Sister in law using same baby name

[Funinthesun20]

My sil has just given birth to my beautiful niece she and my brother have practically named the baby the same as my daughter 7.

Im talking close naming, think Grace/Gracie, Sophia/sophie, Rose/Rosie, Isabel/Isabella, Ella/Ellie….

Now, I know no-one has a right to a name and I know I don’t, that’s not what I’m saying, and I’m not even mad, just really confused! Surly when they were looking at names, they thought that one’s just like our nieces, not that one then? Like my husbands nephew is Theo and we liked Leo, but we thought that’s too close so moved on to other names.

Mine and my family’s reaction probably should have been better. But I was in complete shock when they told her name. I wasn’t rude, but my face said it all!

But the way they (sil and brother) are now acting as if they don’t have a clue why anyone would comment/react. As a lot of people are, as in family friends, wider family, even my work colleagues. Even my daughter is a bit confused “why does the baby have almost the same name as me?”
My mum is now laughing about having to list her grandchildren and say two with practically identical names!

I don’t know the point to this post I’m just…. Venting.

Do they share the same surname too?

This is a non-event.

Your DB and SIL have no imagination, and although I can understand why you are not happy about it, there isn't a lot you can do about it.

i know two brothers who each have a child with very similar first names (Eva/Evie type similar), and the same middle name and surname. The names are nice enough but very ordinary.
Another set of two brothers have two children with rhyming names (Cara and Sara type similar). The cousins have the same surname and work together.

It's not like there is a shortage of names to use.

I think it happens because they know they 'shouldn't' use it and the name sort of becomes far more attractive because of that.

same here - 6 months apart, very similar names. Nobody cares. Live and let live

I agree - Gracie is just a nickname of Grace so I would be pissed off about that

Ella is a different name to Ellie, Eva is a different name to Evie (in my mind).

so I think it depends on the name but I understand the annoyance. I would just answer your daughter with oh they must love your name so much when she asks why the baby’s is similar.

@BringMeTea , to you maybe, but if it was your DD and your niece, you might feel differently.

I think it’s funny, but cute. Although I named my son second in a line of similar names (think Joanna, John, Joan) but the second 2 are more alike. It’s kind of common when people are named after someone, so I’d take it as a sign of affection and tell your daughter they chose the name because they know how great she is

Not something I would do and it does seem unusual but there is nothing you can do about it, other than take it as a compliment!

If I think about my group of cousins (born in the 80s), there is an Ella, an Eleanor and an Emma. It has never been a big deal at all!
She probably just loved that name. Be nice; she’s a new mother and you have a beautiful new niece.

I wouldn't be remotely bothered by this. It would be a total non-issue.

I also cannot see why you couldn't have used Leo if you had a nephew called Theo. They might rhyme, but that's surely not an issue. They are not the same name at all.

Do you live in the same part of the country? Or even in the same country?

It might be a little bit odd if you're expecting to see each other every day but if, like myself and my children, you see your cousins a couple of times a year at best because they have always lived hundreds of miles away, I can't see it will have any effect at all.

My kids grew up quite happily with two uncles with the same name, one on either side. Obviously nobody knew about this at the time of naming, but they never found it remotely difficult to cope with.

If concerned about this, you could call your child "Orange".

I think it is odd that they would choose a v similar name. If I were them I’d feel a bit embarrassed so I’m not sure why people do this. It would irritate me yes but as you know you don’t “own” a name.

However, YABU to put this on your SIL (as per your title) - your brother is equally responsible surely? You probably did this subconsciously but probably something you should consider.

I think it's also potentially an added complication in that traditional names and their pet forms have become very much blurred over the past decade or two.

Not all that long ago, you would virtually never have met somebody with the official birth certificate name of Bobby, Charlie, Evie or Tommy - although they were commonly called that - but now, parents will frequently give them as actual official names.

?? Sorry, I don't understand this comment.

I've also said that the whole thing would not bother me, so not concerned about anything. 🫤

One of my nephews has the exact same name as my partner, and none of us care.

Everyone will get used to it. Just let it go.

Famously, nothing rhymes with "orange".

complete non event. My DC have two cousins with exactly the same name but pronounced differently (think Lisa being Leesa or Lysa). One of my DC has exactly the same name, including surname, as her dad's cousin's dc. I have the same name as my mum's best friend's daughter, they always said I was named after her because she was so lovely.

I understand why you're a bit bothered by it. Unless it was a family name or some very specific reason they could have simply picked another name. Very few people have only one name in the world they like. It’s unfair to their kiddo too because your daughter is older so they’re daughter will probably have some modifier like baby Ella or little Ella. Weird they didn’t say it to you either. My kids have cousins they don’t really see that much and who have different surnames. I still would not choose essentially the same name.

I think they could have picked any other name in the world.

Nothing you can do, and nothing you should do.

Its a name, why shouldnt they use a name they like?

We have multiple or similar of a lot of names in our family - no one cares.

It’s possible it genuinely didn’t occur to them. I had a name on my list that was very similar to DC’s cousin (think Luke/Lucas) and when my DH saw my list he said: er, no… too close to nephew! But if he hadn’t pointed it out I might not have thought of the connection because to me they just seemed like different names.

I don't see an issue.
I did have a wobble when the name I liked for my 3rd son was similar to that of my nephew (on DH's side - whom we don't see often. )
But then I realised my DH has a very similar name to his cousin on his Dad's side.
So in the grand scheme of things it doesn't really matter.