To think of myself as a girl at 50? [Light-hearted]

[ThisFluentBiscuit]

Well, I'm sorry, but I do. I don't think I've aged much at all - I don't look much different from when I was 28 I think, (🤭) and I looked girlish then. I'd rather be a girl, which has connotations of freedom and fun, than a woman, which has connotations of too much responsibility!

I think being called a girl is a big compliment. It means you look young. It's equivalent in the States to being called Miss instead of Ma'am. The dreaded ma'am!!!

This thread has been inspired by another thread where the OP says he's confused by a girl at work, who is 41. Some posters objected to any female over the age of 18 being called a girl.

Well, I'll still be identifying as a girl when I'm 80, probably!

Older celebrity women around my age who I think of as girls:
Kate Moss
Jennifer Aniston
Victoria Beckham

In my mind, the above and me are all still 28 but could pass for much younger. 😂😂😂

It's a good day when I'm referred to as a girl. 🤪 Also - and this is the most important part - even though my parents are dead and I'm post-menopausal, I FEEL like a girl!

So, AIBU??

I don’t think anyone is saying they consider all adults as boys and / or girls are they (sorry if I’ve missed it), they’re saying that tin their own heads they still consider themselves to be a girl.

I definitely still have moments where I think ‘I can’t believe that someone thinks I’ve got my shit together enough to do this job’ and I’m in my mid 50s (I am very good at the job though)

Of course they ‘understand’. They just think that women who struggle with a word that presupposes their maturity and think that being infantilised is a ‘compliment’ might want to crank up their thinking muscles.

Odd choice of inspirational quote there: Jack Lemmon’s Jerry - a man in a wig - was trying to convince himself he was a girl so that he wouldn’t make sexual advances towards Marilyn Monroe’s Sugar Kane. Not exactly bolstering the OP’s argument that she’s fine in classing herself a girl!

I’m another one of those fun-busting posters who finds the term ‘girl’ infantilising for adults. A ‘girl’ in her forties or fifties sounds insufferable.

Yes I think fun busting is right!

Not sure why you think you're in need of 'explaining' the film to me!!!

Get over yourself!

From the OP:
This thread has been inspired by another thread where the OP says he's confused by a girl at work, who is 41.

I'm in my late 40s, and I absolutely have moments where I'm surprised that I'm old enough to have the responsibility I do. I'm sure all of us have some form of imposter syndrome in our own lives.

But referring to a singular woman as a girl is infantilising - and I'm not sure I've ever come across a thread where someone has referred to their 40 something year old male colleague as boy.

Only if you still play with Barbies, OP. 😉

Aah, I was talking about this thread not a different one.

If someone wants to refer to themselves as a girl, fair enough, it doesn’t sit comfortably with me to hear someone referring to someone else in any way that they’ve not already expressed a desire to be referred to like that though.

I think being a girl is a state of mind. It retains the essence of who you were

I get that but, as I get older, I don't think "Im 62 but I feel 26" because I realise that this is what 62 feels like - I'm still me and have the same joie de vivre I had throughout my 20s, 30s.

I'm not a girl, though, I'm woman - hear me roar!

I with you op, until I look in the mirror or try to run 😂.
Enjoy being girlish as long as you want 👍

Well to be blunt if biological men can self identify as women then I see nothing wrong with a 50 year old biological woman self identifying as a 28 year old "girl ".

Also I guess a lot depends on people's mental definition of the word "girl" / "girls". Some view it as being under 16 / 18 playing with Barbies etc. Whereas others see it as including your 20's and partying with chums at the weekend etc.

We still say “girls nights” our group are 45-55 don’t really think about it. No one is so delusional as to think we still are like the under 40s though we stay current and are fit and active and do new things all the time.

If you have teens yourself you know the vast gulf there is between 16 and 50.

The thing that’s hard to watch is a 40 plus woman being coquettish, flirty and girlie - that’s absolute cringe. None of my friends would do that I’ve seen some of my mums acquaintances be like this - shudder.

I don't mind girl at all but then "woman" has bad connotations for me I think because when I was a kid my mum made a driving faux pas and got stuck blocking traffic and some bellend shouted "you stupid woman!" To me the word woman is just matter of fact and a bit cold. My nan used to call younger women "girls", everyone was young to her. It's literally only in the last few years people have suddenly decided they've got a problem with it. People be moaning about the word "girlfriend" next probably.

When I look in the mirror I now see my Gran staring back but inside I still feel like the 17 year old I was when I met my DH

I think it’s fine to use yourself, but patronising if someone else uses it - especially a man. I still say I’m going out with the ‘girls’ and we’re added between 47 and 53!

I can’t bear ‘lady’ and find that completely patronising.

If you're a 50 year old woman you will likely have navigated enough of lifes trails and tribulations and gained enough experience to have earned the right to see yourself as you wish, and take harmless pleasure in being female any way you like.
Personally I'm aware I've matured and I don't feel or look like a girl in my 50s, but I'm fine with that, happy to embrace this life stage.
But if you can look in the mirror and see a 28 year old, and that brings you joy, if you have the energy, sense of fun and zest for life you did decades ago and that let's you live the life you want to, then brava! I salute you.
People get very uncomfortable when older women refuse to melt invisibly into the shadows so youll get a lot of attempts to burst your bubble though.

Good luck to you OP, as long as you can run for a bus or not worry about 3 flights of stairs.
One point, Victoria Beckham, IMO she has been middle aged in attitude since she was 14.

I’m 42 and refer to myself and my female friends as girls.

Welllll.....now that you say that....I collect dolls and have over 100!

I just did a Guess My Age on Reddit but I forgot that my birth year is in my username, LMAO!!!!!!

Yes! I am cute and silly! So there! U are just a big grumpy meanie.

Oh really! I think you protest too Much!

I don't like being old. Its fucking horrible!

Who wouldn't rather being young again?

I have long hair and will do until the day I die, and I don't wear girly clothes bc I'm overweight, but would dress in a more feminine style if I wasn't. I would say feminine rather than girly. Kate Middleton's style.

I'm not coquettish and flirty. Not generally happy enough for that. I just feel 28!

I am delulu, yes, and OBVIOUSLY my worth is in my looks! I mean, what else really matters? 😂

It's not true that my worth is embedded in whether men find me attractive though, how dare you.

It's also embedded in whether WOMEN find me attractive! 😂

Crank up their thinking muscles! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Hang on a minute - what thinking muscles? 😂