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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To do my daughters GCSE course work?

387 replies

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:28

My daughter is adhd diagnosed, probable autism which she is still on a waiting list for years after the referral was submitted, she gets frustrated and gives up quickly, she tries, she really does, but sometimes gets overwhelmed and cant continue a task.

Her art GCSE course work is due in this week, she was very behind. I have spent all last weekend and this weekend helping her get it done. Up until now its been sitting and encouraging her, ive done some of the research whilst shes been doing the sketches needed, and then shes re-written it out, suggestions of sketches she could do, and cutting it all out so she can place everything into her book, helping her with layouts and ordering, but mostly just keeping her on track and focussed in 2 hour windows. There was one piece of art required for it to be done, she tried, for hours, yesterday to do it, but she got so frustrated and couldnt do it, its a portrait of a person. She ended up getting quite upset with the drawing and the looming deadline. This isnt the first time she has attempted it, shes been trying to draw it for weeks, but i put it to one side as she was hyperfixated on it, and in order to get everything else done, i took it off the table and said we would do that last. The sketch is needed as her final piece was based around this portrait, though her final piece was just shapes no details. The teacher has told her she absolutly must include this portrait in her project. Her final exam has already been sat so she cant just change the direction of the project now.

So ive drawn it, its not great, i can draw a bit but not even close to being skilled, but its better than what she was able to produce. She doesnt know ive drawn it last night. Ive started the shading to block out the main shadows, but it needs finishing, which she can do in the same way she has shaded all her other work, it looks vaguely like the person its supposed to be if you squint a little bit. We are going to try again today, ive even suggested to her tracing the facial structure today if we can figure a way to do it as we have no thin paper left to trace with, just really thick watercolour paper and card left. But it needs finishing today to hand in tomorrow. Then we can focus on her other much needed revision.

Her college plans do not include something even close to art related, its one drawing in amongst probably 100 others over the 2 years of project work, in the grand scheme of things i dont think it will make a difference to her grade, but her teacher has said it has to be included, so she is building it up to be the most important thing ever. I just want to help her, and ease some of her stress. Would you give her the drawing and help her finish it? Or is it too much help? Ive convinced myself if she does the shading then its no different to having traced the initial drawing, which is perfectly acceptable in her work, we just dont have the access to do that easily today. Do we try the tracing first and it that goes wrong then i just give her this one to shade over? theres a chance she has tried tracing in school on the lightboxes and they have been discarded already, as i know she traced other images.

How much help is too much, considering her SEN, but also that this is GCSE work?

OP posts:
araiwa · 05/05/2025 07:34

Cheating isn't cool

Maray1967 · 05/05/2025 07:35

I invigilated art GCSE at a local school on Friday pm - the final session of the practical exam, as far as I understand. Nothing could be taken home. The teachers all hammered this out in all three art rooms. We worked strictly to a time deadline. I’m surprised that your DD has the work at home.

MellowPinkDeer · 05/05/2025 07:35

All you’re teaching her is she can give up, someone else will fix it and there is no reason to bother

Poonu · 05/05/2025 07:36

Submit it, no judgement here. But accept that it's your work.

Oldfashioneddinosaur · 05/05/2025 07:36

Blimey, not a chance! Can you imagine if teachers get wind of you doing it?
I'd more be talking to her about what a ridiculous game GCSEs are and that it's just a hoop to be jumped through. If she doesn't submit it, she doesn't submit it. But deception probably isn't the way to go I don't think she'll thank you in the long term.

See if she'll have a go at drawing it upside down - it's amazing how much easier it is to get a good representation of something if we're copying what we are actually seeing rather than what we think we are seeing. Google "upside down drawing" or " drawing on the right side of the brain"

Tummybanana · 05/05/2025 07:36

This is too much help.

My DS had AuDHD and homework was a nightmare but I never did more than assist with organisation and very occasionally act as a scribe to his dictations.

Your DD has the whole of today to do this piece of work. Support her but do not rescue her.

Maray1967 · 05/05/2025 07:36

The most the teachers could do was give out requested art supplies or equipment. No other talking was allowed - certainly no guidance on how to improve the work. It surely cannot be right that parents are finishing off work at home.

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:37

Maray1967 · 05/05/2025 07:35

I invigilated art GCSE at a local school on Friday pm - the final session of the practical exam, as far as I understand. Nothing could be taken home. The teachers all hammered this out in all three art rooms. We worked strictly to a time deadline. I’m surprised that your DD has the work at home.

The deadline for their projects is this coming friday, however her last art lesson is tomorrow so the teacher wants them all finished for then. Her exams was 2 weeks before the deadline.

OP posts:
LoveWine123 · 05/05/2025 07:38

Why don’t you include the drawing she did even if it’s worse than yours. If her grade in art won’t matter. Don’t teach her someone will always save her.

ocelot3 · 05/05/2025 07:38

As someone with a DC with adhd I have done this. Frankly, working in this field and knowing the variation of help for students between one school and another, variation in the standard of what goes on in schools, and variations in marking nationally, I would say don’t stress and just work with her to get the job done. It’s one tiny part of a bigger picture. When you think of the variation in advantage that goes on between different children in different schools from different households along with access to tutors, the playing field is very far from level! The only issue is if she or you says anything to the school to raise this as an issue. It’s a nightmare for students working against the tide with SEN trying to get things like this done at home. I would say take the stress off this time and support. Maybe suggest ‘let’s try it this way and if you then want to do it yourself afterwards then you can do’ if you then feel more confident’ to ensure it is has been ‘her decision’. Then she at least has some something to hand in.

