Page 3 | Things in-laws do to annoy you.

Pinkjellyunicorn · 2025-04-22T18:01:39+00:00

I could write a book I swear. My in-laws have a different mother tounge. My husband understands all and speaks a little due to moving to UK age 10. My in-laws constantly talk in a different language in my house, whilst sat at my Christmas dinner table, sometimes screaming and shouting at each other in a forgein language. Husband doesn’t let us or DC go there as it’s filthy (and some other reasons but that’s a whole other post) so we are stuck with them here. AIBU think this is damn right rude? Please make me feel better with your woes 🤣

Intheway · 23/04/2025 08:02

MereNoelle · 22/04/2025 20:21

My in laws don’t annoy me at all. My parents on the other hand…

Me too!

And actually, aren't these the same people, in-laws are parents…I wonder what makes them so different….

Bingbopboomboomboombopbam · 23/04/2025 08:55

Lazlothevampire · 23/04/2025 07:50

Fuck knows. They see nothing wrong with it. My husband doesn’t either.

They used to come and visit and bring food, which I would throw away when they left. They would bring a chicken that they had cooked 2 days prior to visiting, which would have just been left out on the side, or in the oven, and tell me it would be great for a week of dc packed lunches.

If dh had his way, he would still be making spaghetti sauce/chilli/curry and leaving it out on the hob for 5 days, reheating whenever he wanted some.

Parents in law are Italian. Every week is a huge pot of chicken pasta sauce that’s left for 5 days on the hob. FIL is convinced that the more times it’s heated up, the healthier it becomes. God, can you imagine the bacteria 🤢🤢

I am the crazy one for portioning thins up and keeping in the fridge for a maximum of 3 days, freezing the any surplus to that. That’s madness, apparently. It was a dealbreaker for me when dh and I first lived together. I am not eating a chicken sauce that’s been left out at room temperature and constantly reheated for 5 days.

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Oh my godddddddddddd

I wonder where on earth they picked that up. I’m not Italian but also southern European, this is…. Unusual, at best 😭

Autumn38 · 23/04/2025 09:02

Nah I don’t get irritated by my in-laws. DH does though. And DH can tolerate my parents perfectly well whilst I silently seeth with annoyance at them 😂.

goodness, we’ve got small children now and I dread to think what they’ll think of us when they are adults. Some of these stories are bonkers though and I hope to be able to avoid being thought of as totally horrific 😂😬

saltwater1985 · 23/04/2025 09:04

thepariscrimefiles · 23/04/2025 07:47

Why are they coming on holiday with you? You should have said no. They sound like shit grandparents so you will get no benefit from them being there.

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Because DP panders to them. I certainly won’t be babysitting them, I’ve already said I’m not driving down the night before to pick them up, he can if he wants and the kids and I will drive to the airport separately on the day and meet them there.
I think he thinks he’s entitled to invite them as he’s paying (for our share) so it’s his holiday iykwim.
Theres more to it obviously and I’m really not feeling the love for DP atm, this is an extra annoyance.

BernardButlersBra · 23/04/2025 09:18

MereNoelle · 22/04/2025 20:21

My in laws don’t annoy me at all. My parents on the other hand…

I find my mother way more annoying as well!

But the in-laws:
-never close the front door behind them ever at my house. Super helpful when we have pets and 2 toddlers. Maybe l should start doing the same at their house
-never offer you a drink at their house
-reluctant to change heavily stained dining room tablecloth. It's not old stains, definitely newer stains which clumps of food on

BernardButlersBra · 23/04/2025 09:19

WingingIt101 · 22/04/2025 20:37

When visiting, FIL will act like he needs to bow and scrape in my presence. He doesn’t need to do this and it makes me very on edge. It’s farcical and I used to half expect hidden cameras gauging my reaction. I’ve only ever told him to make himself at home.

