Page 5 | "Ipad Kid" ??

Becc91 · 2025-04-19T21:08:16+00:00

Worried I'm going to be grilled for this 🙈... But has anyone else noticed that whenever you go out to eat there always seems to be a sticky toddler with an i pad?! After seeing this for a 3rd time this week , complete with spaghetti hoops on the screen , a nasty cough and vacant parents who could care less - one of whom was ON THEIR PHONE 😱 i made what I thought was a reasonable request to turn off the loud video of dancing fruits , only to be looked at like I'd grown a 3rd head?!?! DS (19) typically embarrassed- says I was out of order , but I just can't understand the laziness of it all.Is it just me?😲

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 20/04/2025 06:46

mumofoneAlonebutokay · 19/04/2025 23:18

Okay so an hour, although probably less at a restaurant - parents are exhausted and need a break sometimes

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And do you offer to pay the bill for all the people whose meal you ruined by allowing your child to disrupt the atmosphere with their noisy screen for that hour?

LlynTegid · 20/04/2025 06:47

Reasonable request, headphones or even low volume. I doubt the phone call was to make arrangements or had to be at the time it was.

Unfortunately with low margins in many parts of hospitality, the option of not serving such parents is not realistic.

ButterCrackers · 20/04/2025 06:49

It’s really sad. Colouring in costs just paper and crayons but I’ve not seen kids doing this for years. I saw a kid on his dad’s shoulders out for a walk watching a cartoon on an iPad. I thought poor kid missing out. It’s the same for iPads in cars, trains etc for travel there’s a disconnection to the experience and to drawing, reading, conversation - even for toddlers.

ChicaWowWow · 20/04/2025 06:55

I think it's unreasonable to judge the use of screen - you don't know the circumstances and that's only a snapshot of their day/life.

It's NOT unreasonable however to ask for the sound down. That's such a nuisance! We used headphones or sound off.

dimsiaradcymraeg · 20/04/2025 07:02

No excuses for it. Stop with the exhausted parents rubbish. News flash - we’re all exhausted parents. Deal with it! Baring any severe SEN needs (mum of child with SEN), there is no excuse. You wanted kids, raise them. You sit and chat and engage with your children. It’s how they learn to grow and develop social skills.

We’ve had to move tables before now because a large group of adults allowed their young kids free rein to watch Peppa Pig at the table (must have been 8pm too). There were at least six of them and the parents had just pushed them to one end (next to us) so they could enjoy their evening.

Another time, in a lovely restaurant. Out for a romantic meal and we had three kids sat practically on our feet for watching their iPad while their parents sat the other end of the table.

I’ve taken to littering my conversation with swearing. It’s great for kids to expand their vocabulary 😬 parents quickly pop on headphone or actually take them home!

JeremiahBullfrog · 20/04/2025 07:06

I dread to think what the world's going to be like in 10 years when we are flooded with adults who have never been taught to regulate boredom.

Saw on another thread a parent blaming her son's bad behaviour at school on some of his teachers not being interesting enough. It's not going to go down well when he has an actual job if he starts acting up whenever he isn't enjoying himself!

Pricelessadvice · 20/04/2025 07:08

I have no problem with a child on screen in a restaurant. Rather that than them running up and down the place like a lot of kids do.
I do think sounds should be turned down though.

MyUmberSeal · 20/04/2025 07:09

JeremiahBullfrog · 20/04/2025 07:06

I dread to think what the world's going to be like in 10 years when we are flooded with adults who have never been taught to regulate boredom.

Saw on another thread a parent blaming her son's bad behaviour at school on some of his teachers not being interesting enough. It's not going to go down well when he has an actual job if he starts acting up whenever he isn't enjoying himself!

The world has gone to shit. It really has.

OutandAboutMum1821 · 20/04/2025 07:12

YANBU OP.

I cannot stand anyone being on iPads or iPhones during meals at home or out in restaurants. It is incredibly bad mannered, both to the people you are with and others around you. I noticed recently a man blaring music from his phone sitting outside a pub restaurant- a good song actually 😂 but I did wonder why he couldn’t use headphones?

I take my own children, who are 3 and 6, out to cafes/restaurants regularly, and I have never allowed this. I didn’t allow any iPad use at all even at home until my son was asked to use some Maths apps for homework in Year 1.

