AIBU to be tired of living next to other people?

[GrumpyNeighbourAgain]

Is anyone else tired of having neighbours? Has anyone else moved to somewhere more remote as a result?

My neighbours aren’t nearly as bad as some that I’ve had but they’re still grating on me. I don’t like kids and I’m tired of all the noise and accoutrements that come with them. Every week it feels like there’s another giant play item blocking my view and they also put it closest to my fence though there’s one side that has no one next to it.

I’m tired of screaming children. Why do children all seem to scream unnecessarily now and why does no one tell them to stop it?

Neighbour’s teenage kids shouting, laughing and talking at full volume coming home at 3am.

I’m tired of people’s motorbikes, garden parties and just noise in almost every form.

I wouldn’t mind having neighbours who are around, say 100 yards from me but not much closer.

Has anyone else moved more rurally/remote and was it worth it?

TIA

I’d love to do that. NDN one side has wired speakers in his garden so whenever it’s a nice day, I have to listen to his music. I generally wear earbuds when I’m pottering outside, listening to a podcast or an audiobook book and I can still hear it. I’ve spoken to him and he’s a selfish twat, he told me it’s his business what he does in his garden. Our houses are detached, gardens quite big, but thanks to his speakers, the music is all around the garden. We built a little pagoda in the bottom corner of the garden, furthest point from him a few years ago, installed a garden swing, a little bubbling rock water thing, under a mature tree, lovely and private and as quiet as it gets. Then last year the house at the back of us changed hands. The new owners have cut down all the trees their side and installed a garden room where the kids play drums and a trampoline. Yay. Their toddler shouts and screams constantly. Absolutely no peace outside now. I keep thinking their youngest will grow out of it, but I’ve had two boys and I don’t remember an ‘outside screaming at all hours’ phase. But completely rural houses are not in budget and you don’t know if you’re moving from being next to one noisy twat to another.

We live rurally after moving out from a city. We've just sat in our garden this morning listening to the wind rustling the trees and the birds singing and it's glorious. We do have neighbours, but very spaced out, and there's a fantastic community here. Everyone knows everyone else's business though, much more than we found when we lived in a city. I love it, but it wouldn't be for everyone.

People have become louder. I've lived happily in terraces before and I never heard my neighbours or they I and we all got on with living our lives. We weren't creeping around.

The house before this broke my health because of noisy neighbours. Even living in an apartment building with much more neighbours was quieter. All I wanted was to be able to open the french doors and not hear someone's else's music at full volume.

I moved and I'm now detached on a very quiet street. I'm semi rural but with amenities and close to a big city. It's bliss.

It really isn't. But is a mothers website really the best place to post this?!

We lived in various houses with neighbours, can't stand it. One lot had two kids with a record player and only three records which they played over and over through wafer thin walls.. To this day 'Sugar Sugar' still gives me the shudders.
two houses later we are in an old detached cottage up a farm track with one neighbour, who is quiet. Absolute bliss. I would rather live in a detached shed than in an attached house, or in a street.
if you can find something, go for it.

Noise cancelling headphones or loop earplugs are your friend. You can’t change your neighbours but you can manage how much you hear them. My DH is very noise sensitive and lives in his

No. I don't feel like that at all. I love living slap bang in the middle of the city centre of a busy city. Lots of stuff to do, noise too, but I feel like I'm living, not languishing forgotten in some remote farm, miles from everywhere, everything and everyone.

But tbh, my neighbours are decent people. I can hear normal everyday noises and they both have dogs who bark from time to time, but nothing excessive. Doesn't bother me at all. But if my neighbours would be partying nightmares - that's another story.

AND nature leaves me cold and bores me to tears, I'd rather do ironing or toilet scrubbing, then go on a 'countryside walk'. I love cities. And only move to the countryside (MAYBE) when I'm like 80.

I am equally mystified that so many parents these days seem to think repeated, ongoing screaming is acceptable. We had neighbours in a garden that backed onto ours for a few years who had three kids, and during COVID lockdowns the kids were often in the garden from early morning until late evening, shrieking and screaming almost non-stop. The parents weren’t even unaware of it, because on the one occasion I met the mother, the first thing she did was say ‘sorry about the noise’. But I never ONCE heard the parents ask the kids to keep it down in the garden. I don’t expect kids to be quiet all the time, but suggesting they be mindful of other people for at least a chunk of the day is basic human decency. And all the screaming and shrieking is totally unnecessary, kids can have plenty of fun without it! Our neighbourhood had ~20 gardens that all backed onto the same patch, and if a couple of households were out, it was a lovely place to be. If the family with the shrieking kids or the person who thought we all wanted to hear their loud music were in, we didn’t want to be outside. There were other families whose kids were fine.

The best for you is to move to a inner city, the last floor of a high rise. There is usually some road noise but it's all hum. You rarely hear kids because most families would want houses with gardens

If I did not have kids myself, I could say the same as you typed it, even knowing how horrible your post may sound to someone. But as one child suddenly developped PDA - lol

Yes. Most mothers know it's not ok to.lwt kids scream all day. Maybe we can teach those of you that don't....

