etc. Everything in the office has been stripped back to almost nothing.

I used to know our system inside out. I've worked in almost every section, working my way up. I knew all the terminology, processes, inter-linkages, co-dependencies. Our system upgrade is very new technology and I am waaay out of my depth. But this is just an aside to the way I am feeling. I find it very hard to get started with any task, I have to conjure up a huge amount of effort. There is practically nothing let effort wise - it left with any trace of energy I had left.

I don't have a thyroid and take meds every day for this. I will look into getting bloods etc done. I am in peri.

not everything is hormone related but still worth exploring HRT. It gave me a lot of energy.

I think I’d take the day off and say I’m the Invisible Man 😁

@ForWittyTealOPIm also thinking of doing a masters but I’m torn, I don’t want to waste the time and money if it won’t really improve my prospects. What are you going to study?

I felt like that in my late 40s. Over the period of about a month, all my ambition and drive just evaporated. I couldn't have given 2 shits about any of it. I left, took some time out and then went into something entirely different. I like my current part time job enough but I'm starting to feel physically knackered by it and wonder how long I've got left in me.

I’m 45 soon, and our mortgage will be paid off when I am 67 but when I can fix again soon, I’ll be over paying. Only £30 a month to start but going to continue over paying as we want to get that paid off as early as we can. We haven’t been massively wise with money, but we are starting to save and our pension pots are good, and I pay more into my pension as well. I feel like in need to retire at 55, but I know that is sooo unrealistic.
I haven’t read all your posts but can you overpay your mortgage and get it down sooner?
It’s shit, so solidarity!

I'm 62. I've switched from a London job to a local job with a 10 minute commute which helped but it's still a struggle. I go to bed at 9pm just so I can keep going.

18 months and counting until my mortgage is paid. DS will be at university or maybe working. He'll still need some support but I'll be able to move somewhere less expensive.

Could not agree more! So sick of hearing about 'peri' this 'peri' that!

We do rainbow lanyards too. It's pretty wanky but not as bad as the dressing up days. Plus it did inspire me to get a collection of other lanyards - FBI, Dr Who, VIP, Press, etc - that I wear to amuse my grumpy self while the managers tit around in Bo Peep costumes.

Could you take some time off. Get a line from your Doctor to give yourself a break. I am 61 at 59 felt totally done in. I left home at 6:45am and didn't get home till 5:45pm. I took early retirement . I don't get a huge pension but it's enough. I also managed to get a job in Waitrose 2 days a week. It helps boost my income and get 20% off my weekly shopping so save about £20 a week. Best decision I ever made. Good luck

That’s life.

I think I’d hate to retire ( and I’m about 20 years off that anyway!) but I’d like to do something that feels either more meaningful or is practical in some way. God knows what though. It’s not peri for me, and it’s not elderly parents ( dead) or kids ( mostly grown) it’s just office jobs I think.

I very much sympathise.
I’m 58 and am struggling to feel enthusiastic about anything to do with “work”. By the time you get to my age I think most people have had enough of it.
it’s all bollocks anyway.

What’s the point of this post? I’m sure most the country would prefer not to work (I get some people really like their jobs, but most would also like to retire if possible - key words “if possible”). What’s your solution?

@GiveDogBone weird reply

@chinesestirfry obviously many of us feel your pain. Thirty years of working is fierce. I do envy those who still have passion for theirs.

I'm the same age. Is going part time a
possibility financially and within the roke you do now? I work 3.5 days a week which suits me well.

I couldn't retire as attractive as it seems as i know I would be utterly bored and fall into a fug of depression. I like and need the structure of work. For another 10 years at least.