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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel these parent are not understanding ( WhatsApp and Sats )

190 replies

Bringmecookies25 · 12/05/2025 01:07

I will try not to drip feed.

DC clas have been preparing for the Sats with mocks/ practice and this has included doing it exactly the way it will happen on the day which has lead to other students noticing “ access arrangements “
today a parent queried in the class WhatsApp group about this
for example “ Henry has said that some people are not completing the tests independently and staff are writing/ reading for them and that a few of them do not finish at the same time and can leave the classroom “

it was politely explained by one parent and seemed to be accepted by parent of Henry - this thought triggered another mum who to be fair is often triggered to pipe up and go on a rant about how it’s always the children who get it easier and it will not be a fair judgement for secondary school sets etc
( area means most children will be going up to the same secondary school ) they then started rambling about GCSEs like what happens at GCSE they get an easier ride in them to get in to colleges ?
this then caused a trickle ( not most ) but a few of the other parents to join in agreement.
My DC is one of them who will be receiving the access arrangements and probably more so than the others as they will have extra time / breaks / scribe and reader in maths etc.
from mocks my DC is likely to get
WT nearly WA in spag - last came out at 97
WA in math - last was 102
GD in reading comp - last was 117
will score low in teaching assessment of writing.
one of the complaints was which I did take to it to beinf towards my DC that sole on the children are not even behind and it just means they will be benefit and have less stress than her DC.

I just wanted to shout at them they have no understanding of the situation and that the point of access arrangements is not to give them a better chance than others but to give them an equal chance !

OP posts:
Combinatorix · 12/05/2025 06:59

I can recommend leaving the whatsapp group, I left when my eldest was in year 6 and never joined another one

PinkCentipede · 12/05/2025 07:02

@LivelyCrab

DD has an EHCP, and my experience of school so far has been a school trying to reject her placement (which I now fear may happen throughout her education), DD being completely overlooked because she is well behaved/extremely quiet, arguments with the SENCO, general dislike/ostracisation/emails ignored/battle over provision. I’m not seeing the EHCP as some sort of ‘bonus’ - at all. While I think a few people may try and fix the system, the SEN Mum’s I know have very genuine and valid concerns.

skelter83 · 12/05/2025 07:04

All children can have the questions read to them during the tests (apart from the reading paper).

Sapana · 12/05/2025 07:04

Happyinarcon · 12/05/2025 04:31

People are losing faith in schools and in how their child’s learning is managed in comparison to others. While it’s obvious that some children need additional support I can fully understand how it can look unfair and confusing, especially as some kids are left on waiting lists for ages and ignored

They need to focus on their own child and their own child's needs and not the help another child is getting. If they feel their child doesn't have the access arrangements they need, they need to speak to the teacher. Otherwise they need to back off from another child's learning which is nothing to do with them.

UpsideDownChairs · 12/05/2025 07:09

My eldest is allowed to type. If he wasn't allowed to type that would be it - he wouldn't be passing anything (I pity his poor maths teacher because that's the one exam he can't type).

These accommodations let the kids prove what they know.

I do have some concerns that in the big, wide world, these accommodations obviously won't always be available - but TBH, only a little bit, modern tech is coming on so much that living without writing or reading is becoming more and more accessible.

Goditsmemargaret · 12/05/2025 07:22

I would respond exactly what you wrote in the last paragraph about them not understanding and the point of it is to make things equal.

However I'd prefix with something like "I had to take a day to respond here as I was so upset by these remarks I needed to make sure I was calm"

Then finish with
"That's all I have to say. I won't be entering into a debate about this."

LondonNootropics · 12/05/2025 07:37

MikeRafone · 12/05/2025 05:07

I’d add this photograph to the WhatsApp group and just put under -

the stacking boxes are the access arrangements in the sats, is this what you want to take away from those kids that need them?

This is exactly what came to my mind! I’d share this and say ‘be thankful your child doesn’t need access arrangements, but also feel confident that it has no impact on anyone but the children involved’
I wish people would mind their own business!!! 💐

reluctantbrit · 12/05/2025 07:37

Just tell yourself - 2 more months and you may never need to speak to some parents again.

DD is sitting A-Levels from next week onwards, extra time, smaller room and rest breaks. All these adjustments were given after long and difficult discussions and diagnosis.