We are moving from a city semi detached to a rural detached and I cannot bloody wait!

the quiet, the birds…heaven.

We moved 12 years ago because my DH felt much as you do. We live 6 miles from a market town with 1 quite detached neighbour and are surrounded by livery stables and horses. There is quite a lot of noise in the day time from horses, livery stables employees and their families, including children, the blacksmith makes a lot of noise once a month generally, but they all go home between 5 and 7 pm and then we have a gloriously quiet time until early the next morning, with an amazing wide view and quite a bit of wildlife (muntjac deer, foxes, rabbits, hares, house martins in the summer, red kites, owls, woodpeckers, badgers, frogs) which we really love. Great walks from the door, high levels of privacy, easy drive into town to get train for commute for work. Downside is the need to provide transport, driving lessons and then cars and insurance for the kids which is time consuming and expensive. Zero public transport. I’d like to stay here at least until we retire in 10 years or so.

Absolutely. I have lived in numerous flats all my life in another country before coming here ( eh, a maisonette, only two floors block but) I have never had noisy neighbours. People are ashamed of having bad fame in my country so even if they have problems, they hide them or just separate. Kids go out and play in playgrounds or streets because the gardens, both front and back are usually used as market gardens or small holding. So kids don't run and scream like mad????

We are in a small terrace, in a cluster of hmmmm maybe 6 rows of terraces.

so it does have the potential to be very noisy.

I was thinking just today we have always been very lucky with the amount of noise- sure there are moments, a one off party being noisy at midnight, a sunny day spoilt by a bloody power washer , or a yappy dog , but ultimately it’s fairly quiet.

I don’t know what helps this - possibly how small the houses are ? So as soon as people have kids they tend to move ( we bought it in 2007 and have never been able to borrow as much since ) They seem to attract couples.

I too would love no neighbours at all but I do know it could be worse

I totally get you OP. I'm desperate for solitude but not sure I can afford it. I live in a terrace and it's 60 a day smoking on one side and deaf person's ear splitting tv the other.
I bought some noise blocking ear phones but I can't block my nasal passages, I need to breathe.
Sometimes I just want to get my tent out and go somewhere very remote for a week on my own. We don't have screaming kids here but the adults make up for it.
I'm thinking of moving to Wales when I retire.

We moved from the suburbs, with inconsiderate noisy neighbours to a farmhouse surrounded by fields.
No near neighbours and no houses visible from anywhere in the house yet we live 2.5 miles from the nearest supermarket.
It is absolute bliss, been here 10 years and we'll not be moving again.

I live rurally and it is bliss. I really couldn't cope with hearing people around me all of the time.

Longing for no neighbours. Ours have 2 barky dogs, the walls are thin and they're into weed. I'm sure they are getting revenge on us for years of noisy kids though

This would be very area specific. Town and cities? Yes due to traffic mostly.

Rural areas? Villages? Not so much.

Also country specific, in some countries there’s a notable population decline so it won’t be noisier. In others, like much of Asia, it definitely will be noisier.

Peoples tolerance to noise is also a major factor. OP is either an extreme introvert or a miserable git 😂. She probably would have felt that way 50 years ago too.

We are in the process of moving to a house in a conservation area that backs on to arable farm land. Neighbours are probably 50+ metres away on each side side and we are separated by trees and hedgerows.

No more people parking right outside my front door, no more next doors kids in the garden before 7am, no more listening to others peoples music blaring from their gardens and no more constantly having to close the windows because outside stinks of weed.

I cannot wait for moving day!

I've lived in towns, cities, villages and now the coast. When I was a child we lived under a railway bridge and its fair to say I never noticed great big steam trains trundling over the top of our home. When in the city it was road noise and a few sirens, in the village farm noises and church bells. Now, on the coast the sound of the sea and holiday makers enjoying themselves. I like to hear happy giggling children having fun but what I can't abide is screaming children and noisy loud adults!

This is such nonsense. I've lived in estates with families my whole life. My kids used to play out on the street etc. The noise from kids nowadays is on a whole other level. My youngest is only 13 so it wasn't a million years ago that mine were out, they weren't allowed to roar and scream though.

Only just last night DH went out to the street to check everything was ok because a child was doing that high pitched horror movie screaming, he thought the child was seriously hurt...nope just 'playing' with another child. How the parents can stand it is beyond me. I'm used to it (hate it though) but he's usually at work when kids are out round here. It's completely different to how it was only a few years ago.

We live in the " Burbs Pretty quiet usually.decent NDN. However Some building work goes on sometimes .Dont mind DC objects to drilling ,banging and so on though!

Should we all be like PC? Bought a house next to Camillas "Bolthole" for 3 mil.Apparently Camilla was worried that the house (stately home) would be used for noisy weddings ,disturbing her peace and quiet!