This amount of Easter eggs

[Pinkbleach]

To get straight into it - I get my children 10 Easter eggs each every Easter .

When I started it years ago , it was very cheap. I don’t get the huge ones . Years ago I could get one or 2 big ( the ones that are now medium ) and then the little ones ( they had more packaging and more in them ) and I would spend £20.

It all stems from my son’s autism , he is a young adult now. I’ve always said that birthday and Christmas is at least 10 presents and 10 eggs at Easter . It’s usually more at Christmas but it has became a security thing - he knows he’s getting at least 10 presents ( he does not care about the price , he’s not spoiled . I could get his main present and then 9 things from the pound shop ) .

I have had comments about it being too much . I don’t get gifts and balloon arches or anything like that. My youngest never eats them all , he barely touches them and we eat a lot of them 🤣 but I can’t get him less. Usually at the end of half term we melt the uneaten eggs and make cakes - so that’s an activity for a day of the holidays - , the uneaten chocolates all end up in a box for anyone to have.

For info - this is what I spent.

I got 2 of the “ 2 for £9” eggs , the bigger ones. So they have one each of those. Usually I get some medium and some small but as the small were £1.50 ( and I left it late so couldn’t find any anyway) but the medium were £2.30 in Asda I didn’t bother with the small. So I then got 4 for £12 ( 2 each ) then they had 7 each of the £2.30 ones . I spent £53 in total , so £26.50 each . Usually it’s less as I grab the smaller ones when they’re on offer in Morrisons , it just happened that I left it late this year.

Yes, it’s a lot on chocolate . But I see people getting hampers and balloons etc .

Is this really over the top ?

I suspect most get less than half of that. One from parents, one each from people they may see over Easter (grandparents, uncles, aunts etc ) and something differently shaped like a packet of mini eggs, Kit Kat bunnies, Creme eggs etc

I did read about your child having very definite ideas about what constitutes an Easter egg - it’s based on what I’ve seen and experienced.

Alongside balloon arches that are a killer for the environment. Don’t fall for all the consumerism.

It is a lot but then I can’t talk, each of mine had 5 eggs this year (except for the baby) and there is still mountains of Easter chocolate and it was ridiculously expensive.

We were going to take them to a hunt but weather was supposed to be bad so ended up last minute trying to buy enough eggs so it’d be fair and they could have some sort of hunt… 15 eggs in total 🤦🏻‍♀️

I am also guilty of counting Xmas gifts, to make sure it’s fair 😬

So no YANBU 🤣

PS I have ND children, you start the process early possibly months before explaining why there will be less presents at Xmas/Easter etc. Just cos a child is ND doesn’t mean they cannot be explained to.

10 isn't even wildly out of average for most kids with grandparents and aunts anyway.

Both my kids had the below

Son had
6 eggs (all different sizes)
2 boxes of lindors
1 box of sweets
2 cups of fizzy sweets
3 x packs of squishies
1 x mystery fidget bag
£10

daughter had
8 eggs (different sizes)
1kg bag mini eggs
Large mini eggs bar
Aero milky bar
1 Bag of easter brownies
£10

I don't consider the above a lot at all, They have 2 sets of grandparents, 3 sets of aunties that all buy for them.
They wont be eating it all in one go, it will last a while.

I went into Sainsbury's yesterday and the eggs were on pallets in the corner of the shop. The prices weren't reduced on the labels, but the self scanner showed that they were less than half price.

Could you wait until Easter Monday and then buy nine of the £1.50 eggs for 75p?

This. If it works then it’s nobody else’s business. Parenting strategies for ND kids are necessarily different.

Mum to an autistic child. This is so very reasonable. It's such a minimal thing to do to make sure that the day goes happily for everyone. Yes, it's a lot of chocolate. But it's eaten over time, it's all used in some way, and you can afford it. You're not flaunting the consumption or going bigger and bigger every year. You're just... Having a nice Easter.

I don't know your DS's presentation or abilities, but if you did want to change things, might talking to him about "resetting" Easter, away from the day itself, work? Coming up with a new plan together? But really, your DS has to manage so much change every day, requiring energy that many people will never appreciate. You pick your battles. Keeping Easter the same and having a bit too much chocolate in the house for a few weeks is such a non problem.