I am sure she would prefer normal exam circumstances and not having ASD/ADHD.

Sherararara · 12/05/2025 07:39

Combinatorix · 12/05/2025 06:59

I can recommend leaving the whatsapp group, I left when my eldest was in year 6 and never joined another one

This. Best thing about moving to secondary was leaving the class whatsapp group!

VeterinaryCareAssistant · 12/05/2025 07:44

Nobody actually cares about SATs other than year 6 teachers.

Hohofortherobbers · 12/05/2025 08:00

1AngelicFruitCake · 12/05/2025 05:50

My child has extra time and a poster on another thread referred to them as ‘dumb kids’. My child is desperate to get expected. Left to do it without time pressure they’d be a high expected but even with extra time im
worried they won’t get expected ☹️

I saw that thread, it hurt me too.
My ds will have a reader for him today and will reach his full potential due to this. I am very proud of him

itsgettingweird · 12/05/2025 08:00

People are ignorant.

My ds had access arrangements for GCSEs and still got a range of grades from 4-9’s. This is because he doesn’t do better with the help - it just means he can reach his full potential.

maybe just a simple link to the access arrangements guide and nothing else would be a good response?

You’ll never educate those who don’t want to be educated but maybe those who didn’t have an issue before and have been persuaded to have one now will read it and change their minds back?

Bringmecookies25 · 12/05/2025 08:06

Hedonism · 12/05/2025 06:32

The best thing about having a child in y6 is knowing that the class WhatsApp group only has a few weeks left to run 🙌🏼

I hear this !!!!

OP posts:
Suns1nE · 12/05/2025 08:07

The “problem” with access arrangements isn’t the arrangements themselves it’s that there will be students that would benefit from some level of additional support but don’t get it because it’s not severe enough. That middle group that don’t quite meet the criteria for help but can’t achieve the necessary levels without it.

the system needs to spend more time looking at other ways to measure ability and remove the barriers in the first place rather than just giving some assistance to work round them

ToffeePennie · 12/05/2025 08:09

Just trying to get accommodations for my autistic son was a nightmare! Thank god I’m not dealing with WhatsApp crap too!
They are brainless idiots.

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/05/2025 08:14

@Bringmecookies25 sorry not understanding sats here. different country. but if trying to be equal is the way forward then surely everyone should start at the same time and do the same test with no assistance. the way it seems to be done in your country is a bit like a game of golf. the better ones are given a handicap! I have never understood the use of handicaps in golf. everyone should start at the same line, do the same work alone, or end up with false results.

ToffeePennie · 12/05/2025 08:19

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/05/2025 08:14

@Bringmecookies25 sorry not understanding sats here. different country. but if trying to be equal is the way forward then surely everyone should start at the same time and do the same test with no assistance. the way it seems to be done in your country is a bit like a game of golf. the better ones are given a handicap! I have never understood the use of handicaps in golf. everyone should start at the same line, do the same work alone, or end up with false results.

Edited

SATs are Standard Academic Tests.
childre do them in year 2 (7-8 years old), year 6 (so 10-11 years old) and year 9 (13-14).
Accommodations are things provided by the school and government to assist those children who struggle in exams. For example; someone to read the question if the child is dyslexic, having a break every 20 mins if they have ADHD.
Accommodations are really difficult to get and parents and children have to prove their child needs it before it is granted.

ToffeePennie · 12/05/2025 08:20

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/05/2025 08:14

@Bringmecookies25 sorry not understanding sats here. different country. but if trying to be equal is the way forward then surely everyone should start at the same time and do the same test with no assistance. the way it seems to be done in your country is a bit like a game of golf. the better ones are given a handicap! I have never understood the use of handicaps in golf. everyone should start at the same line, do the same work alone, or end up with false results.

Edited

“Better” children are not given a handicap. Children who struggle are given help to make it a level playing field. Some children struggle to do certain things in a certain timeframe that others can do easily. It’s about making it a fair representation of what that child can do.

