My ex and I split in February. He is an alcoholic and drug user.
The day before I was due to get results from a biopsy he disappeared on a bender (something he used to do every 1-2 months for periods of 1-7 days).
I finally saw the light and told him we were finished. I haven't communicated with him since, except via text asking him to remove his belongings from my home.
He has repeatedly text me, asking me to take him back, apologising for the way he has treated me etc, professing his undying love etc. I have ignored.
Four weeks ago, a friend of a friend (John, for the sake of clarity) contacted me to say my ex had shacked up with John's wife and John's kids (they are seperated).
As my ex was still messaging me, I forwarded screenshots of the most recent messages he'd sent me (while he was living with this woman) to her via social media as I figured if it was me, that's what I would want. She read the messages then blocked me without reply. Fair enough, her perogative.
I also messaged my ex and told him I had sent the screenshots to this woman, that I wanted nothing to do with him and reminded him again to remove his belongings from my property.
Ex stopped messaging for a couple of weeks, then started again, denying there was anything between him and this woman and telling me he would come back to me in a second if I would have him. Again, I ignored him.
The same day, I had another message from John, telling me that his ex had gone crazy at him as she'd worked out he had told me my ex was living with her. She is now making it difficult for him to see his children as a result of this. John is understandably concerned that my ex is living with his children as John knows he is an alcoholic and drug user, although John's wife denies this so has probably not witnessed the extent of it yet.
John wants me to message his wife and tell her about my ex's alcoholism and drug use and also send her screenshots of the new messages.
Whilst I hate the idea of this woman being taken advantage of as I was throughout my relationship with him, especially as she has children who will be affected by it (ex can be aggressive and violent when drunk), the fact that she blocked me when I sent her evidence before really makes me think she doesn't want to know and any further contact from me is not going to help matters.
AIBU to think that as I've already made her aware, its time for me to step back and allow her to learn his nature in her own time?
Or should I try again?
I am in the middle of my first round of radiotherapy and could do without thinking about any of this but I keep worrying that if I don't warn her again, I'm being a bit of a shit woman, solidarity-wise.
Thanks in advance for any advice x