Am I being unreasonable for wanting my friends to choose a more central meeting place?

79 replies

Twinklebird · 08/04/2025 05:28

Myself and my friends all live very far away from each other. Meet ups are nice but only 2-3 times per year. We normally meet in an area that is fairly equidistant for the furthest people including me.
The next meet up is to mark an occasion. Just a day trip. They have chosen a fancy place that is much nearer for everyone but much further for me. I never minded travel but just feel totally excluded. I would love a meet up but it just feels impossible. Do I suck it up and travel or stay home and miss out.
AIBU and how do I put my point across? All advice welcome.

OP posts:

CaptainFuture · 08/04/2025 14:31

converseandjeans · 08/04/2025 12:32

I imagine that it you didn’t go last time maybe they didn’t expect you to this time. I don’t know that a 40th is the right time to show off a baby? I don’t think I would expect a baby to be there (unless it is usually a mix of parents/babies/kids). That would be fine to take a baby if it’s family glamping but if it’s girls grown up drinks & nice food type weekend then I don’t know I would want a baby there. That’s not personal to you but maybe they feel the same way?

This, surely if it's a 40th birthday celebration, no-ones expecting a baby? Unless that's how you all normally do things?

Bingbopboomboomboombopbam · 08/04/2025 14:37

@Twinklebird with a baby a few weeks old I would have been annoyed, yes. But I’d just skip it as you can’t really make all of them change to something closer to you - the initiative should have come from them from the start.

100percenthagitude · 08/04/2025 14:38

Twinklebird · 08/04/2025 09:51

It's a 3 hour journey each way for me and less than an hour for everyone else. One person is an hour and a half. Normally when we meet in the middle it's 2 hours for me and 1 hr 30 or less for those furthest the other side. Some are only 10 minutes. Everyone has small families but right now I have the smallest as my baby is only a few weeks old.

So then this is not the norm, to give you longer to travel.

It's a special event birthday at a unique venue? That's feeling quite reasonable @Twinklebird

LuluDelulu · 08/04/2025 14:38

YABU. If you want them to meet the baby, you can host an event at yours.

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