Is this enough calories to keep a human alive?

[Glokkey]

is this enough calories to keep a human alive?

2 cheese and onion rolls (look Ike sausage rolls)
5 scotch eggs
bombay mix
magnum

one sausage in a roll
coleslaw
wedges

@Glokkey after your 1st post I wanted to ask 'what are the portion sizes & cooking methods?' for those things make a difference to calorie content.
After your 2nd post I'm wondering what age your mum is, and I'm really feeling for your mum and you.
Does she have good support from her g.p.?
Are they aware of/concerned about the weight loss?
It certainly sounds significant and worrying, but as to whether it'll pose an acute health risk, did she have it to lose (as in, carrying excess weight) or is she now underweight?

It will be the stress of it, I hardly ate for 2 months when my Father and DD died within 12 weeks of each other and weighed just under 7 stone. Losing 2 stone in about 6 weeks. Even if you can eat the body can have pure adrenaline running through it and it just burns calories.

Just make sure she takes vitamin supplements and some omega 3 fish oil.

I ended up with my sister making me full fat milkshakes with double cream, ice cream and fruit in. The worst was loads of my hair fell out.

Which antidepressant is she on OP? If she’s not already on it, she could consider mirtazipine. It’s stimulates appetite and is good for depression with loss of appetite.

Haven’t seen anyone mention it (might just have missed it) but antidepressants can also make you not hungry or even feel sick so if the timing of the weight loss and her going on meds coincide then you may want to suggest she speaks to a doctor to change meds. Sometimes they can use a different med from the same family so that she doesn’t have to start again from week 1!

So much great advice. I can’t thank you all enough. I genuinely have felt less alone tonight and that has done me wonders.

Mum has always liked peanut butter (my lot don’t) so I will buy some and shove it in a croissant with jam. Served with a glass of milk. I’m certain that wil get eaten.

I would be really surprised if there is any undermining condition. The weight just fell off when she stopped eating. I’m sure she wasn’t eating anything for long stretches before I had move in with me. I dropped off food and assumed she was eating it.

Switched from sertraline to citalopram

What age is she? As we age we don't need as many calories for starters and meals do generally get smaller. But I do get it if she is losing weight fast. Is she already thin, or will it do her any harm to lose some weight?

Mum is 66. She’s taken time off work but was very active and social prior to bereavements

Mum was probably slightly overweight before weight loss but carried it very well. 165 pounds? Now she just looks terrible.

Does she like sweets or chocolate? You could have some of those about in a bowl
scone with jam and clotted cream is pretty calorie heavy even half of one

She loves scones. She can take or leave chocolate.

Think I will try crumble tomorrow.

Thanks so much everyone.

Offer her vitamin drinks - easy prepackaged with a straw.
Leave her to be sad.
Does she need a dental checkup?
Eat a Magnum with her every day.

I'm so sorry for your losses, OP. I think it's very understandable that's she's feeling lost and without appetite. I would encourage another GP visit, though, as I wonder if they could switch her to an antidepressant that is more of an appetite stimulant?

I know this isn't the same thing, but when a family member was going through chemo, things with a more umami sweet/sour/salty profile- spring rolls with sweet chilli sauce, salads with dressings made with balsamic vinegar, honey, mustard and olive oil, etc. seemed to be appetite stimulants, even though she was sure she didn't want them. And does she like pasta? Macaroni cheese, carbonara etc. are quite high calorie.

Sending hugs and good thoughts to your family.

It's great that you are looking after her like this.

As well as what she can cope with eating, think about whether she's managing better with food she can eat any time, on her own, in her room etc. Maybe do her a snack tin for beside her bed.

Family time will be good for her I am sure, but if she is struggling she might need more downtime than usual and short-term, that may be when it's easier to eat.

Good luck! We had this challenge with my Mum. What worked for us were lots of very creamy yogurts in the flavour she liked best (Yeo greek with honey) and I made up bottles of "iced coffee" which she loved - I put lots of healthy things in it like vitamins and maple syrup and full fat milk.

