Please, please, please put away your phones...

[User63859]

Just witnessed a mother (and father) totally ignore their 18 month old (ish) child on the tube. Both of them totally engrossed in their phones. The baby was sat up in a buggy, awake (at 11pm but that's another issue) and had moments of trying to get their mother's attention. At one point the child leaned out of the buggy and buried its head in its mother's lap.

Not even a flinch from the mother. So concerned with scrolling (looking at a fashion website fwiw), she literally didn't even make eye contact.

It was heartbreaking. What are we doing to our children? Before all the late night trolls start piling in I'm not saying I'm a perfect parent, we all have our weaknesses, but witnessing this has literally made me so so sad. I think what made me even sadder is the fact the baby just seemed to accept it. They tried to get the smallest acknowledgment from their mother, failed so just sat there staring into space. Oh, and watching their mother prioritise a bit of metal over them.

Please, for the love of whatever, put away your phones. We all like a scroll and a moan on mumsnet but do it when your kids are in bed. I'm so tired of seeing all this shit parenting and worrying about what a messed up world my son is going to grow up in.

To those that are guilty of this, one day you will long for these days back again and by then it will be too late and you'll be wondering why your kids need so much therapy.

Be better, please.

Neglecting your child on a train at 11pm at night by scrolling your phone and completely ignoring their attempts at trying to get your attention, is not a case for SS or the 'pigs' as your delightfully call them.

However, that doesn't mean it's not neglect.

Really worrying that you can't see this.

I never said that, you've got the wrong person. Anyway, your examples are just ridiculous.

So condescending !! Last year we spend a whole day and night in hospital after a miscarriage, we stopped on the way home , young child and toddler in tow to get breakfast, we where mentally and i physically exhausted , trying to hold the tears , my hubby trying his best to support me , we stopped because he very own was starving and I wanted to be able to get home without needing to worry about food .
I’m sure to many we looked like awful parents as we gave them a phone and my oldest was on her iPad the whole time .Not something we would normally allow , I don’t think we said a word to each other the whole time , I think if we did we would just break down there and then . We were simply trying to survive an awful day .
My point is you should never judge people in a few minutes interactions . That baby might have the world if attention most of the time and just be with exhausted parents this time . Nobody is perfect

Called the pigs? I can't believe what you've just written. That is so so so immature. Not to mention offensive.

Sorry, I thought you was the same poster. I just gave the reasons my own DC have been out past their bed time. I think car accidents and A&E visits are pretty common occurrences, wouldn't you agree?

If car accidents and a&e visits are common occurrences for you that’s pretty concerning

Not for me. For people, in general. This is getting silly now.

It's not something I'd judge, especially at 11pm. People aren't typically out and about with toddlers at that time so I'd assume they've had a hell of a day for whatever reason.

It's also interesting and not at all surprising that the mother is getting harshly judged and the father doing the same thing is barely an afterthought. Some pp's don't even mention him at all but have plenty to say about the mum.

I think @MyLoyalBird is overtired. That and very rude / deliberately trying to be offensive.

Let's all just sit and scroll on our phones and ignore them and then they might go to sleep...

That's about your level of understanding.

I think that sounds awful! Poor kid trying to get attention.

I find lots of instances of parenting like this and just turn a blind eye. I bring up my kid how I like and it is opposite to that, making sure my DC know how important they are to me and that mummy is always ready for a cuddle or play. I have a DH who loves his phone (who doesn’t!), but will always put our DC first and pay attention and the phone is put aside. It is just a rectangle with lights after all, no need to be glued to it 24/7.

I agree with you! I also wonder if parents being addicted to phones could be an area that is often unspoken about but must influence how children are being bought up today.

Again, I am not perfect at all, but I would only be on my phone with my baby if it’s related to making our way to wherever we are going, or if they are asleep strapped in and we are on a long journey I might catch up on messages.

I would love us to explore this more. I know it’s just a snapshot of those parents lives, but it may not be for others.

This.

How are you teaching I.T ?

Just the other day I saw a video where a woman was walking on totally engrossed in her phone....a man was calling out to her Few times and running after her she finally looked back he shouted Wtf woman what you playing at? Walking off and leaving your child behind...she then realised and ran, picked her child up (looks under 2) walks off and still on her phone 🙄 The addiction to these devices are unreal....

Yeah that child will have issues because their mother wasn’t interacting with them
phones are the new cigarette but worse

Firstly I am really sorry for what you went through. I know the pain of a miscarriage only too well. You were surviving an unimaginable pain and just going through the motions of the day. I highly doubt that if someone had seen your familythat day they would have judged you in that manner.

I disagree that my post is condescending when the majority of posters on this thread agree that people are more focused on their phones. Not all parents are the same, some find it easier allowing IPads to babysit their children. You can’t say that you haven’t seen examples of this yourself.

Why wouldn't they have potentially judged her? They would've had no idea what was going on in her life, just as no one has any idea of what is going on for the family in OP to be on the tube at 11pm with a toddler in the first place.

I hate seeing people scrolling on their phones in restaurants. Groups of friends and families all engrossed in their screens and not to mention young kids glued to iPads.