Vaguely inspired by Adolesence, but also by a slight family debate ...what time would you let a 14 year old walk home alone?

[mydogfarts]

Just pondering really as a difference of opinion in my wider family on this came up just during the week there has been a lot of chat about adolesence...

Until what time in the evening would you be happy to let a 14 year old walk home on their own? Would it vary depending whether they are a boy or a girl?

I realise area is relevant so the area in question is fairly boring suburbia, and the walk home that caused some debate would take about 20 minutes

For the purpose of the AIBU, would you be ok if it was a boy and they were setting off from their friends at 9.15 pm ?
(But am also interested to hear ideas of what times are reasonable)

If it was dark, I’d be picking mine up, and it would be at a time that suited the rest of the family. Like younger siblings needing to be in bed.

That's a good point - it was dark (it's a recent dilemma)

(Nb not my child but have offered to give the lifts if it solves the debate!)

Boy or girl, it sounds ok to me; though as above , I’d feel more comfortable if it were still light outside and the route was not isolated in parts.

Assuming ok area and they’ll text when they leave, I think I’d be ok with this. More comfortable if they were location sharing. Also would want to know that they were visible if doing any road walking for example.

DD is 15. She is not allowed to walk home in the dark, one of us will meet her. We are in inner-city London though.

I wouldn't want my 15 year old dd walking home in the dark. I would pick her up.

My son was in army cadets at 14. It finished at 9pm and he was allowed to walk home. We live in a leafy surrey. Most of the boys and girls seemed to walk home.

In the dark, I'd probably collect them. During the summer, no issue at that time.

My son did sports training until 9pm Tuesdays and Thursdays. He walked home alone. (They all did).

boring village where nothing ever happens.

daylight and no isolated routes.

Ive driven other people’s teen’s home that were planning to walk from my house. I’m not going to be responsible for a young girl walking home in the dark on one of our country roads.

If it’s dark I used to pick mine up from wherever they were. They had more freedom in the summer but at that age 8-9pm latest.

DD was in cadets at 14 in the city centre, and they needed collecting before being released until 16.

I would pick up if it was dark.

Yes it did strike me on the programme how the girl left her house at 8:30pm. There’s no way I’d have been allowed to do that at 13 years old.. definitely at 15 ish but not before that.

Before dark.

Except when it was mid Dec then I was happy for him to walk in the dark till about 6pm as long as it was a familiar route and max 15 minute walk (1 mile)

At 14 both my dc of both sexes got themselves home at 9 15 when they were y10s.

Mine is just about to turn 14. I’m happy until just after 8. But if it’s weekday I would want her home before then anyway.

That was the one thing I picked up in adolescence- why on earth is a 13year old at at 10pm? My ds2 is the exact same age and that is far too late imo. His phone locks at 8pm (we increase each year in line with their school year, he’s in year 8 so it locks at 8pm), so he would have to be home by then.

We live in a relatively safe area and we don’t let our 16 year old daughter walk home alone. We are shocked at how many of her friends are allowed to, even as late as midnight. We did allow our older sons to walk home as late as eleven as teenagers but we do live in a quiet area.

Totally depends where the 14 year old is walking too. I'd be happy for him to walk back from a friends a few roads away, but I would not allow wandering around the town centre.

Our way is full of people doing quick drug drops on corners.

DS (14) walks home from a youth group at 10pm. About 10 minutes walk. Sometimes with a friend and sometimes not. We are in a suburb of a major city. I think it’s fine.

My DS has sports training that finishes between 8.30 and 9. I let him walk home in the dark when he was 14 but walk is well lit and pretty busy (London Z2).

Well my kids grew up in London, l was working so at secondary school in winter they were walking home in dark.
By 14/15 they were walking home at 9/10pm alone sometimes, normally with fiends, obviously l would have met them if they wanted me to.

Mine brought themselves home at 14, on foot or using public transport. Both girls, lived in the suburbs of medium city. They weren’t allowed to cut through the park but otherwise if they were old enough to be out, they were old enough to get themselves home in my opinion

Mine would all have been travelling home some point between 9/10pm at that age.
London suburbs so we have buses and free travel; no need for walking through parks or alleyways