If you don’t contribute to the collection you shouldn’t sign the card

[fartfacenotfatface]

I was tasked with organising the office whip-round for a colleague’s special occasion. I shared my bank details on the office WhatsApp and popped a card and my favourite biro in the tea room.
30 people signed the card but only 5 have pinged me any money.
I don’t know why, but it’s bugging me. When we pass on the gift and card, the recipient will no doubt assume that most of the office have contributed when in reality only a small handful have. The cost of the gift is irrelevant here as one office member has been especially generous with their contribution so we can still buy a nice gift. I’ve not disclosed to anyone information about many people have contributed.

YABU - anyone can sign the card. It’s the thought that counts.
YANBU - you should only sign the card if you’ve contributed to the collection for the gift.

It's difficult. I can't afford to give a tenner to people in other departments but do wish them well.

I don’t think it matters.
You’d probably get more contribution if they could chuck some change in an envelope. Some people don’t want to share bank details or cba setting up a new recipient.

It’s the week before payday for a lot of people, things might be getting a bit tight

Hmmm I think I agree with you. But yes a cash option usually helps

Well, for a start I wouldn’t have used my own bank account for this, everyone at my work uses an online payment platform (go fund me maybe).

I think you sound a bit precious about it, to be honest. “My favourite biro”? Popping and pinging??

If this is happening I would create a list of names at the beginning of the year

Go around the whole office and ask if they want to be part of the birthday club

Collect £2.50 from each - tick their name off

Those who don’t pay to join don’t get a card or gift and your list goes on the wall of who is in the birthday club

The 2.50 each will be used to buy the cards

Alternatively a nice little post it near the card in staff room

‘please only sign if you contributed’

Set up a proper way of contributing like one of them online gift card contributions. I wouldn’t transfer money into a colleagues account to contribute to a gift.

also not everyone can afford to put in - if everyone did but someone only put a couple of quid in you’d be on here moaning so they’re getting judged whatever they do.

Simple don't be the organiser then you won't have the worry.
Let someone else do it.

Having to do bank transfer is probably putting people off. Or they signed, thinking I'll do it later then forget.

I think people prefer dropping an unknown amount in an envelope to avoid embarrassment if they only want to put a quid in for whatever reason. So its difficult about the signing as if only 5 sign the card it will look sad .

A birthday club like that worked well at one of my last workplaces.

no, I don’t think people should only sign if willing to donate. Lots of heartfelt messages for a colleague leaving today but only 5 donations. I added £50 myself as she was one of my direct staff and has been a God-send to me. I was happy for people to sign. It can get expensive. I have around 100 people in my teams and have donated £100 this month, money for flowers for bereavements, leaving gift as above, and adoption leave. I don’t expect everyone to donate and I always sign off from the whole team.

I often sign cards without giving to the collection. Depends who it is really. Large workplace with many occasions. Not everyone gives to every collection but most sign the cards.

People are feeling broke, so less likely to feel generous about donating money to a colleague’s special occasion. That doesn’t mean they don’t want to send good wishes though, and the recipient is still likely to appreciate seeing all their colleagues names on their work card, so everyone should be allowed to sign.

Could the more generous person have transfers on behalf of other who wanted to use cash?

I don't contribute.

Those few I am close to, I usually make a cake but our office always sends a card around to sign for each employee's birthday. Maybe 100 staff. I cannot afford £500 on people I barely know.

And I don't have time to faff around with a bank transfer.

People might want to express their congratulations/birthday wishes/sorry you’re leaving thoughts (even if that’s just by signing their name in a card) without making a financial contribution. And that’s totally okay!

Nah.

It.would be rubbish for the recipient to receive a card with just a few signatures. I appreciated the messages in the card more than the gift usually.

It's such a prissy attitude - if all people give is well wishes, then that's fine by me.

You are unreasonable for mentioning your "favourite biro", like it's amusing.

I think good wishes for a birthday are a gift themselves, but understand others might feel differently.

I'd be happy buying a pack of cheap birthday cards (10 for £1 at card factory or you can buy big mixed boxes) and letting anyone who wanted to sign - don't think gifts are necessary and the endless money collecting usually bugs people.

That way birthday wishes are expressed to people at very little cost - they feel happy, minimal expense, minimal resentment or hassle.

It depends a lot on how you described it.

Im sorting a card and gift for Elsie. If you want to participate sign the card and transfer me the money, here’s the bank details for contribution.

is very different to.

Elsie is leaving. There’s a card next to the coffee machine for anyone who wants to send best wishes. If you want to contribute to a gift here’s the info.

There’s at least 30 people in your office/workplace. People probably get fed up with handing cash over all the time but would still like to wish a happy birthday

I’m sure the recipient would feel just great if they got a card with three well wishers names on!

All the collections always been in cash. Lock the card away so only certain colleagues (always two as then covers most hours) have access to it. So colleagues had to donate to the collection.

It was easy for working at a supermarket to buy some of the gifts there as able to use cash to pay, plus use of discount card

Well I don’t really like the idea of recognising birthdays etc, if you work in a large enough team then it’s always someone’s birthday and it gets tiresome and expensive to keep being asked.

OP you say this is for a “special occasion”, that sort of thing can be particularly contentious because there isn’t always a consistent approach towards how these things are recognised, so that might be why people are not donating.

I really only like to recognise people leaving. And at my work, there are two different teams working in the same office. Normally everyone would sign a card but only people in your own team would even be asked to donate.

I’ve only been in charge of collecting once (did that through sharing bank details) and found that most people were quite generous. Economic times were different though!