Would you judge someone for choosing to have a c section?

[ProudOtter]

I’m just curious as to why you would judge someone for choosing to have an elective c section?

For background I’ve decided I’d like to ask for a c section for baby number 2. Some people have made comments about me being insane, or that I’m missing out of giving birth “properly”

I am curious as to why some people have this view.

My first born was semi elective c section, was rushed into an induction due to minor fetal distress and escalated a bit so had to choice to attempt vaginal birth or go for a C-section and I chose the c section. Positive experience and no regrets.

Personally I think if you want to choose the more expensive option when there is no medical need, you should have to pay. I believe in your body, your choice, but not at the expense of already stretched nhs and maternity services.

It’s definitely a very different kettle of fish elective versus emergency.

I felt myself being cut open (spinal block hadn’t taken) and screamed, so had to give birth under general anaesthetic.

4 nights on a busy postnatal ward. During covid so husband could only visit for 1 hour a day. By the time I got home I’d been awake for 6 whole days and nights (2 in active labour and 4 on ward postnatal) and was delirious!

Obviously you would hope to avoid any of that with an elective but for me I wouldn’t want to risk the spinal block not taking again. I’m one and done it was so bad! Husband had the snip when baby was only 4 months old. We knew we were done after that!

Why should that only apply to women?

What about Joe who gets a serious football injury because he thinks he's Ronaldo? Or Brian who is eating himself to death?

Do you think smokers, drinkers, the obese, skiers, horse riders should also pay for their medical treatment? They are knowingly choosing to risk their health.

What if you have more than one child? No one needs more than one so should you pay if you have “too many” children?

Not me, but I expect some people would judge you because they’re nasty self righteous busy bodies. View it as a filter. Have your elective section, tell people about it, and those who respond negatively you’ll know not to bother with in future. I’ve had two elective caesareans (due to me being disabled, not that it matters) and I’ve come across people on the internet claiming that I’m not a real mother as a result. I give zero fucks!

I was told I’d had ‘the easy way out’ and I was gutted. A c section was not what I’d wanted but my baby and I would’ve died without the emergency section I ended up having. 11 months on and I’m still completely traumatised by the whole event and having counselling. I will never get over it. Recovery was horrendous. I still have pain behind my scar and huge sections of numb skin across my stomach and hips. Dunno what bit was the ‘easy way out’.

I think much of the NHS should move to insurance and top up fees (GP visits, ambulance call outs, A&E visits should all carry a fee) but that's a whole other conversation.

Ladies, the GOOGLE AI HAS SPOKEN.

These are exactly the reasons I wanted to avoid a c-section. Even a 4 hour stay overnight on the maternity ward was enough for me!
I chose to have an ECV for my first (breech) pregnancy and I'm so glad I did.

I don't agree but at least it's consistent if you feel the same about c-sections. Though I would also add epidurals, other pain relief and home births.

Why on earth do you care how I feel? Why does what I feel have any impact on you?

I have my reasons and since I dont agree with any elective surgery I am entitied to that feeling.

You judge me for feeling the way I do but I would never say anything to you but yet you judge me for feeling that way.

The irony isn’t lost on me. I will never agree with an elective c section and thats fine. There is no reason to take it personally.

@Rainingalldayonmyhead this is an open discussion and some of us are trying to understand the reasoning. Genuinely, what is there to judge?

Do you not think pain relief is medically necessary? If not, do you consider that it’s ever necessary? Or is it only unnecessary for vaginal birth?

But your argument doesn’t hold. If you skip and fall and break a bone there is only one course of action. Not you can have an X-ray and a cast for which costs £1000 or you can have an mri and a fibreglass cast for £5000 and you choose the more expensive one.

Yea if you need a c section all
power to you, but you are choosing the more expensive option including resources, time and bed space. I’m not cool with that gin how stretched our NHS has become when there is a perfectly fine first option.

I don’t care how anyone has their baby.
Just get it born.

Stress, fear, trauma and PTSD are fine reasons. You’re allowed to be afraid of the pain of your vag tearing. You’re allowed to be afraid of 6-11lbs coming out of a vagina, the unpredictability, a group of strangers looking at your distressed fanny and of birth injuries.
You’re allowed to feel afraid of the understaffed state of midwifery in the NHS, therefore opting for planned consultant care.
You’re entitled to find a way to birth which avoids those things. If that’s means a c-section is the answer, good for you.

Rates of skin to skin are lower for cs than VB. there are anecdotes to the contrary but they are not the trend.

study www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0266613820302345#:~:text=Findings%3A%20The%20frequency%20of%20skin,gave%20birth%20via%20vaginal%20birth.

this study quotes comparative rates

I think choice is incredibly important. Including pain relief and treatment options if multiple options are possible.

If the choice is taken away for women who would prefer a c-section then I don't see why others should get the option for home births, pain relief and no charges for preventable and costly to the NHS things such as obesity and sport injuries because if it's acceptable to take choices away from women and have them pay, the same has to go for others.

Side by side, the cost of an elective c-section is £700 more expensive than a vag birth.

However, when you factor in costs of processing of accident and negligence claims associated with vaginal births, which are higher than in c-section, elective c-sections are cheaper.

Finally, for those saying you’re optioning for poorer heath outcomes for your kid, like allergies, obesity - no, these are associations, NOT causations. Same way, there is higher mortality associated with vag birth vs c-section.

But what has she said that’s untrue?
I keep seeing defensive replies giving annecdotes that “well that’s not what happened to me”. Sure. But I stand by my assertion that for the average baby for the average mother Vaginal birth is better for the baby. Now, everyone is free to make their own choices based on their own circumstances and weigh up what is best for everyone. That doesn’t take away from the fact that that choice may be suboptimal for the baby. And yeah, baby still gets born. Your body your choice etc. but bottom line your choice may not prioritise the short and long term outcomes of your babY. if you are so very confident in your choices why do you care a fig what the internet or a group of strangers think?!?

No definitely not. My eldest is 26 and his birth was so horrific and traumatic I dint think I’ve ever truly gotten over it. Number 2 and number 3 were both ELCS’s largely because I’d had a few surgeries to repair damage caused.

Why would home births cost more?

Some of it is untrue.
If we look at mortality, vag is safer for the mother, but ELCS is safer for a baby.
Not a v popular statistic, but there it is.

If someone claims something doesn't happen during a c-section, especially when they've never had one, of course you'll get some responses that will say 'actually, that wasn't my real life experience'. It doesn't make them defensive either.

Rate of emergency and long stay neonatal care afterwards.

Depends how it goes, it also depends if the area has a homebirth team or if community midwives are used. Not having a homebirth team would save money too.

They aren't free though and they offer women choices. If we are taking women's choices away, home births aren't necessary and should be included.