We also used Apple ensure from the chemist - it is a complete drink and she loved apple juice so we knew she was getting calories and vitamins from it.

And very comforting easy to eat food like shepherds pie seemed to work well though the sweet stuff was always the most reliable.

Chocolate mousse with eggs and cream was always a good bet and Nowadays I would also make her a silken tofu pud - its so healthy and has protein in it - just look up recipes on line... either chocolate or coffee and maple syrup.

ps so many of us have been there - it is very moving how you want to look after your Mum xx

Oh .. and two other things that helped were eating with her and a mix of roasted nuts - lots of calories, good fats and protein - I did give them a wee shake to get rid of excess salt first.

Grieving is a tough time with its own rules... the love and care of those remaining is so important, and will give her the confidence to reengage with her own life when she is able

Just wanted to second the Mirtazapine recommended by a PP.

An ex had treatment-resistant depression and lost a significant amount of weight. Once he’d been switched to Mirtazapine, his mood improved and he began gaining weight again.

I’m so sorry, I can’t help with advice about the grief, but I have a close friend who was similar after her husband left her, and I found it was easier to encourage her to eat things like cheese and charcuterie boards with bread and hummus and crisps- basically lots of high calories nibbles, that we could chat over and she could eat without feeling pressured - the eating became incidental if you see what I mean?

I also found just making a round of toast and putting it between us when I put the kettle on, or sticking an open bag of chocolates on the sofa next to her, and nibbling myself, would sort of encourage slightly mindless eating…

And I wasn’t above hiding calories and nutrients in meals. So I’d make a pasta bake, for example, and make it with cream cheese and whizzed veg, and shove in as much bacon etc as possible.

You are doing fantastic helping her heal even though you’re grieving and overworked and must need mum to look after you as well. I’d do biscuits with every cup of tea, little dishes of crisps and nuts and lots of the hot snacky things as well as meals (which she won’t eat).

My 95 year old mother’s diet is about 50% comprised of Cornetto ice creams. They are the only thing she will eat of her own initiative, without prompting - she sometimes eats 3+ a day.

I’m relaxed about it. At her age, quality of life is our priority over quantity, and keeping weight on her is an important part of that - when her weight dips too low she’s constantly cold and shivery and cannot get warm.

We’re not worried about nutrition, short or long term - as I’ve told the nurses at our GP surgery, I don’t care that she’s pre-diabetic as long as she stays the right side of the 40kg line.

But if your mother is young enough to potentially have another 15-20 years or more, then your priorities are going to be different and long-term nutrition is more of a consideration.

I am also mum to an anorexic daughter. Giving your mum the most calorie dense foods is the way to go as I can see you’ve ascertained.

All food is food. No such thing as junk food when you have someone loosing weight this fast. The body can last on a surprisingly limited range of foods when needed.

My dd won’t drink anything other than diet drinks atm so I can totally understand your issues.

I get food deliveries and scout for the highest calorie dense food of whatever she will eat. Her diet is very limited atm so I can’t add cream to meals and such like. She eats things like humous and sour cream and chive dip. There is a large difference in the calorie content of these - M&S dip is the highest calorie I’ve found for example. There is also a lot of difference in the calories in various ice creams. Even foods like full fat Greek yoghurt vary.

I would be concerned about your mum and monitor what is going on. Anorexia has a generic component. Some people can go into calorie deficit and never suffer. However, others start to suffer from a lot of anorexic behaviours.

Grief can make you lose appetite completely so although it’s unhealthy at least she’s eating something
Hot meals may be too much
I know when I’ve been severely depressed and suffered bereavements, I can only tolerate bland cold foods( yogurt, crisps, plain biscuits)

I think she needs to see her doctor to rule out a medical problem. Until then, I would be getting her some icecream (very high calories) and some nutrient shakes in tetra packs. See if she will tolerate those.