Dh going to uni aged 58 - worried about money!

[Meowsmol]

Dh had to stop working 3 years ago due to a disability, FND. He was high up in IT but can't do it as his hands don't work properly anymore.
He now wants to do a psychology degree looking at neurodiversity. he's thinking about some sort of business/ coaching thing.
He called me today to tell me he's been accepted onto the course and they'll help him with student finance.
We have 2 children 1 in last year of college in sept so looking at 2026 uni. She wants to do forensics and biomedical science. So will need a fee loan and maintenance loan.
Ds is starting college in September for a level.
I'm the only one working. Dh gets pip. But I can't see how we can make this happen.
We rent and my dm has recently been diagnosed with dementia and df has mobility issues.
My brain is broken.

It sounds to me that after 3 yrs of not working he wants some purpose and fulfilment in his life. He might rationalise it as training for a new career but let's be honest it sounds unlikely that it will happen at 62, and as others have said I don't think a Psychology degree will help with business coaching.
On the bright side, if he gets a student loan he will never pay it off!
If he's intested in coaching he could investigate student support in your local Uni (dyslexia, dysplasia, anxiety etc), or mental health support that is being rolled out to schools. Maybe they would have shorter training times and clearer career outcomes.
I appreciate your worry about the money but having a happier, motivated DH around would add to everyone's life surely?
As for DD, many students have a PT job at Uni or top up the coffers in tbe holidays. Talk to her about it.

Haha, just seen your post above OP which echoes what I've tried to say above. Good luck!

Thank you, that's fair point

That's a really good idea.

Can he work as a support worker supporting adults with autism. Sounds like he has decent goals but needs to work out what is practical and achievable

Sounds like he’s on a folly. Bollocks to that. Tell him to get a job like most people do and contribute to the cost of life for you, him and his family.

Would you give a job to a 58 year old disabled man who hasn’t worked for three years?

Him wanting to go to Uni is admirable but I'm guessing he's feeling lost after having to give up his job, but kindly it is not all about him.
You have teen DC who will want to go to uni
and Finishing his degree at 62(?) will he really set up his own business
Sorry, but it's not fair to expect you to bear the financial responsibility alone, or the household responsibility.

Just seen your update. That sounds like a much better plan.
He already has experience given your DC are autistic

It’s still not fair, and anyway it won’t be funded.

There are non degree Coaching courses around. Some are online.
There are loads of university degree courses that are based solely online.

No reason at all why your DH couldn’t get some p/t paid work to supplement his student loan. Nearly all students have to work now as the finance doesn’t cover student living expenses and most uni courses do not have full time lectures any more, as they accept the financial reality that students need to work. There are opportunities in schools for example - jobs like learning mentors or parent support workers if he is interested in neurodiversity
That way his student loan could be used for paying his way in the household, as if he were paying rent in student halls.
If he gets PIP and is classed as having a disability there may be bursaries available. I have an acquaintance who was accepted onto a degree course for free as she was unemployed.
Doing some related work beforehand may help with his application- good psychology courses are extremely popular and competitive - and this may also help him decide if it is really for him before embarking on an expensive degree.

This
unless he is going onto. Master degree and doctorate, this degree will not let him open a business and coach others.

Can he contribute to family expenses from his PIP? You need to find the money to support your daughter as a student as a priority - it may take her some time to get a job. He doesn’t need a degree and could study through the OU.
You’re much younger and he has no pension and is selfish to boot; I hope he’s worth it but my resentment would be building. It’s hard to carry everyone.

He’s already got a place.

Yes, it will be. Just not the maintenance loan when he reaches 60.

It’s funded for the entire three years if you’re under 60 on the first day of the course.

Why do people keep suggesting the OU? That's really expensive and he wouldn't get a maintenance loan, which is the thing that might add to family finances.

Supporting autistic people in the workplace has no money in it! Who would be paying for that service? The people you’re supporting can’t afford it, usually nor can their family. There is a completely saturated market of non profits, consultants and recruitment firms trying to do the same thing and charge the employers for it and honestly there just isn’t the appetite for it- why would employers employ someone that they need to pay for support for? There’s plenty of other people they can hire. It’s a really complex space and there are a lot of people in it already- NAS, Neurodiversity in Business, Genius Within, Rangam. None of these people are making much money from it- they’re all trying to do it off charity grants/piggybacking other businesses because the employers won’t pay!

I am all for education at any age . But realistically he is planning at say 62 (if its a 4 year degree) to start a new business? Or be employed in this field without experience. At 62 ? When most place will hire younger people.
Not that they should only hire younger people. But just being realistic in terms of a job at the end of the degree.

I just read some more of your posts and I am astonished your DH did not pay into a works pension- a person who has retired has no pension cannot expect to do anything but subsist, let alone go to university.
Also as an IT specialist DH should be fully aware that coaching businesses are the most prolific type of business on the internet and it is now impossible to make a living doing that, plus a degree is completely unnecessary-he retired early had a huge scare and has got over it and is now bored- tough luck, he can't expect you to fund and run a household and 3 degrees alone-madness.

I agree with @Starlight7080 . However much he’s kidding himself, this is very much a hobby degree, not a career move, and the reality is that very few people will employ a newly qualified, disabled person with practically no experience in that field, who’s in their sixties.

Thanks for clarifying. So with the bursaries, this could all be financially advantageous for OP and her family. What makes me pause is the forthcoming changes to PIP and how that could affect things.

Then he could defer for a year and save a bit of money, to contribute.
I am totally in favour of lifelong learning. But I wouldn’t be doing this at the sacrifice of the rest of my family, including my children.

@Laurmolonlabe makes a good suggestion. Can he go into IT consulting, or get an IT customer service or help desk role which he can do from home ? I have a disabled friend who does this, and works from home. It’s one of these jobs which is perfectly set up for wfh.

If he were to defer for a year, where would the money come from for him to save? He doesn’t have a job and is unlikely to be able to get one.

Conversely, if he does take up the uni place he will get a maintenance loan of several thousand pounds, which would be additional income for the household.

Can you explain the benefits of deferring?