Would you judge someone for choosing to have a c section?

[ProudOtter]

I’m just curious as to why you would judge someone for choosing to have an elective c section?

For background I’ve decided I’d like to ask for a c section for baby number 2. Some people have made comments about me being insane, or that I’m missing out of giving birth “properly”

I am curious as to why some people have this view.

My first born was semi elective c section, was rushed into an induction due to minor fetal distress and escalated a bit so had to choice to attempt vaginal birth or go for a C-section and I chose the c section. Positive experience and no regrets.

Nope and anyone who does is an idiot. But the best thing to do is to just not give a shit. Someone judges you, let them. It’s nothing to do with you. What they think doesn’t matter, you can’t control it, so let them,

Signed happy receiver of two C sections, one elective.

No, I wouldn't judge any woman for birth choices.

Lots of women I know who gave birth "naturally" now have birth injuries that will affect them for the rest of their lives. Why would you blame anyone for wanting to avoid that? It makes sense! And C-sections aren't a walk in the park either, it's not a "wussy option".

As time goes on I've come to realise the truth of "there's nowt as queer as folk". People are just odd sometimes. Why does someone else's birth experience matter so much that an opinion must be expressed?! If it's right for you and medics are happy with the decision, forget everyone else.

Then, you're a twunt, aren't you?!

What a twatty thing to say.

Have you ever had a C-section? You know it’s not painless, right? Surely?

I don't see why anyone would give a shiny shit about another woman's choices. How does it make any difference to their own lives. None of their business, who cares what they think anyway. You do you.

I would not judge, whatever the reason behind a woman's choice around birth.

No. It's not my business how anyone else chooses to give birth.

Being utterly truthful, I would judge (internally only! and would NEVER say out loud as I know its not reasonable) for someone having a homebirth (I think they'd be crazy) and I would also internally judge someone who wanted an elective c-section if they were worrying about the pain of vaginal childbirth, or worrying about 'bagginess" or similar.

I'm being honest as this is an anonymous forum, and I know its a me thing, and not something that anyone should worry about

I wouldn’t judge anyone but would wonder why you would opt to be cut from hip to hip with 6 weeks recovery and no driving after.
It gives me the shivers. Tho my friends that have had c sections say it was fine, recovery was fine, driving again after 3 weeks.
Even still- what if you cough or sneeze 🤧
Oh the thought of it 🤪

Taken from Google:

Vaginal birth offers a shorter hospital stay, faster recovery, and fewer risks of surgical complications compared to a C-section. C-sections, while sometimes necessary, have risks like infection, longer recovery times, and potential complications in future pregnancies. Babies born vaginally may have a lower risk of certain health issues like asthma and obesity later in life.

Vaginal Birth:
Benefits:
Shorter hospital stay (often same day), faster recovery, fewer surgical risks (infections, bleeding, scarring).

Risks:
Potential for tearing or episiotomy, longer labor, possibility of complications during labor and delivery.

Baby:
May have lower risk of respiratory issues at birth (as they undergo a process during labor that prepares their lungs), and may receive beneficial bacteria as they pass through the birth canal.

C-section:
Benefits:
Safer for the mother and baby in certain situations (e.g., placenta previa, breech presentation, previous C-sections), can be scheduled in advance.

Risks:
Longer hospital stay, longer recovery time, higher risk of infection, blood loss, and complications in future pregnancies.

Baby:
May have a higher risk of breathing difficulties at birth due to retained lung fluid, and may be more prone to developing asthma, allergies, and obesity later in life.

In summary: Vaginal birth is generally considered safer for the mother and baby under normal circumstances, offering faster recovery and fewer risks. However, C-sections are necessary when a vaginal birth is not safe, providing a planned and controlled method of delivery in specific situations.

I stand by MY opinion (and I am entitled to it), that in normal circumstances, where there is no medical need for a c-section, then yes I am judgemental of women who choose not to give birth naturally.

Oh and I wouldn’t want to risk getting a mummy ledge.
like my friends have. my wee tummy is kept in tact

It is honestly no one else’s business how you choose to give birth.

Anyone wishing to judge another woman’s choice on birth needs to keep their opinions to themselves.