How on earth do my children cope without them in restaurants? 😂 Like I did- they have a colouring book and actually talk to their family. I have taught them questions to ask others to show interest, and they understand recent news to share, things they’ve been doing, etc.

This is not being judgmental, this is having high standards of your behaviour, and children will certainly rise to this.

Sheeparelooseagain · 20/04/2025 07:19

"I cannot stand anyone being on iPads or iPhones during meals at home or out in restaurants."

How is it bothering you if the sound is off. Surely you wouldn't notice if you were concentrating on the people you were with.

Strictlymad · 20/04/2025 07:19

lovemetomybones · 19/04/2025 22:56

My child is autistic, globally delayed and finds public places incredibly overwhelming, scary and stressful. On the rare occasion we do go out, my child will probably NEED a form of technology to block out all the difficulties that my child faces. The sound is low or off visual is enough, my child cannot wear anything on their head. The smallest things to us, makes a huge difference to them. It’s not a form of babysitting, it’s not plugging them in, it’s a coping mechanism for my child to be in public. Oh and if you really want to judge… they have a dummy too!!!

you have absolutely no idea of story of these children. Let them be. Be kind. That kindness and acceptance might absolutely make their week.

Today I had people stare due to my child breaking down in a supermarket, because they couldn’t stand the feeling of the metal seat in the trolley on their legs. We also had to wait for a lengthy time for some service, the combination was soooo challenging. But we survived it! Because that’s what you do when you are a mum of a disabled child, you fire fight constantly in broad daylight, doing ‘normal’ tasks which every other person takes for granted. Those who tutted and stared and one person even had this face like they chewed on a wasp. I hope you never have to walk a day in my shoes!

luckily my autism means I quite frankly don’t give a monkeys about what you think of me or my parenting, but others don’t have a rhino hide like me and your judgement can be crushing.

be kind.

I’m in a similar position, with my eldest she sat nicely etc and i would sit pretty smugly (to my now eternal shame) then I had ds who has brain damage and is most likely autistic (he’s still quite little) and yes an iPad is often the only way to get through an activity out of his routine, he’s laid under the trolley at the supermarket, howled his head off getting in the car seat etc. should I not leave the house? Should I shout and scream back at him til he obeys? Or should I help him stay calm and access this other activities wit his iPad and then remove it as he becomes more comfortable

Stickortwigs · 20/04/2025 07:19

Eachpeachpearprune · 20/04/2025 06:30

It has never escalated to screens for us. What’s wrong with a bit of colouring in whilst waiting for dinner…!? It’s not the same as at home - it’s a much longer wait to order, wait for food, wait for dessert etc where mine can eventually get a bit antsy so we bring colouring for them to do whilst they’re waiting (and chatting to us!)

Edited

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Oh I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it whatsoever. I just meant that we find it easier and the children more settled if we provide no ‘entertainment’ while eating out.

Workhardcryharder · 20/04/2025 07:19

“Safe and nourished” is quite literally the bare minimum

Barrenfieldoffucks · 20/04/2025 07:21

DragonBalls · 19/04/2025 22:23

It’s obviously not just you as this topic comes up every few days or so 🤷‍♀️

Agreed. The "is it just me" posts are so yawnsome.

Strictlymad · 20/04/2025 07:21

JeremiahBullfrog · 20/04/2025 07:06

I dread to think what the world's going to be like in 10 years when we are flooded with adults who have never been taught to regulate boredom.

Saw on another thread a parent blaming her son's bad behaviour at school on some of his teachers not being interesting enough. It's not going to go down well when he has an actual job if he starts acting up whenever he isn't enjoying himself!

Whilst i semi agree we can’t put all kids under the same umbrella- my nt child I say yes sitting quietly for 5 mins won’t kill you, my most likely nd toddler needs help to manage new situations that cause immense stress and anxiety

Wwe175 · 20/04/2025 07:23

Stickortwigs · 19/04/2025 22:45

I never take books, toys or colouring to a restaurant. It sets the expectation that the children need to be entertained, which escalates to screens.

You wouldn’t have them at home, so we stick to the same format. Also don’t eat out later than the usual routine so children aren’t tired and restless.

