To ask how some people making looking so normal so good?

[Upsetbetty]

I’m genuinely baffled, yesterday at work one of the women came in and I was blown away as I am most days. It was Friday so she was dressed a bit more casual. She only had on a pair of mom jeans, and a plain crewneck jumper, but it was to put togetherness that I couldn’t get over. Underneath her jumper, she had a long white sleeve top and the neck of the top could JUST be seen popping up from her jumper, she rolled up her jumper sleeves so you could see the white sleeves underneath, she had a pair of Adidas sambas on. It just looked so perfectly put together and thought out yet so simple at the same time. If I tried to emulate that I would look scruffy!! Just how does she do it? Anyone have any insight? I asked her and she told me where she got said items but I supppse it’s the fit that worked so well.

I was just trying to say that the things I’ve seen for sale abroad often just don’t work in the UK, even though they look great there, that’s all.

But you can buy colour in the UK 😆

I was looking online at outfit inspiration recently....there was a woman wearing black leggings, a loose white vest and a long beige cardigan over it. It looked incredible. She was probably a size 6-8, olive skinned and long dark hair. She looked so chic and stylish. But honestly on a pale, chubby, size 14, that outfit of leggings, vest and long cardigan would look average verging on crap.

The things that make me always feel not-put-together are 1) I have big boobs so a lot of outfits just don't look right on me, 2) I have fine wispy hair so it never looks 'done' unless I spend aaages on it, and 3) I have a sticky out tum (thank you peri-menopause) so I find my jeans never hang right. I revel instead in looking slightly scruffy and alternative, but secretly clothes-wise I would love to look like an actual 52 year old woman rather than a teenage boy!

Google the sandwich theory for clothing. I came across it on TikTok and it makes sense and relates to your comment about her trainers having the same colour as her jumper.

I give up… I think you’re deliberately being obtuse. Of course you can. But the light and the intensity of the fabric and the exact shade of your skin will dictate whether it looks right.

But the light and the intensity of the fabric and the exact shade of your skin will dictate whether it looks right.

Nobody has disagreed with that...

Try steaming ! It’s easier and less hard on the clothes.

The light in winter time in the UK does make me look awful...i look sort of grey. I look so much nicer in the summer.

And I didn’t say you couldn’t buy colour in the UK. Just that it has tended to be less common. And that led my mind to meander on to the slightly different, but related point about when I’ve bought brights abroad that looked amazing there and pulled them out of the suitcase arriving home in the UK only to find they look garish in the UK light.

You could still be right though.
HT of my sons school is like that just always looks amazing, I thought she was really tall - until I stood beside her.

She's about 5ft 1 but slim built so looks taller. A size 10 is still quite a neat size for someone of that height.

I see colour in London & tend to notice people who dress well often have a bit of colour on. Many people wear head to toe black which can be draining to the skin. And many wear the wrong coloured beige if they go for the classic beige trench or coat.

I have items of clothing that I wear in the South of France (visit family there regularly) that I wouldn't wear in London or Paris for that matter. But it's not about the colour more the style & practicality.

It also probably depends on your lifestyle, age, friendship circle though in terms of how common colour is. I was not being obtuse, I just don't agree with you but you are under no obligation to agree with me.

Most of the time I look a little bit scruffy, largely because I have wild hair that I CBA to style. However, I ‘scrub up’ well. I’ve learned a few things that are vital to a well put together look:

Forget fashion. Go for classic, and, more importantly, what works best for your body shape.

Coordinate colours and accessories.

Ironing makes a huge difference. I hate it and avoid it like the plague so generally buy things that don’t need ironing but have the odd piece that I wear that has to be ironed.

Choose good fabrics. They drape better no matter your body shape.

I’m 5’3” and less than 8 stone, but I have broad shoulders and no waist. I cannot wear off-the-shelf dresses unless I have them altered or they are a particular cut. Anything loose where the fabric is gathered or seamed at the waist (which a lot of manufacturers do because it’s cost effective) looks awful on me. However, an a-line dress made up of panels that run from shoulder/neck to hem with no seam at the waist hangs well. Likewise, high waited or low rise jeans look good but waist-height jeans look terrible. This is what I mean about knowing what works for you.

That might be because you are trying to look good in what somebody else looks good in. I look shite in most 'on trend' stuff, always have. Part of that is because it's not really my taste, it says nothing about me as a person.

