Men DO NOT have right of way!

[CalmDownCats]

Has anyone else noticed this?

Since around my mid-40s I've noticed that, in particular older men my age or above, just barge straight towards me and expect me to get out of their way.

Since realising this seemed to actually be a thing, I now just hold my ground and keep going. I sometimes even get silly, smirky looks from them as they go around me, as if they know exactly what they are doing.

It's usually older guys, never really younger ones.

Is this just me or does it happen to others too? Is it something that's always happened to middle aged ladies or just a sign of the times?

It’s not something I recognise, I’d probably say I see it more from women walking 3/4 abreast and too oblivious to move.

Ooh, love a bit of patriarchy chicken! I go running and come across this at times, and when I do, I increase my speed and charge forward, take on a grimly determined stance complete with a laser-focused facial expression, and the men move pretty fast, let me tell you! 😂

Yes and if it happens again ( or WHEN it happens again) I will do what op have said and stop and look at the very important message on my phone and see what happens

TBH I usually find that young women glued to their phones are the worst.

Indeed- Hand holding couples are the problem.

I do a real dickhead move where I just stop, stand totally still and start looking for something in my bag or pocket.

I had one guy walk up to me and also stop.
I ignored him. He persisted. I eventually stopped rummaging and asked very politely if I could help him and he exhaled/ grunted at me then huffed and walked off 😅

He wasted 15 seconds off his life because he basically wanted me to know he was angry. Lmfao

I agree- that and couples glued to each other.

I'm disabled and have spacial awareness issues, if anyone plays it with me I probably wont even notice (because bumping into things is so second nature to me) but will walk into them.

Hell I walk into inanimate objects, walls and you think they would know better but often our pets because they didn't get out of my way lol.

A lot of women locally to us often seem to think blocking the doorway of the supermarket or the entire pavement is the place to stand and chat when they come across a friend.

My 90 year old mother has this with groups of students (university town) who walk in groups of three. She’ll just stop and they’re so surprised. They do laugh nicely and apologise when she says that she hasn’t reached the grand old age of 90 to kill herself by walking in the road.

Swimming pool patriarchy is not really a thing at well-managed pools - mine does have a list of lane etiquette about how to deal with swimmers of different speeds and so on, and I have seen lifeguards talking to swimmers about it. (I like to go at a time when I can have a lane to myself, so then it's not an issue anyway.)

I might be bloody minded but usually I would step into the road to let a mother pushing a pram or with young children pass. I do take exception when it is quite a wide pavement and they are walking side by side plus a dog.

I can’t remember where I first heard it, but if you want to get through a crowd of people, look above their heads. They magically move out of your way. When you scan faces, people subconsciously pick this up and are aware that you’re paying attention and so assume you will go around them.

It would be interesting to see if this helps in a situation where there’s just you and an entitled man (or three) steaming towards you. I tend to stay out of the way of these dudes as potentially antagonising men makes me feel unsafe, due to past situations I’ve experienced.

I just stop, as I'm not altering my line of movement in a subservient manner, as if im not there. Stopping flummoxes them as they have grown so used to people moving out of their way and there is not fault as I haven't bumped into anyone

I pick the inside of the pavement, that way they can still spray across as they wish but one of them has to go in the road or drop behind, same with tow path

Near where I live there is a famous boys public school. They are by far the worst IMO.

I've noticed my own husband does this. It's not through any sort of power play - he's genuinely just totally oblivious and, ultimately, selfish, because he's not thinking of anyone else other than himself.

As he (of course) strides ahead just in front of me, rather than walking alongside, I'm left trailing in his wake trying to figure out which way he's going to go as a last minute decision when he realises people aren't just going to get out of his way.

I'm only on the first page of this so far, so I'm going to carry on reading and hope that I come across a perfect retort/comment to say as he'll only otherwise think I'm criticising him rather than educating him!

Yes, when there isn’t much space I always make way for women with prams and small children, because I remember how shit it is trying to navigate your way round with a fucking pram. I really hated my pram-pushing era 😁 Plus, it’s a kind of instinctive thing to make sure little children stay safe.

One thing this thread has proven is that it’s not just men.

I didn’t know this is a legit game! I have days of being nice and other days of being a dick. I still find that most men are nicer about giving way. It is usually women that are problematic but none have as yet fought back my sharp elbow. Bicycles are annoying yes. And group runners, ffs some during midday weekends on the south bank! I don’t move for anyone I find annoying, looks entitled or is not paying attention around them. I admit I am judgey

I live in London and play this game everyday with f tourists! Completely not self aware or give a damn about locals going about our lives. They meander 2-3 abreast on narrow pavements and stop in the even narrower areas in groups. And then the large tour groups! I very loudly say “excuse me”
or “getting past” and in some cases “tw*”

Elderly gentlemen (using that term specifically) never seem to do this, and when I’m with my dad he always walks roadside. DP has on occasion tried to push me in to the verge to avoid other people who won’t move, he has had very short shrift for it. I’m happy to move for those less able to, and I’m certainly happy to move if someone else indicates too (you can generally tell intention by how people look at you), but if someone moves in to my path deliberately or has that won’t move glint about them (which you learn to recognise) then I simply stop. Yes it’s generally men in my experience although not exclusively.
The very worst instance was when I was with my mum (elderly and on sticks because she can’t walk far or well), and I was lining up to get coffee and she was walking towards a near table, a mid 60s couple saw and changed their course to run and get to her table first (it was pretty empty and plenty of space), people can be absolute arseholes.

I'm too short to do that without hurting my neck Most women are about 4" taller than me (especially younger ones) and most men at least 8" taller.

I think most people are agrophobic which would explain their instinct to stop in pinch points like doorways/ by the stock trolley, or spread out maximum occupancy across a path.

Splashy-Front-Crawl men can't swim two abreast across a lane because they'd drown each other in their wake
I solve that issue by swimming in a lake. I do give way to the swans though!
I've admitted to my sons that I've kept them up to stage 8 swimming so they have good technique and are not going to drown everyone else in the pool with a sloppy arm-slap technique.

Victoria St always provided offenders for me to play with. I tend towards the unobservant anyway so I've accidentally being playing for years, but once I realised it (via Mumsnet of course) I take great pride into leaning into it.

I play patriarchy chicken. Sometimes you need nerves of steel.

What are they supposed to do, lug it into the road then up the pavement again?