But eating out isn’t the same as at home. Last Sunday eating out, we waited 45 minutes for our food to come. It’s a big ask for children to sit there all that time.

DancefloorAcrobatics · 20/04/2025 07:23

I work in a public place, the number of DC following their parents holding a screen is uncanny.
Makes me sad as surely DC fail to engage with their environment and getting a sense of direction.

SuperTrooper14 · 20/04/2025 07:26

SallySue87 · 19/04/2025 22:35

As it goes, my DS doesn’t like the feeling of headphones. So I will NOT. Force him to do something he is uncomfortable with for other peoples comfort 😠

Right, so if someone was doing something that your DS hated and was disturbing him, you’d just leave them to GET ON WITH IT? Course you would. 🙄

Mamabear487 · 20/04/2025 07:27

Your pathetic. Keep your nose out of other peoples business

Bert2025 · 20/04/2025 07:31

SallySue87 · 19/04/2025 22:35

As it goes, my DS doesn’t like the feeling of headphones. So I will NOT. Force him to do something he is uncomfortable with for other peoples comfort 😠

Is this a reverse?
I DON’T like hearing tinny repetitive annoying music while I am eating my meal that I have paid for in a public shared space so if your DS can’t eat without an iPad maybe he should eat at home.

Sheeparelooseagain · 20/04/2025 07:31

Noisy tech is annoying but so is the crass boasting on this thread.

abracadabra1980 · 20/04/2025 07:34

It is my unpopular opinion that a very high percentage of adults are addicted their phones. I myself, have noticed with alarm, that if I sit down in the evening and do not have my phone next to me, I can't relax. Ten years ago, this would not have bothered me in the slightest. I absolutely hate it and I wonder whether this has anything to do with my attention span being almost non-existent these days. I'm not a social media addict, I'm more an information addict and have to be looking up things constantly. I also run a business which requires multiple checking of data on a daily basis.
If I'm watching TV (or more often YouTube) I have noticed that as soon as an ad break comes on, I reach for my phone as I can't stand the 2? mins of boredom.
I have terrible text neck pain from scrolling, but my laptop isn't with me as much as my phone.
I don't look at my phone when out socially and nor do my children (now adults). It's a massive 21st century problem we all need to address. How, I'm not quite sure. I'd happily go back to my Nokia un-smart phone, but how to do business with that?

Mishmashs · 20/04/2025 07:37

I don’t really understand the assumption that if you don’t give a kid a screen they’ll be running up and down the restaurant causing chaos or not allowing their parents to eat! I’m not the world’s best parent but ours have never had screens when out eating. We chat (verbal games like Would you Rather or I spy), sometimes play cards (Uno or quick games with a deck of cards), if the table is big enough they might draw or eg last night on a long overnight ferry journey my daughter wrote her diary and my son wrote the top ten things about the holiday we just had. Yes my husband and I don’t get loads of chance for adult chat but I wouldn’t expect that necessarily when taking kids out to eat with us. And my son is autistic.

Mishmashs · 20/04/2025 07:39

Saying all that I do think it’s fine for children with extra needs to use screens to either entertain or block out the environment. If it allows the parents to eat.

Wardrobehanger · 20/04/2025 07:42

Stickortwigs · 19/04/2025 22:45

I never take books, toys or colouring to a restaurant. It sets the expectation that the children need to be entertained, which escalates to screens.

You wouldn’t have them at home, so we stick to the same format. Also don’t eat out later than the usual routine so children aren’t tired and restless.

I’d say they do need entertaining (or at least occupying) if you are waiting quite a while for food though. At home surely you wouldn’t expect them to sit at a table for an hour before eating?
We used to take a bit of colouring or stickers and a card game or play games like Granny went to market.
We also asked for the kids meals to come at the same time as the adults’ starters.
I can’t hand on heart say we never resorted to giving them our phones if they were fractious but it was never for long, always on silent and all entertainment’ was put away as soon as food arrived.
I used to (and still do!) enjoy eating out with my kids and feel like this is one aspect of parenting we did quite well at!

I do know quite a few families whose kids use iPads during all meals including at home. It’s like they are conditioned to not be able to eat without them. It’s a strange experience eating with them!