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DH finally said he will think about us getting a cat after 15 years of me wanting one

129 replies

SpottyDottyMoon · 17/03/2025 19:40

DH has always, I’ve felt, dangled the possibility of us getting a cat like a carrot and stick. I adore cats and have wanted one for many years, wanted our children to grow up with pets.

He’s always said things like “when I can prove I could look after it” and that he would probably end up looking after it and I wouldn’t bother with it, like I would completely ignore it or not feed it.

He’s also said stuff like “when I prove I can keep a tidy and organised house he might think about it”

He doesn’t like cats or animals in general which is fine but now all of a sudden he’s decided he’s ready to “think about” getting a cat after 15 years of my asking, trying to talk him around, our children begging for one and now I’ve given up on the idea! I basically would rather get one on my own terms and not have someone dangling the possibility just slightly out of reach for years.

Every needs to be on board too surely? He’s now put out that I won’t discuss this anymore and says I probably never wanted one in the first place!

OP posts:
Alwaysalert · 10/06/2025 12:59

Please do not get a cat(s) until he has left or been thrown out as I worry now that if you just went and got a cat(s), especially if you fell head over heels with it/them- and you would - he would do something to harm it/them or let it/them out and it/they would get run over. I was always a dog person until I got a cat(s). All were different and l have had so many different personalities - some demanding, some just cuddle monsters, some aloof (but ony for a few minutes). I absolutely adored them all and my current 2 moggies (all black and a bengal) I got during pandemic after losing my 2 x almost 15 year old girls - mongrel dogs. I got these 2 cats who were 4 months old online then as all rescues closed and my workplace had closed and i hated WFH and they honestly saved my life. I would never ever take that shit from someone who clearly does not love you or he would not say those awful things. At the moment I am wrestling with my female all black cat as she wants my attention and is trying to get in front of the laptop so I can't type, just stroke her. She is very demanding - all the time, but she puts up with me and my moods are up and down, the Bengal will not let me read the paper or use my laptop and sits on both to stop me. But when I tell him off, he puts his head to the side and looks at me so adoring that I forgive anything. Get rid of the toxic person who holds you to ransom, get a cat and find true happiness.

MrsSlocombesCat · 28/08/2025 13:25

This is not a cat issue it's a husband issue.

TreatTreat · 28/08/2025 13:26

What a controlling twat. Why are you still with him?

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 28/08/2025 14:38

DH "I'm considering allowing you a cat"

You "That's nice dear. I'm considering divorce.... "

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