Seriously thinking about leaving the UK - AIBU?

[HonoraBridge]

I love the UK in many ways but it has been going downhill for at least 20 years and it feels as if the speed of the decline is accelerating. I no longer see a happy, or particularly safe, future here. For the first time in my life, I am very seriously thinking about leaving the UK and that feeling gets stronger day by day. When I mention this to friends, many are feeling the same way. YANBU - you are right to think seriously about leaving the UK. YABU - the UK is a still a great country to live in and you are being unreasonable to want to leave.

Enjoying life in the UK, quite obviously.

🤫 Don't tell anyone!

@BatchCookBabe I feel guilty about that every day.
We didn’t leave the U.K. by choice - my husband is military and we got posted.
We are now 5,500 miles away from my parents and I feel guilty every day that we took their grandchildren away from them 😔😔
They can afford to visit once a year, which I am incredibly grateful for and there is always happy tears all round at the airport…but then when they have to leave? It honestly feels like my stomach has fallen out of my arse, and seeing my children cry and be so sad knowing it will be a year before they see their grandparents again breaks my heart.
And then there’s the other aspects of homesickness you don’t expect initially, especially in a westernised, English-speaking country. I miss random foods from home, I miss pub culture, I miss British sports events, I miss British humour and banter with strangers - I still do not feel at home here and I don’t think I ever truly will.

But you will be a migrant elsewhere

are you just expecting another country to welcome you with open arms?

the absolute hypocrisy

Are you saying the UK is the best place in the world to live? Have you ever been outside of it?

In general Polish and Romanians have good levels of education and superior language skills. Families also worked elsewhere in EU and then invested their money back home taking back bilingual kids. Service jobs employing multi-lingual people at very reasonable costs make that attractive to companies in other countries. Living in previously shit circumstances encouraged people to move, to work harder, to improve themselves, maybe to live in an HMO and save every penny. And then to come back and invest in their own communities. I went to Pristina (Kosovo) last year and there are some cocktail bars that wouldn't look out of place in Paris or London.

On MN every day I read of people who can't answer their own phone unless they know who it is, or speak to a friend without drama, or answer the door....There's a lesson there somewhere...

We're not quite there yet...

14 years of austerity.
17 years since the financial meltdown.
Labour only in for 9 months.
Labour front loading public spending.
Billions being spent on the NHS.
Waiting lists already coming down.

It is getting better. You just can't see it yet.

Oh dear. Things are not getting better at all.

I don’t doubt your statistic that 54% are net recipients. But that’s not the same as ‘contributing nothing’. It just means ‘receive more than they contribute’. It might be £1 more. Is that not right? Or am I missing something?

I’m not sure how your statistic is calculated, but I suspect it’s Tax Paid compared to Benefits Received. Is that right? In which case would a person working full time on minimum wage be in that 54% if they had a child living with them in their household who was in state school? Or would it just be if they received in direct financial benefits more than the £3,391 a minimum wage salary contributes in tax? Or is it more complicated than that?

FWIW I think the problem is inequality more than anything. You say that ‘You won’t have a good standard of living if I take 50% of your wealth and give it to the family next door’. Well, aside from the fact that wealth (as distinct from income) is very much under-taxed, I don’t agree with your statement in principle if, as is often the case, the wealthy have more than a good standard of living. If some of the 46% (say the top 10%) have a solid gold lap of luxury six star hotel standard of living, surely they could still have a great standard of living even if you took away 50% of their wealth (which, by the way, nobody is suggesting)? And wouldn’t that be fair if it meant that some of the 54% went from ‘shit standard of living’ to ‘slightly better standard of living?’

The tide is turning but somehow I don't think corporations are going to increase wages :)

NZ has the highest rate of emigration of any first world country.

Thank you @Mightymoog I am not sure. It’s at least 8 years before the youngest will leave and they’ll probably go to a nearby university knowing my luck and I’ll end up staying. It makes me sad but this is the life I chose I guess. Maybe in 15-20 years but by then my country may be unrecognisable.

Why does Norway not have Government debt ?

Sky high taxes
a cracking safety net
limited foreign ownership of businesses

now look at the UK again

You don't think the fact that Norway has large oil deposits has anything to do with their national wealth?

Yes, and NZ is in recession, I believe.

No country is going to be perfect. Not to say someone can't be happier (or unhappier) elsewhere, but the most important thing is to look inside. If there's something inside you that is restless, you will take yourself with you and maybe whatever drove the move in the first place.

Grass maybe greener but still needs mowing. What would you do? How much are you paid? Is it hot or cold? Expensive to live or cheap. Healthcare, housing, crime, roads, transport?

Wherever you go, there you are.

Surely the private sector needs to be thriving not this, which is under strain from policies halving growth.

They had all spent quite a bit of time there and loved it. Here in the West we are mostly only shown negative images of African countries. Some people’s minds would be blown if they saw how amazing some places are out there. These were very intelligent young people who had spied a future opportunity.

That just isn’t true though. Happiness and quality of life ranks significantly higher in many many other countries than the UK. The economy is stronger, health is better etc etc in many places. The UK is not the best place to live by far! So many better options.