What do you like? Colours? Patterns? Plain? Dress for the person you are.

Same with the house, really. I have bugger all idea of interior design, but I'm not furnishing a show home. My philosophy is, it looks good if I like it.

The trouble is, too often we style ourselves and our homes for other people. We don't look right in the outfit, or like the look of stuff we try to do in our homes because we're trying to look like someone else, however subconscious that might be.

Someone upthread said about owning the outfit. In my opinion, after many efforts when younger to look as good as others and failing miserably, you can't own an outfit if you are trying to look like somebody else.

That possibly sounds like a lot of bollocks,l but it works for me.

@ObelixtheGaul I understand what you mean. But I know what I feel most comfortable in and it's jeans and t-shirt or dresses in the summer. I love dresses because there is nothing to coordinate. If I was interested in fashion or home deco I could probably learn what goes together I suppose but I hardly notice my surroundings or what people are wearing so I suppose there is no hope😄

I’m not the one who said anything about only liking neutrals. I do like neutrals and I also like some colours and very occasionally a bit of pattern. I have a bit of a thing fur orange and some stripes.
my comments were questioning someone who blanket dislikes neutrals. How anyone considers neutrals straight out boring is peculiar to me.

I had a session with a stylist recently and it was life-changing! From the clothes I already own, she created an outfit for every area of my life (work, school run, date night, etc) and paired them with accessories and they all looked amazing!

For instance, I bought a trench coat but never wore it as it looked ridiculous on me. She tied the belt at the back in 3 different places and rolled the sleeves up. The difference was unbelievable. It looked great!

She also recommended to always roll your sleeves up with long dresses, like Alemais, to always show your wrists.

I would highly recommend a session with a personal stylist if you can afford it. It will save you money in the long run as you buy less clothes.

@springbringshope Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you only liked neutrals. I was just trying to think of someone who always wore neutrals & looked stylish.

I've just learned that in styling stripes are considered to be a neutral, but yes agree that a pop of bright colour could be nice (around 20% of your wardrobe is the rule for a capsule wardrobe), just so long it's not 100% of your wardrobe, which then becomes a nightmare to style.

My own wardrobe has colour in it in addition to neutrals, but neutrals will always be dominant. And there will absolutely never be any kind of pattern in it again (with the exception of stripes).

Just about every stylist on Youtube. Or just search 'quiet luxury' on Google

I know the look that was in but I was asking if there was any specific celebs who wear
only neutrals. I know Angelina Jolie likes them but I prefer her in colour. Surely stylists will have started to update their look now as things are moving away from 'quiet luxury'?

Maybe Claudia Winkelman as a “neutral” ? Although she’s appeared in red on Strictly I think.

I am not sure I want to compare how I would dress to how a celebrity would dress necessarily. For starters we would have completely different lifestyles and so would have different needs and requirements for our clothes. Celebrities are in the public eye a lot more and so there is dare I say more of a need to impress, whereas I am more concerned with not getting dirty on the tube 🤣 I don't know why you think the quiet luxury aesthetic is going out of style? It's based on a classic style and will always be in fashion. A classic is called a classic for a reason, and that's why I feel safer investing in higher quality clothes in neutral shades, because I can be sure of keeping these items for many years or even decades rather than jumping on the latest colour trend,which then quickly goes out of style and needs to be replaced with something else.

I am not sure I want to compare how I would dress to how a celebrity would dress necessarily

I don't dress anything like Queen Maxima or Lupita who I mentioned upthread but I still think they have great style.

@Teado yes she does tend to stick to neutrals and lots of black, I like her style.

I don't know why you think the quiet luxury aesthetic is going out of style? It's based on a classic style and will always be in fashion. A classic is called a classic for a reason

Because I used to be a buyer (lots of friends still in the industry) and things change, that's the cycle of fashion. Yes, the classic look will always be around just like trainers or jeans will always be around but it doesn't mean that every influencer or stylist or SM will be pushing that particular thing/look.

why I feel safer investing in higher quality clothes in neutral shades

Do you not worry about staining neutral shades?

One thing I liked about the SS catwalks was the trend for personal style/individuality. SM & algorithms are creating so much uniformity and there is a bit of backlash.

www.nytimes.com/2024/09/20/style/prada-fendi-milan-fashion-week.html