Zeitumschaltung · 05/05/2025 07:39

My mother did this for my siblings. They just fucked up later when they were adults and got hurt much more. I would leave it if I were you.

nearlyretired · 05/05/2025 07:39

If you have any greaseproof paper or baking parchment, that might work as tracing paper.

Happyinarcon · 05/05/2025 07:39

I used to, but just the bare minimum to get a pass mark. My daughter was moving out of school and into vocational training and we just needed to be done with it

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:39

Maray1967 · 05/05/2025 07:36

The most the teachers could do was give out requested art supplies or equipment. No other talking was allowed - certainly no guidance on how to improve the work. It surely cannot be right that parents are finishing off work at home.

Its not exam piece, its the prject leading up to it, which the teachers have given plenty of direction on, and shes done all the work up until now. She just cant draw a face that looks realistic.

OP posts:
Tummybanana · 05/05/2025 07:39

I mean you went too far when you did the research and she just wrote out your work tbh.

Meadowfinch · 05/05/2025 07:40

SEN is no excuse for submitting someone else's work and you know it.

I realise you want to help but your best bet is to nip out early and buy some tracing paper, then create a calm environment with all the things she needs. Clear away any clutter and distractions.

Then break the task down into small sections. Trace the outline and have a break, add detail and have a snack, Sit with her and draw something unrelated, yourself to try to get her to relax.

Reassure her that it's only on piece in hundreds and not the only thing that counts.

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:40

LoveWine123 · 05/05/2025 07:38

Why don’t you include the drawing she did even if it’s worse than yours. If her grade in art won’t matter. Don’t teach her someone will always save her.

because they are all now screwed up and binned after she got very upset trying to do it yesterday.

OP posts:
Zeitumschaltung · 05/05/2025 07:41

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:39

Its not exam piece, its the prject leading up to it, which the teachers have given plenty of direction on, and shes done all the work up until now. She just cant draw a face that looks realistic.

Sorry wrong thread

moanafan · 05/05/2025 07:43

Art teacher here. If this is her exam project and she’s already sat the timed sessions (10 hours at GCSE to complete the final outcome for the project) then she cannot work on this project after that time. So if she’s taken the project home to finish this is malpractice. If the teacher has allowed her to take the project home, you need to report her as this is absolutely not allowed. The whole cohort could be disqualified from the qualification if this has happened.

If this is a different project to the exam one, then she CAN still be working on this. However, Art projects are marked holistically, so it’s very difficult to say that one particular sketch is so vitally important and must be included - Art is a journey, and the assessment objectives are looked at throughout the project. If the sketch is an important part of that journey then it is important but not necessarily essential to gaining the marks?

I’m not convinced your daughters teacher is correctly following guidelines set out by the exam board by the sounds of this!

Kindnesscostsnothingtryit · 05/05/2025 07:43

Do you know what her predicted grade is? If you helping her gets her a 4/pass then I'd do it, if you're trying to bump her up to a high grade then I'd leave it.

LoveWine123 · 05/05/2025 07:43

LolaLouise · 05/05/2025 07:40

because they are all now screwed up and binned after she got very upset trying to do it yesterday.

She needs to take responsibility for her project and do it again. Even if it’s not great. At the moment she is paralysed with fear and anxiety (I have been your daughter on many occasions). You will not do her a favour if you help her cheat. She has to face her anxiety and do the work herself as that’s the only way she will get better at managing these things and develop strategies to cope with her feelings.

UName38 · 05/05/2025 07:43

of course not OK.
Even if it was never discovered but you and your daughter will know that the GCSE is even in small part yours - maybe the marks that got from one grade to a higher one.

If your daughter has SEN that warrant adjustment then you could have asked about this for exam board to decide whether that should happen.

shouldhavedonethisearlier · 05/05/2025 07:44

Don't steal the struggle. Its not the grade that will matter, it's what she learns along the way. Support by giving her the encouragement and the tools she needs to complete the task. Meadowfinch (up thread) has good advice.

EleanorReally · 05/05/2025 07:45

dont do it
ask for an extension

RareGoalsVerge · 05/05/2025 07:45

I understand what you are going through, my y11 child is diagnosed Autism&ADHD and the coursework (which was handed in a couple of weeks ago) has certainly been a nightmare. We didn't have Art, but 2 other creative subjects with a significant amount of coursework.

I haven't voted as it's not a simple yabu/yanbu as your instinct to help your child us totally understable but here's a few points:

  • remember that your DD will have to sign a document declaring that what she is submitting is all her own work. Think about how that will impact her in the future.
  • check the exam board document for their criteria. The teacher may be right that this sketch is crucial for securing a high grade but maybe it's not crucial for securing a pass? In the subjects we were dealing with, a coursework submission that shows the real thought process that went in to the final piece was good enough, even if it was missing some of the finer detail.
  • When we were approaching the deadline we acknowledged that there were some points on thr teacher's list of "what's missing" that we would not achieve, and that's ok. We do not need to aim for a grade 9 in every subject.

With the main exams starting in just a few days, it's really not the best use of your DD's time to worry about something that may only determine which side of the 5-6 or 6-7 or 7-8 boundary your DD slots in to when actually any grade of 5+ is totally fine.