I just had an elective c-section for reasons relating to anxiety around birth. I'm also neurodivergent so opting for a more controlled way to bring my baby into the world felt much safer for both of us, after weighing up all the pros and cons and making an informed choice.
The experience was positive (sadly post natal ward another story!) and recovery has been fine so far.
I have had SO many people asking why I had one and giving me their unwanted opinions. I just tell them it was for medical reasons because it's absolutely none of their business how my baby was born.

I wouldn't judge but there can be health risks to a c section so I would hope they've thought through possible risks. I don't blame mothers for having them though . Passing a baby the size of a large watermelon through a very small opening and maybe wrecking your pelvic floor forever ? I can see why many mothers would say no thanks.

IME, women who judge those who have elective c-sections are jealous - of the much easier time the c-section women have. No birth injuries, everything the same as it was before the birth, and very little pain/very little labour, and a much easier, smoother recovery.

I had an emergency section with my first child, and a selective one for the second one. The sneery, snarky remarks I had when my DC were younger (for having c-sections) was quite amusing. Soooo bitter and snippy because they didn't get to have c-sections! 😆

I had a planned c section and no one ever said anything negative (to my face). Maybe depends on the social circle you mix in.

Not the point but you really aren’t cut hip to hip at all. My c section scar is about 3/4 inches and a tiny near invisible line!

I wouldn't want a homebirth either, I can't imagine anything worse but the person having a homebirth would probably say the same thing to me about choosing to have a c-section with my twins.

I don't care what the reason is, as long as women have an informed choice. Crack on.

Cut from hip to hip?! 😂 I didn't give birth to a friggin' hippo mate. 😆 My c-sections scars were tiny, my 'recovery' was about 10 days, and I was driving after 2 weeks.

I had such appalling care with dd1 I had a consultant agree to a cs before even conceiving second baby (you had to have a reason back then). Consultant read my notes which demonstrated the poor care (he apologised and was horrified by what happened). Second pregnancy happened quickly and I knew it would be cs delivery… then it turned out to be high risk identical twins so cs was only option. The irony.

i honestly recovered so much faster from second birth (C-section) than natural labour - mentally and physically! 32 stitches in my vagina took 10 months to feel anything like normal.

Agree. @TotallyAddictedToCoffee is embarrassing herself. 😬

That comment did make me PMSL. Cut hip to hip. FFS! 😂

No. I wouldn’t judge. But unfortunately people do. Everyone has reasons. I had an elective section with DS (my only child) due to tokophobia and my mental health suffering massively during pregnancy. It was actually the best experience. Calm, very relaxed, quick recovery, no complications, back home quickly. I’d do it again in a heartbeat if I have another. I had family members, my own mum included, telling me it would be awful, recovery would be hell, why was I choosing it etc. I had one consultant recommend a section to me given my mental health, he was so lovely and made me think that actually, this is all going to be ok, he agrees with me. Few weeks later I got called back for another birth choices appointment, different consultant, whose whole agenda was to get me to change my mind as the previous consultant had now left the hospital. She wanted me to be induced instead (baby was big and I’d developed polyhydramnios) and in the process told me all the interventions I might need etc (not what to say to someone with tokophobia!). DH was there and he was furious. I just burst into tears. I stood my ground. I also had a community midwife round after the birth who really didn’t agree with it. She said something like “oh so it was a section, you must have had such a tough time of it” and when I happily told her no, I hadn’t as it was elective and had been a lovely experience, recovery going great, she immediately changed and her whole demeanour got a bit frosty, and actually snapped “well why?” at me. Should have seen her face when I told her I also wasn’t exclusively breastfeeding. DH was there otherwise I’d have thought I imagined it as I never thought I’d get judged by a midwife who hadn’t even met me before and had been in my house all of 5 minutes.

I didn't dilate beyond 4cm for either of my births - first one ended in an EMCS when they lost DS1's heartbeat entirely, second one in a much calmer CS when I didn't dilate and DS2's head kept popping in and out of engagement increasing the risk he'd trap the cord with his giant noggin. They're 10 and 13 now, and I can honestly say no one's asked what kind of birth I had with them since roughly 2015. It's relevant for a tiny period of time so really don't stress yourself out about it.

I just went to measure mine and 13 years on I can’t actually see it… I can still feel the scar tissue at the opening of my vagina though and that was 17 years ago.