To be fed up of being on a good income but always skint?

[Justonemorecurlywurly]

I know I’m going to get flamed, lots of “boo-hoo, poor you”, and that there are people far worse off but -

Our household income (family of 4) is roughly £110-120k. DH earns about £100k of that, I’m self employed and part time so my income fluctuates. I think that’s pretty good money but it feels like we can never afford to do anything.

No holiday for 2 years.
1 car
Very few clothes
Modest house

If after paying bills, we ever buy something non-essential like a meal out, or maybe one or two items of new clothes, birthday present, that’s it, we’re out of money for the month. And we have no savings. It’s ridiculous!

We did try to move a few years back but couldn’t afford it so remortgaged instead to extend the house a little. We got the best deal we could and borrowed only as much as we were comfortable with (even though it meant we couldn’t do as much work as we needed). But unfortunately we made a mistake fixing the new mortgage for only two years and when that time was up, rates had shot to which has made our repayments considerably more expensive which really hasn’t helped.

I’m so fed up of it. I honestly feel like we felt so much better off about 10 years ago when we were earning A LOT less.

Does anyone else feel like this? Is it just that everything is so expensive now??

I know some people will say I should work full time but for reasons I won’t go into, I need to be available for my DC so me being p/t works much better for the whole family.

OK, but that doesn't change the principle that a household income of £120k (especially when almost all that income comes from one person, magnifying the impact of higher rate tax) isn't the magical squillionaire income that a lot of MNetters think it is. It provides a household take-home pay that is (very roughly - YMMV) double that of a household with 2 FT workers on the NMW. Double the other household, yes (and I'll repeat this point again - no one is suggesting the 6-figure household in this strawman comparison is in poverty FAOD!), but it's not unimaginable riches just because it's in the magical 6-figure territory.

But perhaps that's part of the problem for the OP - maybe she naively thinks she should be able to afford a more luxurious lifestyle on that income than she actually can?

If they have kids, rent or some disability yes it is possible.

The take home is way more than double the two NMW take home - it’s over 4 times if you include OP earnings

guess OP is investing in a house that eats up her cash - that’s her choice

Because most people manage a holiday most years and most people manage to cloth themselves and have a bit of fun and most people are taking home far less than OP

No it isn't.

Read my previous post that includes the calculations.

The OP's household income is roughly 50% more than a similar family with two people earning minimum wage.

Do you have a leak?! The average water bill is £39/mo. £120/mo for water doesn't sound right at all.

www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/blog/utilities/how-much-is-the-average-water-bill-per-month

The problem is that the cost of everything has increased - some you notice massively eg mortgage repayments. Others sort of sneak - groceries, coffees, kids clothes, admission to cinema, absolutely everything has hiked. Holidays and cars are more expensive.

So you will be doing perfectly normal (for you / your family) purchasing but it now wipes out your money. You do have to budget and be aware. Even as a top 5% or whatever earner.

People giving out to the OP for being crap with money - not really the point!

Maybe everyone is ok with falling standards of living and thinks we should all just be happy at the growing inequality between the super rich and the rest of us?

It absolutely is the point.

She says they're 'always skint'
'it feels like we can never afford to do anything'
No holiday for 2 years
1 car
Very few clothes
Modest house
No savings

that they have very little for things that are 'non-essential like a meal out, or maybe one or two items of new clothes, birthday present' so it means they're 'out of money for the month'.

But at the same time, they have at least TWO THOUSAND POUNDS per month, that's not accounted for. After all essentials are paid. Many people don't even earn that amount and need it to pay for housing, bills, food etc.

Yet the OP is apparently spending that amount of money on things she doesn't even notice or value so can't (or won't) explain and just wants people to join in with the pity party and blame 'the system' rather than do something constructive to make her money go further.

The fact that they've remortgaged at least an extra £150k without thinking it's relevant or that it's normal for G&E for a 'modest house' to cost £270 pm is rather telling.

We're back to the MN definition of skint, ie being unable to buy whatever you want whenever you want without any compromise whatsoever.

@3amamama It’s you who’s missing the point, so let me explain again as simply as I can:

OP was whining she and her family can’t afford to do much, yet she neglected to tell us that she and her husband have £1.5K - £2K every month as disposable income to do whatever they want with.

Well this family don't have rent so they wouldn't be getting money for that. So building in rent payments isn't comparable

Even with it not being " squillionaire" there is still 2k after bills unaccounted for each month. That's more than my income before bills

I think the point is simply that that £2k a month goes nowhere near as far as one might expect / have reasonably hoped only a couple of years ago.

Wages and earning abilities / trajectories are not keeping up with costs increases.

That’s all.

And yes it’s much more than a lot have, and it is clearly much harder - nigh on impossible I’d say - for those whose wages are stagnating entirely in this economy.

2k a month AFTER bills. The OP doesn't seem to know where that's gone though

Well, exactly this. I don't rethink op owes anyone their budget or breakdown of personal circumstances, she's just upset that what should be a good income doesn't stretch as far as it should do. And yes, partly it is a systemic fault. Lots of people who didn't feel a squeeze before are now, and these threads pop up in quick succession. Clearly, people are affected. I know a few people who haven't been hugely affected but they live far with small mortgages or have indeed paid off theirs (like prob a lot of people here)

True, we chose our area because the school was outstanding rated. And when we first took out a mortgage we had put down a very good deposit and were offered an interest rate of 1.5% this later when down even further to 1.3% and we should have locked in for longer than 3 years. When our rate ended the interest rates had gone up and our mortgage interest rate went up to 4.99%, also I changed jobs in between due a really toxic work situation so we had to manage for nearly a year on only my hubby’s income. Really felt the pinch then though in the past when I was on maternity we have managed on much less salary. The cost of things has really gone up! Now I have found a new job and hubby also got a hike so we are very comfortable, but I completely get how people can struggle even on a larger salary as everything is more expensive now!

costs have gone up enormously but also you’ll be paying the higher rate tax band, so salary if £100k must be amazing but the more you earn the more you’re taxed so you actually get a lot of your higher salary:

PAYE tax rateRate of taxAnnual earnings the rate applies to
(above the PAYEthreshold)
Basic tax rate
20%
Up to £37,700
Higher tax rate
40%
From £37,701 to £125,140
Additional tax rate
45%
Above £125,140

• England and N Ireland 2025-26 source www.gov.uk

My husband and I get UC and he earns 72k. We rent and have 2 kids who get disability benefits, also they take off 55% of my husband's net wage over £404 from our award so the most welcome get is about £600 in a month, but that's only if my husband does no overtime and gets a flat wage. I don't work as we have a baby and 7 year old with significant autism and school problems

If you only bring in as little as 10k a year then your business isn’t viable! A minimum wage job would pay double that!