Do you wipe your bottom standing up or sitting down?

[justtheonequestion1]

Well, I thought this was an entirely uncontroversial topic, but my DH has discovered (through a conversation) that I stand up to wipe my bottom after going to to the loo.

Do you, for whatever reason, do the same? Or are you a sitter and you lean either forwards or to the side?

I feel as though there are multiple reasons to stand, perhaps you have mobility issues, a larger body, or it is simply your preference (like me).

Please tell me that at least some of you do this and I am not entirely abnormal!!

I sit - down your cheeks not move back together when you stand up? Making access harder than sitting when everything is erm, in position?

I use the moist toilet wipes too

Stand up.

oh come on, haven't you read that people on mumsnet only poo to a strict schedule in their own home when there's no one else around?!?

I actually think this is a rather helpful thread! The fact we’re too embarrassed to talk about such things are what leads to shame & confusion. Sounds like most people find what works for them. All sorts of reasons - disabilities etc impact how we do things. Do what works for you

Do you work at my office 🤣 the amount of times the bloody toilet gets blocked by someone! Maybe this is why! The thought of standing up blows my mind, the thought you can’t just reach round the back (obvs unless you have a disability) also blows my mind! And “flushable” wipes are a bloody nightmare and block drains….trust me the amount of times I’ve had dynorod out to my office to flush the drains out. I found this company called Wype and it’s fab you put it on your loo roll and feel super clean after and no wipes clogging up the drains

It’s probably also caused by germ phobics covering the seat with paper before sitting down.

I don't understand why people are needing to twist. I sit and lean forward. I don't need to twist anywhere! Although I do have abnormally long arms 😂I sometimes have problems finding long sleeve tops that fit right.

Never heard of anyone standing. Surely then you still need to bend forward?

Post in health or similar instead of aibu maybe.

Accept that you will get some joking responses to questions like this and just roll with it.

I’m very rarely gobsmacked but here we are.

Not in my wildest imagination would I have considered that people actually stand to wipe!! It defies human physiology.

Sitting/squatting spreads the cheeks and makes access so much easier. Standing restricts access. How short are your arms if you can’t reach your own bumhole?!

I have shortish arms and often find sleeves too long but I can reach my bum sitting down.

I haven’t used them my entire life. I tend to poo twice a day…once in work usually and once at home. So I’m using one nappy bag a day really and I use biodegradable bags. It’s the best I can do. I use the sanitary bin in work though.

I thought it was just me with my lack of mobility and flexibility. S(h)it and tip to one side for wiping but I've also got a portable 'bidet' which is a bit like a dental water flosser to flush nooks and crannies. Don't get them mixed up though!

Potentially it could be! Everyone assumes it’s the men’s that will be blocked 9/10 times it the women’s. But the issue with the drains being blocked by “flushable” wipes is also a nightmare

I have been thinking about this thread during a call and have realised why I stand (other than I think that's how I was taught). I always found the idea of putting your hands anywhere near the toilet bowl grim. Surely to wipe your hand needs to go basically inside the bowl? Really close to the poo and dirty water?

I remember watching a film years ago where the woman nipped to the loo for a pee and wiped sat down and I shuddered but assumed it was just because she was drunk in the plot.

I also rarely see anything on the paper, and definitely no shit smushing. I really want a bum gun now though.

I do kind of a ballet point with one leg, that seems to be sufficient.

I have been thinking about this thread during a call and have realised why I stand (other than I think that's how I was taught). I always found the idea of putting your hands anywhere near the toilet bowl grim. Surely to wipe your hand needs to go basically inside the bowl? Really close to the poo and dirty water?

This is why you wash your hands after using the loo.

I remain seated. I use the Angela Kilmartin method though and you need to sit. (And if anyone is plagued with UTIs, her book changed my life!).

Just from a curiosity perspective, I think I may try standing next time I need the loo. I honestly didn't know it was a thing so I just have to give it a go. Might be a revelation!

a) wash your hands
b) yes technically your hands go inside the bowl but nowhere near the poo or the water unless you have giant hands and/or giant turds

This is quite revolting. It was a joke on Daisy May Cooper’s second series of AIBU and at the time I thought ‘As if anyone does that!’ But it seems you stand-up-wipers are legion. Weird, the lot of you! I wonder if Daisy May Cooper is following this thread?

Yes also is it any more grim than handling your shitty arsehole? As you say this is why we wash hands afterwards!

Stand up

You seem very keen to quiz individuals on further toilet habits - even asking the consistency of their poo. Grim

Not 'grim' at all. It's a discussion on life experience.

😂😭😂😭