Should a Brain Surgeon be up at night with a baby doing night feeds ?

[Mondaytuesdayhappydays]

Should a surgeon working full time, operating on patients each day be up with a baby at night doing 2/3 hourly feeds.

If they were operating in your child and had had only 3/4 hours sleep each night over the last fortnight would this be acceptable to you?

Yes, my reckon is that that should be adequate.

'Staying elsewhere' good grief, what if they have insomnia?

What do you do when, after a year, baby is still waking numerous times a night, and both of you are brain surgeons?? Or other job where being sleep could have serious consequences.

When DS2 was born, I dumped all overnight care of the 23 month old to DH, and snuggled up with DS2 in the third bedroom. I got so much more sleep, because the newborn slept better than the fecking toddler.

Just sleep in random places around the place that miraculously pop up it seems

Been with my partner 9 years we still love each other beyond belief

The surgeon should either take time off work to help care for his/her child at night, or the other parent should be able to nap whenever possible to catch up on sleep (which generally requires staying at home or working relatively few hours.)

I didn’t expect DH to get up with our baby at night because he is a solicitor, and making mistakes in his field is very costly. I also had the chance to sleep when DD slept, so it felt fair to me.

I agree with the 😀 I also think when you've had a baby for some reason you can manage initially, maybe the first 6 or so months, I think it's something to do with post partum hormones and if you're breastfeeding that helps too. The body is a strange thing, it seems to give into some sort of mother survival mode.

I think the NHS has decent maternity benefits, so the baby should be into a decent sleep routine by the time she returns to work.

If you EBF you do every feed, all the time, there IS nobody to take over. The other parent can sleep all they want. I'm sure a Brain Surgeon has a spare bedroom.

I’d expect a surgeon to be able to pay for care to help their partner out. No it’s not acceptable. Same for any job where mistakes could kill. If you are the partner then why can’t grandparents, or a part time nanny help out? I’d expect more like shift work where the surgeon does a few hours then goes to bed and the other partner takes over.

You get a night NANNY. Two surgeons could afford this.

Maybe we could think about compulsory sterilisation of people with important jobs, a vow of chastity maybe. Or we could ban everyone from having children and farm them instead.

She may have to be, if the baby is breastfeeding.

No, I wouldn’t expect so in this case. However, I do think that on nights where they’re not on shift the next day (or however the shift pattern works), they should pick up their share of the parenting and catch up on some ZZZs in the morning/next available opportunity. Just not, for example, up 1-3am with baby and then starting an opp at 7am.

You would hope that they would be on maternity leave if this was the case, although I know some people breastfeed until quite late on. I think they should seriously consider switching to expressed bottles or formula in this scenario.

Perhaps in certain parts of the country. Doubtful in the South East with the high costs there and the amount of tax high earners have to pay.

I’d expect you to have a partner who can support you or for you to have wraparound care. Surely once you’re not on maternity leave anymore you aren’t still BFing through the night every 3 hours. If you were I’d expect pumping would be needed so you could actually rest. I’m shocked a surgeon wouldn’t be able to afford any help with care?!

No, the brain surgeon should be paying for a nanny to make sure their husband or wife gets plenty of sleep, since they obviously cannot do their job safely if they are tired.

I wouldn't worry about surgery, there are enough people in theatre to be watching what is done / not done.

The thing you need to worry about is when they are in clinic and making an error writing in your notes or giving you a prescription.

I would expect anyone who wants to become a parent to figure out a way to balance the demands of their job and their parenting role. That doesn’t mean leaving all the responsibility to the other parent. If they can’t figure out a solution, then they shouldn’t have a baby.

Actually an awful lot easier, at least you are not required to make complex judgments at 3am with a new born, neither do you need to get dressed. Honestly baby care is a walk in the park compared to being a junior Dr.

2 doctors takking about how people function on little sleep.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m002b6rs?partner=uk.co.bbc&origin=share-mobile

'Brain surgery? It's hardly Rocket Science, is it?'

Don't be ridiculous. Of course the brain surgeon should have slept well enough to do such an important job, unsure why their partner would feel disgruntled. It's getting to the stage I feel parents on MN aren't capable of doing night feeds on their own going by recent posts.

Tell your partner to quit their job so they can do night feeds, that way they're not risking their patients lives and everyone is happy.