Would you judge someone for choosing to have a c section?

[ProudOtter]

I’m just curious as to why you would judge someone for choosing to have an elective c section?

For background I’ve decided I’d like to ask for a c section for baby number 2. Some people have made comments about me being insane, or that I’m missing out of giving birth “properly”

I am curious as to why some people have this view.

My first born was semi elective c section, was rushed into an induction due to minor fetal distress and escalated a bit so had to choice to attempt vaginal birth or go for a C-section and I chose the c section. Positive experience and no regrets.

I don’t but op asked if i would judge and i would. It’s none of my business so i wouldn’t comment on it or think too much about it but without a reason
i would think “why”

OK, thanks for explaining.
So, women with smaller birth canals and babies with bigger heads would need to die in vaginal birth to preserve the feature of smaller head/bigger pelvis or birth canals.

Same goes for literally any other health intervention - it all goes against natural selection.

If the woman is a first time parent, a hospital transfer is more likely. Which wouldn't be required if they were already at the hospital so it would save some money.

Midwives would be at the hospital anyway. A whole team dedicated to homebirths would be unnecessary.

Get rid of birth centres too. How dare women have preferences.

If you had a difficult birth before, I a completely understand you having a c section this time round.

I don’t really care though. I get that people want to challenge themselves by having no pain meds in labour, but that doesn’t make them better than everyone else. Having an elective c section doesn’t make you worse than anyone else either. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it.

I agree.

Women shouldn't have to ''manage'' and should have access to all pain relief and all birthing options.

I really don’t care what other people do. Makes me laugh though when the OP asks whether people would judge her and when people say yes she gets all uppity. Not sure what she was expecting.

If you knew the ‘why’ was that they felt unable to cope with the pain of labour so wanted an elective c section instead, would you really still judge them? Why would you prefer they suffer than maintain bodily autonomy and feel positive and comfortable about their birth experience?

I never judge. But the people around me that have had c sections and natural have actually all said they would prefer natural. But that’s just my tiny world.

I think there is a lot of mis information across the board but I really think it’s all about having a healthy baby and a safe recovery.

Me too.

The absolute horror. 😂

And me.

With my first, I was having an elective section and I wasn’t planning to breastfeed.

I went to an NCT class and when I came out with those two things, you’d have thought I’d just bludgeoned a kitten to death in the middle of the room. Limped on for two more meetings, but I was shunned, so never went back.

The NCT woman said, “it’s probably for the best” when I said I was leaving. Prick.

I've had 2 C-sections so have never had the experience of giving birth vaginally and guess what? It's made no difference to my life or my children's life whatsoever.

Ignore anyone who says anything ignorant about your choices!

I went to NCT too and it was awful. I was also shunned.

Hindsight it’s a beautiful thing.

I won’t judge but considering my two vaginal births left me with a wreck of pelvic floor I would consider C-section as an option now.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😬

Op asked would i judge & i answered i would (dependant on why) but i wouldn’t actually ask someone why they had a c section so unless they specifically stated their reasons i wouldn’t be in a position to potentially “judge” them.

i wouldn’t care enough to think about it in detail and i wouldn’t comment on it because it’s not down to me but in that example i don’t think that “why” is a good enough reason because a cs isn’t exactly s pain free experience nor is the recovery. However, if their doctors were happy for them to have that “body autonomy” then thats between them but a cs will cost the nhs more than a vaginal birth and i’m assuming we aren’t talking about paying for one privately in this example?

i’ve had elcs so i’m not against them or judging people just for having one. I’ve also had an epidural as well which some people don’t agree with so not against pain relief but had i not been having twins i’d have had another (if it was possible) vaginal birth despite all my fears of pain, pre longed recovery & a repeat bad experience again rather than chose a big operation. However, finding out it was twins there was fears around early labour & the need for special care as both are quite common & then the fears of a vaginal birth were escalated and a twin mum i know had a failed vaginal birth and was rushed for an emsc & i wanted to avoid that and my consultant actually preferred elscs anyway.

it would be hypocritical to judge having one & it’s unlikely i would but if i knew someone was wanting one just for the sake of it then i would think “wow”

why do you care so much what a stranger on the internet thinks anyway? 🙄

@whathaveiforgotten ‘s post didn’t quote!

I literally had an ELCS this week and I did skin to skin the moment baby out in theatre and then in the recovery bay I did skin to skin for an hour and first feed.

With my emergency c-section baby was resuscitated and taken to nicu straight away but my elective c-section baby was weighed, measured, checked over, wrapped in a towel and given to dh to hold. Dh was sat behind me. It was horrible as every time I spoke, ds would turn his head towards the noise, looking for me. I wanted to hold him but I wasn't allowed. Ds is 11.

Personally I found the pain of the elective c-section was about the same as the pain with a vaginal birth. Except with my vaginal births the pain is during birth when you have a midwife and birthing partner encouraging you and telling you how brilliant you are. After the birth your birthing partner is looking after the other dc, you have bottles to wash up and sterilize and a baby to look after and there is very little sympathy. I would much rather have the pain during labour. That's just my experience though. Labour and c-sections are different for everyone.

No I would not judge but a lot of people do.

Ive just had my first and was heavily leaning towards an elective c section as I was extremely anxious about the birth and like yourself felt heavily judged for wanting this.

In the end I did have a vaginal birth after a short labour but that was after weighing up the pros and cons and I made it really clear in my notes that if things started to go sideways then c section was my next choice over forceps etc.

I was going to completely skip by this thread as I truly believe people's judgement over my choices aren't my business.

I had a maternal request c section for my 2nd labour. The pregnancy was complicated with health issues and I had birth trauma from baby number 1 to add to it, both types of delivery have their risks and complications. I do think people judge but I also think that's motherhood, it doesn't really come into conversation why I had a c section which minimises the judging tbh. I also don't think I would care enough about the opinion of anyone either way though, if you're judging me we're probably not each others people anyway.

I had skin to skin immediately, maybe a couple of minutes delay but that was the same as baby number 1 which was forceps delivery in theatre in the end.

I can tell you one never wished or preferred a natural birth.

I chose to have one with my 4th baby because I was told I needed to deliver at 39 weeks and I wasn't going to put myself through another induction after the horrendous time I had with my second child, told the consultant I'm opting for c-section instead and he said "that's fine I'll book you in"

Your experience isn't going to be the same as everyone else's is it? I'm sharing my experience which I am within my right to do without being belittled by a stranger.

It’s major surgery, don’t think being a “wuss” has anything to do with it..

I'm not belittling your experience I'm just sharing my, very up to date, experience of what the hospital I am in presumably offers as routine. I wouldn't want other women to think you don't get skin to skin after a c section. Baby literally came out rooting for my breast and I was feeding her in recovery. She wasn't taken off me at all. So I don't think it's had any effect on our bonding or feeding.
Has been painful in recovery but I weighed that up against my other reasons for choosing it around being in control after a bad birth last time.

All this skin to skin doesn't make the slightest bit of difference anyway. Wasn't done with my eldest two. Youngest one they tried but I soon pointed out they could clean and wrap him before dumping him on me