Rosscameasdoody · 12/05/2025 08:20

Tell them that these adjustments are mandated by the Equality Act to make sure that children with special needs are accommodated to an equitable level to their peers. Tell them that equal doesn’t mean everyone having the same. It means everyone having what they need. This is just another pathetic example of able bodied people envying something they see as - as a poster on another thread described it - a ‘perk’ of disability. There are no ‘perks’ to disability and a compassionate society does what it can to mitigate the disadvantage disability brings.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 12/05/2025 08:26

They're just ignorant and their opinions really don't matter. You know that your dc is not getting an unfair advantage.

Might be worth mentioning to the school in case anything gets said by the children of these ignorant people.

Sleepthief · 12/05/2025 08:29

Ask if they get cross about wheelchair ramps or guidedogs being allowed in shops? 🤦‍♀️ Equality is not about everyone having the same, it’s about making things accessible to all regardless of disability or special need.

Or just ignore. It must be a shitty existence getting so worked up about things that have no impact on them 🤷‍♀️

NJLX2021 · 12/05/2025 08:29

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/05/2025 08:14

@Bringmecookies25 sorry not understanding sats here. different country. but if trying to be equal is the way forward then surely everyone should start at the same time and do the same test with no assistance. the way it seems to be done in your country is a bit like a game of golf. the better ones are given a handicap! I have never understood the use of handicaps in golf. everyone should start at the same line, do the same work alone, or end up with false results.

Edited

It depends what sort of comparison you want your results to show.

The old idea was that exams are a direct comparison of innate intelligence or ability within a field, measured by asking people to perform an identical task in an exactly controlled condition.

The new idea of exams is to measure the maximum potential of a student to complete tasks in a method that suits them.

But the current system is (like a lot of our education) a bit of a mess of both. Education research and academia has moved on from no.1, but policy/government/teachers are hard to change, so only limited movement towards no.2 has happened. In some cases its actually moved back towards No.1, especially with the scrapping of coursework in favor of examinations.

Extra help in examinations are examples of small gains towards the new idea of examinations that have been achieved and cemented within the curriculum.

As for why Education academia thinks the second is more useful than the first approach - that is another big and interesting debate. Maybe for another thread.

Lillers · 12/05/2025 08:35

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/05/2025 08:14

@Bringmecookies25 sorry not understanding sats here. different country. but if trying to be equal is the way forward then surely everyone should start at the same time and do the same test with no assistance. the way it seems to be done in your country is a bit like a game of golf. the better ones are given a handicap! I have never understood the use of handicaps in golf. everyone should start at the same line, do the same work alone, or end up with false results.

Edited

I’ll use a really simple example.

Imagine a child has no arms. They are highly intelligent, excellent at maths, creative with their writing and can spell perfectly.

If they sit the test the same way as everyone else, the paper will be blank, and they will score zero.

Access arrangements would allow either someone to write for that child, or for them to dictate to a computer program that would write for them, thus assessing their ability to complete maths problems, or create a story (spellings and punctuation must also be dictated - it’s very difficult to do actually), or to show their understanding of something they have read.

It’s not a test of whether they can use their arms.

Bringmecookies25 · 12/05/2025 08:35

Lillers · 12/05/2025 08:35

I’ll use a really simple example.

Imagine a child has no arms. They are highly intelligent, excellent at maths, creative with their writing and can spell perfectly.

If they sit the test the same way as everyone else, the paper will be blank, and they will score zero.

Access arrangements would allow either someone to write for that child, or for them to dictate to a computer program that would write for them, thus assessing their ability to complete maths problems, or create a story (spellings and punctuation must also be dictated - it’s very difficult to do actually), or to show their understanding of something they have read.

It’s not a test of whether they can use their arms.

This would be my DC 🙈

OP posts:
Bringmecookies25 · 12/05/2025 08:38

ToffeePennie · 12/05/2025 08:20

“Better” children are not given a handicap. Children who struggle are given help to make it a level playing field. Some children struggle to do certain things in a certain timeframe that others can do easily. It’s about making it a fair representation of what that child can do.

I think the issue here is they are not “ better “ children.
My DC for example has no issue with doing long multiplication but can’t use their arm - so he is just as able in maths but wouldn’t be able to put it down on paper without someone writing for them.
a child who had full use of their arms and can do the same maths is NOT better

ps - they can’t play golf 🤣🤣🤣 great at picking things up with their feet though !

OP posts: