Sophie Ellis-Bextor concert. Ugh

[IOnlyWantSexMoneyPowerAndRevenge]

Saw her last week. Good fun. I missed the opportunity to wear my glittery Christmas dress though.

We all know she has legs that go on for days and likes to show them off (so would I if I had them!). At various points during the show she had to bend over (dropped something and so on). Every single time, at least one man wolf whistled. One man started and then others thought it was OK to join in.

I mean, really? They weren't sat near me or I would have said something. It pissed me right off. We were there to sing and dance to a bit of disco and grotty men insist on making their thoughts knoen about how attractive she is. As if anyone cares.

Most of the audience were 50+ which somehow made it even more grim.

Yuk just yuk.

& the groupies desperate to sleep with them.

So I guess you think its ok for builders to sexual harass women walking past in summer wear

That is never OK.

But using language like 'showing off' perpetuates the misogyny. They are just her legs. They happen to suit a short skirt.

So it just perpetuates this misogynistic DM language along the lines of 'flaunting', 'stepping out'. That then filters down, or becomes so insidious you don't notice it. Then women in short skirts (including for example, girls in school uniform) = fair game for wolf whistlers because: Look, there they are showing off/drawing attention to their legs. Rather than just walking. Using their actual legs. (I mean, obviously anything is fair game for sexual harassment, but I'm trying to make a point about language and not doing it very well!)

I know you are naming it in the context of a stage show and of course, SEB is a performer, so you could say her whole act is 'showing off'. But it's not just her legs doing the work here!

When people seem not to understand the difference between a woman wolf whistling a man and a man wolf whistling a woman, is that genuine or is it faked? As in, do some people genuinely not understand the effect of thousands of years of patriarchy?

Does it matter? We can still call out inappropriate behaviour when we see it.

If I was wearing a short skirt I wouldn't be bending over at the waist at all, I'd just bend my knees if i needed to bend down - isn't that what others would do? I mean if she didn't like the wolf whistling every time she did it then it's easily remedied surely?

Or she could just have said something to the crowd like 'I know we were all around in the 80's but lets leave the wolf whistling back there shall we?' I'm pretty sure she could handle the crowd, she's always come across as pretty confident to me - I don't think she's being given enough credit here!

I want to say YANBU, men are gross but I can’t be hypocritical.. Have you ever been to a Take That concert?
Ninety thousand women practically throwing there knickers at the stage like a bunch of horny teenagers.. Not me though, I’m just there for the .
music 😉

Yeah, how dare MIT50s go to SEB concerts. They should know their place and stay at home with their pipes and slippers, or if they really must go to gigs, they should only go to see ugly old men like themselves, never mind if they like the music or no. SEB is strictly only for us girls, everyone knows that. The only exception is gay men. Any straight blokes sullying an SEB gig should be made to wear blindfolds throughout, so that they appreciate the music and not just leer at poor little SEB.

See, you're not the only person who can talk shite on this thread. 🙄

Screaming over the music too.

Or the men could behave like grown ups and not letch at her in a nasty way?

None of those men will be reading MN so no one is really calling it out, are they?

As SEB came to prominence with Spiller in 2000, is it really surprising her fans are middle aged. If she had been offended I'm sure she could have done something about it. OP, if you are offended then that is on you and nobody else.

Can't believe the comments here, wtf has happened to mumsnet. The internalised misogyny is off the charts.

I've only ever been to one gig where there were screaming girls/women, that was Wham! in 1983. I may have been screaming myself, but tbf I was thirteen. It was my first and only time. I quickly learned to become a pretentious pain in the arse cool 80s teenager, feigning disaffection at just about everything.

So what? We don't discuss it at all?

Of course - if men don't read what we write, what's the point in writiing it at all??

Theres plenty of women just in this thread excusing men’s behaviour.

Depressing isn't it?

The threads on wolf whistling always go the same way. It won't be long before someone calls those who object 'uptight' or jealous and that we should see is as a compliment!

50+ man here - not bald though. I was at SEB gig in Birmingham on Monday night. She was great. Didn't hear or notice any wolf whistling. Nor did I notice that she did lots of 'bending over' either.

Oh, and I was with my wife, so hopefully that's ok!

That is clearly not what is being said. Sophie Ellis-Bextor has a brand. That brand is heavily built on wearing short skirts and her legs. The frequent dropping of things is clearly designed on purpose to elicit a response and discussion around her. Nobody is saying it’s right that men react in that way but you’re shockingly naive to think it’s not all designed as part of the show.

Yes, people can post whatever they like.

Which is why I did.

The rest is your conjecture.

Yet, internalised misogyny is used if you don't agree with the OP.

Excusing men’s behaviour abc blaming women for it is internalised misogyny.

May the lord open.

I know what it means.

Tbf I don’t think the women complaining about men wolf whistling at concerts are necessarily the ones who get creepy around male slebs. I’m not saying there’s no overlap but I would personally never make lewd comments/whistle etc because I know how uncomfortable it is to be on the receiving end.

TBF it's not just men.

Brandon Boyd always takes his shirt off during concerts and the women go wild he is aging like a fine wine