School's punishment of all boys in year 6

[htdt]

My son is in Year 6 and has done SATS this week, today was meant to be a fun day for them as they've finished all the papers.

But my son came back from school really upset as the teachers had separated the girls and boys and he says the girls got to do fun activities and given treats but the boys got told off and given a lesson on respect.

He's taken this badly and has said things like 'I must be bad because I'm a boy'.

It's such a shame because he's worked really hard and was otherwise enjoying SATS week, but now feels horrible about himself, the teachers who told them off and the girls getting rewarded when all the boys were punished.

I feel like I need to speak to the school next week and find out what's gone on and why. I also feel like making a complaint. But I'm not sure what they are going to do to make things better even if they did agree with me that it was not a great way to deal with some boy's bad behaviour and also very bad timing so should I just forget about it...?

Ok well I’d like to call out the many many girls that have mocked , excluded, disadvantaged and bullied my ND daughter and all the girl bystanders who did nothing. Really there should have been collective punishments aplenty. I should think there are many parents of the bullied and kids with SEN that could suggest collective punishment.

This will be more than a one off event. As I’ve said this is a serious response and I would be getting context before I did anything. But in principle a lesson on exclusion based on sex for boys, that is unfair (it likely isn’t), maybe it should be a formal part of the curriculum.

Oh do give over, you’d really know nothing of being truly fucked over.

Neither do my sons.

What? That makes no sense. Try again.

I hope that you are not teaching your DD's that they are perpetual victims.

Yes they do.

Nope they really don’t. You don’t get to write off and punish my sons simply for being male.

What decade are you living in? That's a horrendous thing to say

No need, it was pretty clear.

Horrendous? Have a word with yourself 🙄

Teaching boys that being male is bad isn't going to solve the issue.
And neither is giving out punishments based on the sex of the person.
Its just going to cause more and more problems.

Teaching boys that treating girls differently and not calling it out is necessary.

Really isn’t. Literally no idea what you were trying to say.

All boys need it. It is necessary.

Nope not the ones that have been raised properly. And again you don’t get to write off and discriminate an entire sex.

Your problem

And that puts girls in a whole special group of their own as they are going to be treated differently and be protected by the boys.

It doesn't work.

What needs to happen is that every child gets lessons in respect and relationships.
And those that don't adhere to that get punished whether male or female.

Collective detentions have always been unfair, usually a sign that a teacher has been tipped over the edge.

Girls do that all the time with girls that are different. I think some collective punishment and writing off of the entire sex can go both ways.

yep we're all monsters

take your child out for the day.. jesus christ 🙄I love being told to have a word with myself

When DS was in primary anytime teachers did boys Vs girls they'd always always have the girls win.

Yep and many many girls are in dire need of lessons on respect and relationships.

Yes they do. Because whilst you might raise them right you aren’t the only thing that creates their thoughts, feelings and views. Schools are toxic places and we see division based on sex starting as young as 2 when children are placed in social environments. By 4/5 negative behaviour is starting and by the end of ks1 girls are actively being told they can’t join in, they aren’t fast enough, they aren’t strong enough. Even if you were present 24/7 to correct that subtle messaging you are up against the collective. And by the end of ks2 peer voice takes over mum voice.

All boys need that lesson. Delivered firmly. Beyond the home. Constantly.

Mean girl treatment is an entirely different issue and nothing to do with sexism. Are we really, as women, trying to detract from embedded sexism by asking for girls to be punished? And you wonder why there’s an issue.