This!
You're doing what you need to do, it’s not like you’re showing off for Instagram or whatever.

My DS used to get given a fair few at Easter from family and the neighbourhood old ladies as he was the only baby in the area at that time.

i kept them in the cupboard and gave them out over the next few weeks, tbh me and his Ddad finished them as DS got fed up with them!

We all do what we do to get by, don’t worry OP.🌺

10 definitely seems like a lot. Especially as one child is now a young adult, and the other doesn't give a shiny shit.

Autism or not, can they understand that 10 is just too expensive these days?

Nothing to do with me enjoying it . As explained before , to him - Easter eggs come in boxes

The point is it's not just about this one thing it's not just about a 'test'. The tantrum over this is worth it because it's part of learning the wider lesson that he cannot always have what he wants, however upsetting that may be.

In life there will be lots of times that much as you want to give in to him it will be outside your control and if anything you are making it less and less likely as he gets older that he will be able to cope with not getting exactly what he wants, all the time.

You have an opportunity here to start work on this. Easter Sunday is at home. It's not in a public place where a tantrum might be embarrassing etc, it's not during school hours or anything like this.

Are you never going to gently teach him that despite his autism it won't be possible for him to always have what his wants, in the way he wants him?

Gently OP - You're asking people here... Many of whom have no real understanding of ASD....

As you say, it's not about them pigging out on lorry loads of chocolate - it's making their world calm and predictable!

PS love the activity of melted chocolate cakes👍

Continue to have a lovely life!

There won’t be a tantrum , there will be a meltdown . Massive difference .

I have no issue buying them , so I’m not going to change it

So why did you post then

As I have said repeatedly , to see if other people thought it extravagant.

Most do, I didn’t. Now I’m seeing maybe it is. I didn’t post so that if people voted it was that I would stop doing it , just to see if it actually is .

You’re right . Thank you for a lovely response 😌

Op is your son 16/18? Judging by the comments you made around what he's unable to access compared to other dc of the same age, he is. Have you been doing this egg tradition for years?

Yes , I do teach him. There are lots of things he wants and I don’t give in to everything .

But to me , this isn’t a big deal - it isn’t something that is stressful for me to do and it isn’t something I can’t continue so I’m happy to do it , to keep him calm and happy and able to deal with the holiday.

It isn’t about other people seeing the “ tantrum “ ( respectfully please do not call autistic meltdowns tantrums because they are not , he has no control over them and it’s not a reaction to not getting what he wants is his natural response to something he cannot deal with ) - I couldn’t care less about that . It’s about what it does to him when it happens . He is exhausted after, it makes him think he will never be able to live a normal life , it makes him think there is something wrong with him and he also physically hurts himself. I am not going to cause that just to save myself a few pound - when I don’t care about spending it in the first place .

Yes he is and yes I have been doing this for many , many years .

Thank you .

I never post - I’m not one to post photos of presents on Christmas Eve or Easter eggs . This isn’t about being judged but I just have people on my social media that I know struggle a lot and I just don’t like to post these things and feel like A- I’m bragging or B - making a parent feel less of a parent because they don’t have the same amount .

Your money your choice. Any one else opionion is irrelevant.

If it works for you ignore eveyone else.

I get critised by IL for buying so many presents at Chrstams and birthdays - but they don't get stuff all year like some kids - a lot is second hand and/or useful or even pocket money.

Thing is DH an only child says we don't get that much more than they did for him though we probably spend less per child.

I think you have said that hopefully he might consider money in the future, if not rather than 10 eggs would 10 gifts be something he would consider? You say for Christmas you can pad that out to make up the number, so could you get a couple of eggs and then maybe things he needs like socks, deodorant etc and even put into a refillable egg? Or must it be chocolate?

It does sound crazy having so much chocolate, especially as it doesn't get eaten and the fact you try to equal it out with siblings getting the same, but I can see why you do it.

This. Ignore people who don't understand if it works for you and your children.