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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To say I’ve had enough of adhd

106 replies

Adhdohno · 28/03/2025 19:56

I am ready to leave it’s been 20 years, my oh has adhd I have had enough- 5 times today I’ve had to stop what I’m doing to fetch my 1 year old off the stairs as oh keeps forgetting to close the safety gate.
he can’t find anything, I’ve spent 20 years finding his things, same story every morning can’t find his keys, accuses me of hiding them. Today I have sat watching him look for his shoe when I can clearly see it. I’m at my wits end.
the baby has tipped a full glass of juice over himself what oh has left on the floor, guess who has to change him… while oh simply drys the juice with a towel not actually cleaning it properly. Next the baby has his fingers in a can what oh has left within reach.
he can’t remember a conversation about the kids Easter eggs what we had yesterday.
to top it all off my eldest son also has adhd and the noise is driving me insane.

OP posts:
LePetitMaman · 29/03/2025 10:40

WaxCh1ll1 · 29/03/2025 10:36

Any adhd foundation that isn’t aware of what I posted is deeply concerning. Which foundation is it?

Some of us have many years teaching experience of children with SEN,a lot of interaction with services whilst supporting our own struggling ND children.

Who says they aren't aware of the most basic information? What a funny concept.

That's all you can interpret, despite what's written down.

crisantemi · 29/03/2025 10:46

Is there a children's neurodiversity topic on MN - I can't see one?

Jimmyneutronsforehead · 29/03/2025 11:10

crisantemi · 29/03/2025 10:46

Is there a children's neurodiversity topic on MN - I can't see one?

I think it's just the SEN board.

ThirdCoffeeThisMorning · 30/03/2025 10:31

' can’t find his keys, accuses me of hiding them.'

This is clearly not an ADHD symptom. Insisting that all behaviours need to be seen as ND and accomodated by others is naive at best and dangerous at worst...

Spring025 · 30/03/2025 11:31

I used to lock myself out all the time, it wasn't a case of having someone else to think for me so I didn't have to as there wasn't going to be anyone all day to let me back in. It took me a few years to get into the mindset of always thinking of my keys before I left and I haven't been locked out for a very long time now. If we moved house though I'd probably be back to the beginning again and have to retrain myself not to forget the keys to that house as all the cues would be different. Haven't tested that theory though.

Losing shit is typical with poor executive function OP, which in turn is extremely common with ND conditions. I don't know why anyone would say only 20% of what your DH is doing is ADHD related as clearly most of it is due to poor executive function.

LePetitMaman · 30/03/2025 11:45

Spring025 · 30/03/2025 11:31

I used to lock myself out all the time, it wasn't a case of having someone else to think for me so I didn't have to as there wasn't going to be anyone all day to let me back in. It took me a few years to get into the mindset of always thinking of my keys before I left and I haven't been locked out for a very long time now. If we moved house though I'd probably be back to the beginning again and have to retrain myself not to forget the keys to that house as all the cues would be different. Haven't tested that theory though.

Losing shit is typical with poor executive function OP, which in turn is extremely common with ND conditions. I don't know why anyone would say only 20% of what your DH is doing is ADHD related as clearly most of it is due to poor executive function.

Because that's not the bit that's causing the issue.

The DH losing things is one thing.

The DH losing things, getting angry and turning on OP "it's you isn't it, you've hidden them from me" is quite another.

The former is typical of ADHD. The latter is just being an arsehole.

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