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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

One day old baby in pub

785 replies

Frenchie01 · 09/04/2025 23:27

So family member gave birth to first baby yesterday afternoon, she's a very young mum only 17 , normal delivery but episiotomy, baby good weight healthy. Was discharged home today and a couple of hours later was at the local pub not drinking alcohol just showing baby off and eating a meal , but am I right in thinking a day old baby baby is really too young to be in a pub or anywhere really , also worried she should be resting as obviously will be sore. Other family members have said I'm being old fashioned am I.

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 09/04/2025 23:57

DS was two days old. I'd had a CS. We stopped off on the way home (,it was a 45 min drive home) to go to Tescos Extra. You know one of those ridiculously big ones. We wander around for ages working out what we needed to buy. I also went out for the day at a local event when DS was 4 days old. DH had DS. I got asked when the baby was due. That caused a certain amount of embarrassment when I said "oh no he was born a couple of days ago, he's over there somewhere".

Is it just places where alcohol is served that gets the judge my treatment.

LoserWinner · 09/04/2025 23:59

I taught a ballet lesson the day after my first was born…

SouthLondonMum22 · 09/04/2025 23:59

Sounds fine to me. If she wasn't feeling up to it, I'm sure she wouldn't be there. No issue with the baby out either.

Original poster
Frenchie01 · 10/04/2025 00:04

Well it's official I'm a wimp lol , had allmy babies a long time ago and couldn't go anywhere for a few days , I'm 42 now and glad I'm not having any more cos I don't think k I would make it out of the house for a year now lol 😂

OP posts:
Allthatwegotisthispalebluedot · 10/04/2025 00:05

Newborn babies are ok in pubs but I wish they would ban children between 6 months and 18 years old, like a childfree wedding everyone else on mumsnet complains about. They ruin the fucking atmosphere for everyone else.

doreeen · 10/04/2025 00:05

we stopped for food at a busy service station on the way home from hospital with DS age 2 days. was starving and wanted a McDonald’s.

DC2 I was doing school runs etc in the first weeks. I know people with even more children especially don’t get to just shut away from the world for a few weeks.

TomatoSandwiches · 10/04/2025 00:05

She may have some sort of adrenaline rush going on, I would check up on her in a week or so for baby blues just in case.

Sonolanona · 10/04/2025 00:06

We called into Tesco on the way home.. DD2 was 6 hours old.
I was a bit tired though... Popped DD2 in her car seat in the trolley, Dh went off round the shop with our other two (aged just 2 and just 1!) in another trolley.
I wandered off from the nappy section, forgetting my trolley and baby!!! Dh caught up with me and asked where she was...waddled back to the nappies where she was surrounded by Tesco employees . They were very understanding😆

uncomfortablydumb60 · 10/04/2025 00:09

It’s fine as long as she feels up to it
i was at the local park 13 hours after I had DS3 It was a boiling hot August so I took DS1 and DS2 pushing my new pram

Zoflorabore · 10/04/2025 00:09

HaddyAbrams · 09/04/2025 23:31

I went to Tesco on the way home after having DS2. He was about 12 hours old. If she felt up to it then that's up to her. It's not like the days when pubs were full of smokers.

so did I! It was literally on the way home and I felt fine. Gone are the days when women were confined to a hospital bed for a week or two and not allowed to do anything.

Globules · 10/04/2025 00:09

Good for her. I think it's great she's enjoying showing off her newborn.

I did a big IKEA shop and had lunch there on day 3 of DDs life. 22 month old DS was also there.

It was my 30th birthday and I needed meatballs and lingonberry sauce. Worth the 3 hour round trip.

TheSilentSister · 10/04/2025 00:10

I had a C-section and was in hospital for a day and then released. The next day I was shopping in Sainsbury's with baby in a sling. Saw someone I knew who was gobsmacked I was out and about. I felt fine.
Each to their own.

BoredZelda · 10/04/2025 00:10

Frenchie01 · 09/04/2025 23:50

Just to clarify I wasn't judging her , I was only 16 when I had first baby many years ago . She will be a brilliant mum I'm sure i was just concerned she might be overdoing it and wondered if others thought I was being old fashioned that's all , clearly I am . I just remember feeling too shit to go anywhere all 3 times but like i said we're all different

If this were true, your post would surely be titled “should this new mum be taking it easy”

Of course you judged this 17 year old mum for taking a one day old baby to the pub. But then others said it was no problem and suddenly it is all about the mum? I think not.

Flatandhappy · 10/04/2025 00:11

I had a home birth with my second. I took him to show off to the people who ran the pub across the road when he was 7 hours old. I even had a pint of Guinness as I wasn’t breastfeeding and funnily enough 26 years later nobody has been traumatised by it. He was at DS1’s swimming lesson the next day too because life goes on.

veganfortheanimals21 · 10/04/2025 00:11

Allthatwegotisthispalebluedot · 10/04/2025 00:05

Newborn babies are ok in pubs but I wish they would ban children between 6 months and 18 years old, like a childfree wedding everyone else on mumsnet complains about. They ruin the fucking atmosphere for everyone else.

How do they? If you mean potential noise, should kids and adults stimming and having meltdowns because of autism or similar neurodivergence be banned too? You'd hate my family being in pubs and restaurants if so because it's near constant some kind of noise because of disabilities. So neurotypical babies would seem a breeze!

Soontobesingles · 10/04/2025 00:11

I had a baby at 39 and day she came home we had Xmas with extended relatives then a
couple days later drinks in the pub with mates. You are being interfering where it doesn’t concern you.

BaileyBear · 10/04/2025 00:12

As long as mum feels fine I don’t see an issue. Everyone’s birth is different and personally I wouldn’t judge another mum for taking her baby out. Some people power on and others choose to rest, there’s no right or wrong, it’s a very personal choice.

UniqueRedSquid · 10/04/2025 00:12

Mine is three weeks old. Been to the pub twice, first time on day 6.

We probably weren’t physically up to it for the first couple of days after a long labour followed by an emergency section but after that we were keen to get out and see other people that we know and live locally that drink in that pub.

It was good for us to have a gab. People were interested in the baby but respectful about not asking to have a hold.

Tdcp · 10/04/2025 00:14

I'm impressed that she can sit on a hard chair after an episiotomy. I'm 12 days pp and still uncomfortable 😅

PluckyBamboo · 10/04/2025 00:17

I'm super impressed, don't think I left the house for at least a week, pretty sure I would have left a pool of blood on the pub floor if that had been me after one day.

MumWifeOther · 10/04/2025 00:17

I wouldn’t take my baby to a pub.

Mumwithbaggage · 10/04/2025 00:18

Picked up older ones from school with the baby after I was discharged. Having stopped at Pizza Express on the way home from the hospital - but she was no.4.

Middleagedstriker · 10/04/2025 00:18

I was at a wedding with dc3 at 3 days old (family wedding that they planned around mine and the brides due dates) dc3 was 2 weeks late!

Jiggedyjig · 10/04/2025 00:20

The thinking used to be that after spending nine months cocooned in the womb a baby should spend its first few weeks in a similar environment- sleeping and feeding in a warm, quiet place. Not sure a pub qualifies as that.

GrandTheftWalrus · 10/04/2025 00:21

Can't remember when dd1 first went to the pub but I know she was papped up to my mums at 4 weeks old so I could go on a Xmas night out.

Dd2 was in the pub when she was less than 48hrs old. The manager was rather shocked when I told her that as dd2 didn't even have a name yet!