Pink or no Pink

[LifesUturn]

My son is about to turn 3 and I'm getting him a balance bike he wants a very specific one which is a vintage style bike with a basket and is Pink with white tyres....his dad has outright said no because it's 'a girls bike' he has tried to show him others and has told him he isn't allowed Pink but he still picks the same one every time.....would anybody just buy the Pink or buy a different one and hope he likes it?

There's no set age but I'd transition him pretty much as soon as he can go fast and ideally glide on the balance bike.

My son started riding that balance bike just before 2 and transitioned to a pedal bike at 3.5.

just remember if you had a girl first, and a boy second, the boy will likely be riding a pink bike at that age whether he likes it or not.

He did the balancability thing at Butlins recently and struggled eith the balance bikes because of.how short his legs are but then I sat him on the 10inch one at smyths and he seemed too big so I was looking at the 12 but he was only 92cm the last he was measured in February

@LifesUturn Does he just want one with a basket, OP? If he also pointed out the same style in blue then it could just be that he wants one with a basket to put his stuff in.

I did the same with a “boy” bike that was acid green and black and had a little rack on the back. I didn’t care about the colour, I just wanted the rack! My mum wasn’t impressed so my dad found a purple one with a rack on and I was perfectly happy with that. 😂

The Decathlon one I linked upthread is 10" and my son happily rode it until he was 3.5. You can adjust the height of the saddle.

Honestly I would get that one and work on the basis that he won't be riding it for very long so you're buying cheap and cheerful and letting him cover it in stickers if he wants to. In a year's time you can upgrade him to a pedal bike and then the question of wheel size and frame colour will be more important because you'll want the bike to last longer.

It is fascinating the fuss over pink when traditionally pink was a boys colour. It was seen as softer red which was a very masculine colour. Blue was more feminine. Bonkers how it switched over 100 years ago and stuck

Too late to edit this comment but Decathlon also do a slightly fancier balance bike with brakes which comes in light pink if your son really has his heart set on that colour. They also do light pink helmets.

Personally I would plan for him to be riding the balance bike for so little time that it doesn't really matter what colour it is. But what is a little time to us can be a very long time when you're 3. The important thing is that the bike brings him joy in the here and now.

I'll show him some of the ones mentioned and find some nicer versions of the one he's chosen and let him decide from there. I've found the baskets online incase that is a major thing for him. Which may well be a selling point to him as he likes collecting things. But pink is seemingly winning. But I'll make sure he's sure on which before buying so that he keeps wanting it. I'll drill it into his dad he can't try and change his mind just because he doesn't agree. Thankyou everybody

https://www.decathlon.co.uk/p/kids-10-balance-bike-runride-500-pink-beige/_/R-p-313203

The pink version.

Weight definitely matters, especially if he's quite wee, so I'd check the weight on that one – lots are under 4 kg, a fair number under 3.5 kg. If that one's a bit heavy, adding a basket to a different could be a good shout.

How often is he likely to ride the bike? If you'd use it regularly, say as part of nursery drop off, he might only be on it for 6 months before he's ready for pedals. If it's more occasional or he's cautious, it could be a year or two.

Weight matters even more for a first pedal bike, incidentally. DD2 was confident on her balance bike, including the brake, but was right at the bottom of the size range when she moved up to pedals. Even on a very lightweight dinky Islabike, the weight took a bit of getting used to – and building enough leg strength to get up even the gentlest of hills.

Your poor child 😔

I’d be really concerned about raising kids with your husband.

🤣🤣🤣 indeed!

Indeed. One of my best friends is a gay man. He is married and his husband is a delight, and also a dear friend. Neither will do the ballet/opera/general arts performances with me. It is an outrage! I would replace them with better gay best friends, but the 20 + year friendship bit is tricky to replicate.

I’m surprised that people would ask a 3 year old to choose in this instance. I would have chosen the bike myself based on which size & weight would be most suitable, plus price & online reviews. Colour is the factor that I would put least emphasis on.

Like it or not, pink has become an emotive colour - avoid it for girls unless you want to smother them in gender stereotypes, but promote it for boys to show how woke you are. My DC (both girls) have gone through phases of loving pink, hating pink (and all it stands for) and are now thankfully at the ‘pink is just another colour’ stage.

My worry about letting him choose pink is whether he changes his mind about it before he outgrows the bike. But now you’ve let him know there are options, he’s likely to be disappointed if he gets the ‘wrong’ bike. So either get him the one he wants or take him somewhere that he can try them out for size first.

What’s wrong with a boy wanting a pink bike?

Do you have any future siblings that this may be passed on to? I would get him something more neutral / universal.

we had this issue with DC1 but didn’t get the pink one in the end. Got a red one that both kids have loved and used well - just make sure it’s as light as you can find so they can manage it easily . Mine were both riding by 3.5 having transitioned from a balance bike.

So your husband never ever pushed your son’s pram? Women’s work, was it?

Not even a little bit. Your poor child if you do different!

Its peculiar how baskets are seen as feminine

You know that discouraging your boy from having pink things won't make him like pink things any less, right? It will just make him think there is something wrong with him for liking pink things.

This is how you get four year old boys believing they are four year old girls.

Perhaps they are feminine if they have Barbies in them and masculine if they have dinosaurs in them.

Let me just be very clear. My comments are all hypothetical. My son hasn't asked for a pink bike and I haven't said no. He's got a pink monkey toy that he loves- I bought it for him. All I'm saying is in my opinion if he wanted a pink bike I would ask if he's sure he didn't want the blue/ more neutral bike. I would say no if he wanted a pink skirt, I think that makes me very normal!

But the OP has asked her son whether he's sure he wants the pink bike and he keeps saying yes.

This. We had this when my 3 year old nephew wanted a play kitchen and chose a pink “girls” one. His dad attempted to kick off but we told him in no uncertain terms that he was being an idiot. Nephew adored his little pink kitchen.