MIL goes so far the other way that’s also comical - I say make yourself at home, I don’t mean put your feet up
wearing the shoes you’ve just come in wearing on my new sofa.

acting like they are practically related to the king and nobody else knows how to behave properly.

outstaying their welcome (that one’s not exclusive to them to be fair)

ignoring the washing up “system” - we put dirty mugs / spoons etc in the sink whilst waiting to be washed or put in the dishwasher, and use the draining board for, well, draining washed items. They insist on adding dirty cups and spoons to the draining board.

Who puts dirty items on the draining board?! The clue is in the name!

Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 12:37

Bingbopboomboomboombopbam · 23/04/2025 07:38

Trust me when you’re speaking a second language all day every day, it’s an enormous relief to finally just relax and speak your own.

I feel like you posted about this before though, or maybe someone in similar circumstances! Are they Italian?

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Hello! No I’ve not posted about in laws before - not European at all.

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Bingbopboomboomboombopbam · 23/04/2025 12:38

@Pinkjellyunicorn oh god it must be a thing in in-laws then. I wonder if there’s some passive aggressiveness on their part going on.

curious79 · 23/04/2025 12:41

Current in laws? Nothing. Nice people, socially awkward but kind so that's no bother.

But my former MiL - awful! enabler of her son's terrible behaviour. One of those MiLs who thinks they're helping you with a newborn by taking it off you so you're free to do the washing up

Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 12:42

AliBaliBee1234 · 23/04/2025 07:42

I wonder if any of your parents similarly annoy your other halves hmmm

My parents drive DH mad sometimes! But he often says he would have x2 of mine over his anyday. He knows that as annoying as being over clean and financially strict is - he would rather we have my parents life than his parents life.

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Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 12:53

thepariscrimefiles · 23/04/2025 07:54

They don't flush the toilet?? Why on earth not? Are they deliberately disrespecting you?

What does your DH think about their behaviour? I would stop inviting them to your home. They sound absolutely horrible.

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DH loses it constantly with them. I have no idea how he has turned out so wonderful. FIL once dropped a whole toilet roll on top of a toilet full of off S*T, pulled it out, put it in the sink covered in S*T and left it there for me to find. When I walked in the house after being out I instantly thought we had had a sewage burst. They are constant 🙈

A poster further up mentioned childcare - and that’s exactly it. They come on the school holidays when we need them. DC isn’t old enough for holiday clubs and holiday childminders non existent here. We are away May half term and have used AL. Hoping we won’t have to have them again until end of June 🙈 for DC birthday.

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Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 13:03

Also this thread has been amazing therapy. I don’t moan too much to my friends and family as it feels disloyal. DH and I have a giggle and make jokes when it’s just us about the antics that have gone on. Luckily DH gets way more annoyed than me- telling me think myself lucky I’ve had a decade of this in comparison to his whole life of this chaos. Please keep crazy in-laws stories going, it’s making me laugh in this difficult time 🤣🤣🤣

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TimeToMixItUp3 · 23/04/2025 13:04

Say how unfair it is that my family was so involved but they made no effort to arrange to see us or make any suggestions. And when I offered to visit I was told no. 🤣 What do you want from me?!

TimeToMixItUp3 · 23/04/2025 13:06

And totally took sides when we divorced, complete shut down and refusal to speak to me. Despite their son being the one that has an affair and left us for months.

saveforthat · 23/04/2025 13:09

This thread is awful. I hope a MIL starts a thread soon on all the things DIL/SIL do to annoy them.

BernardButlersBra · 23/04/2025 13:10

@Pinkjellyunicorn the toilet roll story is especially vile. All l can think is both MIL and FIL both have grim habits so they no longer realise what's normal and what's disgusting? When my husband does something grim then l pull him up about it. I shouldn't have but then again he shouldn't do grim things!

Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 13:10

Bingbopboomboomboombopbam · 23/04/2025 12:38

@Pinkjellyunicorn oh god it must be a thing in in-laws then. I wonder if there’s some passive aggressiveness on their part going on.

