HELP! Inappropriate message from client I clean for.

[LemonLass]

Need advice on how to proceed, ladies.

Just started cleaning for a chap in his 70s in a town I lived in for 20yrs. His partner lives around 20 miles away and asked for help on his behalf. He has grown up kids and grandkids and is a professional (medical) semi retired.

I have cleaned for him twice and he goes out once I arrive.

I am due to clean tomorrow. He has just messaged to advise a plumber will be at his tomorrow. Owner will be out on his motorbike. OK, not ideal someone there but ok (I have a key).

Then I received this message. Urgh.

My instinct was block and dont engage and return key (he will be out).

Alternative to send this screenshot to the partner and say why I quit (and drop key as above).

Or go and clean as he wouldnt be there.

I am not a prude but his text was totally inappropriate. I had thought he had sent it in error but no word from him since to backtrack.

Comments and advice please ladies. Would you clean for this person under these circunstances. This extra money is £13ph self employed if that makes a difference to your comments (not a lot but very handy sideline).

How awkward!

PS i think i have successfully scrubbed anything identifiable.

Yes air enough in one sense - it's possible it was accidental.

But actually I was addressing the people who think it isn't accidental, but still advice conciliatory behaviour (which is what calling this 'inappropriate' - rather than sexually abusive or sexually exploitative, predatory etc - is)

I don’t understand how anyone can say you are being unreasonable?!??? Looks like everyone who has commented agrees YANBU

same? I do have a headache , and am tired please someone explain which bit is rude???

Open the picture and read the next post the op made

It doesn't look like spoofing: it has the same formatting with spaces between words and commas that is in earlier messages.

I thought this. It's so random and out of keeping with the rest. Even the lack of capitalisation etc. I wondered whether he'd left his phone somewhere and somebody was having a laugh.

Thanks, at least you've acknowledged this can happen.

I wouldn't be working there if it were me.

I know some people are saying it was meant for someone else but I can't think of an innocent answer for sending that to anyone. Whoever it was meant for it is grim.

He CLEARLY sent it in error!! That’s not sexual harassment, but a saicy message (each to their own) to his GF or whatever, but not for you.
He probably doesn't even realise! I sent a text meant for my mom to my friend this morning - saying what time I’d arrive. Only realised 12 hrs later abd thank fuck, it wasn't the other way around and I’d sent my mom the message I sent my friend before that saying how much I was dreading seeing her. Happens soooo easily!

Clearly how?

My first thought is it was sent by accident to you and meant for his partner

If it was it's highly embarrassing but nothing surprises me nowadays. Regardless of age this type of text seems to be accepted as the norm so he'd no doubt laugh it off.

No he has written something and than deleted. Sentence starts with a small letter.

It's also been hours and no reply

He sounds like a chancer and a dick. Don’t waste your life energy on him. Don’t work for him again, and give back the key in whatever manner is safest and easiest for yourself.

Assuming you clean well and are reliable and trustworthy, you will find other clients.

Click on the photo to bring the whole image up. The relevant bit is at the bottom

Spoofing had been mentioned by PP.

If he was sexting it's quite possible he received a message that he assumed was a response to his and didn't notice the other person didn't receive that specific text.

There is no chance this is accidental if his profile picture is him topless. Don't reply. Go and put the key through his letterbox in an envelope with his name on and write on the back of the envelope that it's from you. You don't need to explain anything to him. Don't text him. There will almost be no repercussions, you don't even need to say anything. If he does message you and start harassing you as to why you gave the key back you don't need to explain yourself. Go silent and block him. He knows he has sent you the text. When he sees the key posted back through the door he will know exactly what is going on and that it's not worth trying it with you. Someone who crosses boundaries so brazenly with a cleaning lady who enters his house alone is not someone who should be trusted. It is possible that he could try and lunge at you one day when you are in his house. I'm serious. Someone who behaves like that will have a lot more behind it in terms of behaviour. Don't go to that house again.

You wrote: ‘Perfect for a razz on the bike’. Do you think he thought your message meant something else? I don’t know what ‘razz’ means but I think he thinks you’re taking about masturbation and he is just replying in kind.

@LemonLass send him a message and say you can't make it tomorrow as something unexpected has come up. When he reads that he may see his earlier lube message. At which point he will either apologise and be mortified or he will say nothing. Yes, wrong texting happens, been on the receiving end of that myself. But irrespective, he needs to apologise with you prompting him to do so.

Go with your instincts. He has a topless pic and sends sleazy messages. If it was to his partner he would have checked with her by now why she hasn't replied.
£13 /hr is not worth this level of discomfort and there will be plenty other clients

I think he was possibly messaging two people at once and sent the wrong message to you x

Just don't go. You don't need to send an explanation when someone does something like that. When he realises you haven't arrived he will know why.

Exactly. All of this stuff about it could be a mistake, OP should be polite etc.

How about OP could end up being alone in a man's house who sends her messages like this?

Don't put yourself at risk OP.

Exactly this