There is some definite jealousy issues going on. I come from very working class backgrounds whose parents have done amazingly investing in property (commercial before anyone has a go) and have made an affluent life for themselves, where IL had £100k+ salaries 15 years ago and are facing bankruptcy. My dad retired on £30k a year day job salary and it’s his side hustles that have got them where they are.
resent that we can afford nice multiple holidays, and that my parents gave money towards house deposit, new cars, weddings, put me and siblings through uni with no debt, paid DH student finance off to help us get our mortgage. I feel for them for being compared but they continue to make stupid decisions over and over 🙈

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Original poster

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 13:13

BernardButlersBra · 23/04/2025 13:10

@Pinkjellyunicorn the toilet roll story is especially vile. All l can think is both MIL and FIL both have grim habits so they no longer realise what's normal and what's disgusting? When my husband does something grim then l pull him up about it. I shouldn't have but then again he shouldn't do grim things!

DH in the past has had some skewed ideas of hygiene. We have talked about it and used his close female friends to discuss and back up it is infact grim. He is open to discussion and change- unlike them. He really has broke the mold.

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Daisyvodka · 23/04/2025 13:25

saveforthat · 23/04/2025 13:09

This thread is awful. I hope a MIL starts a thread soon on all the things DIL/SIL do to annoy them.

Interested to hear all of the behaviour on this thread that you think is perfectly reasonable, it must be a lot of it for you to write off the entire thread?

MereNoelle · 23/04/2025 13:29

Pinkjellyunicorn · 23/04/2025 12:53

DH loses it constantly with them. I have no idea how he has turned out so wonderful. FIL once dropped a whole toilet roll on top of a toilet full of off S*T, pulled it out, put it in the sink covered in S*T and left it there for me to find. When I walked in the house after being out I instantly thought we had had a sewage burst. They are constant 🙈

A poster further up mentioned childcare - and that’s exactly it. They come on the school holidays when we need them. DC isn’t old enough for holiday clubs and holiday childminders non existent here. We are away May half term and have used AL. Hoping we won’t have to have them again until end of June 🙈 for DC birthday.

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So they’re fine for free childcare, but nothing else?

Mumble12 · 23/04/2025 13:32

My (thankfully now ex) MIL cannot tell a story without saying "wasn't it Keven", "Didn't I Keven", "Haven't you Keven" throughout the entire thing.

IT DROVE ME MAD

cherrymaoam · 23/04/2025 13:40

My MIL likes to tell me about my FIL’s latest bowel movements.

”Derek was terribly constipated this morning”

😖

Flossflower · 23/04/2025 14:09

CurlewKate · 22/04/2025 20:35

How very dare they speak a foreign language!

If you can speak the same language as your host it would be polite to do so.

Catsandcannedbeans · 23/04/2025 14:34

I love them both but neither of them will admit they need a hearing aid so I’m constantly shouting and they have the TV on super loud. Also MIL always buys me really cringy live laugh love style signs. I do put them up when she comes but I do not have the heart or balls to tell her I don’t live laugh love them :(.

Peach0123 · 23/04/2025 14:37

WingingIt101 · 22/04/2025 20:37

When visiting, FIL will act like he needs to bow and scrape in my presence. He doesn’t need to do this and it makes me very on edge. It’s farcical and I used to half expect hidden cameras gauging my reaction. I’ve only ever told him to make himself at home.

MIL goes so far the other way that’s also comical - I say make yourself at home, I don’t mean put your feet up
wearing the shoes you’ve just come in wearing on my new sofa.

acting like they are practically related to the king and nobody else knows how to behave properly.

outstaying their welcome (that one’s not exclusive to them to be fair)

ignoring the washing up “system” - we put dirty mugs / spoons etc in the sink whilst waiting to be washed or put in the dishwasher, and use the draining board for, well, draining washed items. They insist on adding dirty cups and spoons to the draining board.

No the draining board thing! My DP and his whole family do this (that's if they ever try to put thier own cups in the kitchen).
The draining board is right above the dishwasher too, I just don't get it. Drives me nuts.