Daughter is wearing inappropriate bikini on family holiday.

[romma]

We are going on holiday to Cyprus and daughter has bought a bunch of thong style bikinis, she’s a teenager but how do I talk to her about it. As there will be extended family

The OP has already said that she does intend to wear something similar. Unless she never takes off her sarong.

It’s not lying. It is important not to shame a young woman if she looks beautiful it is good to tell her. But it is also good to let her know that sometimes family members both male and female can feel unsettled by the sexualised appearance of young family members who they have known since childhood. Everybody will need to adjust but there is no point in pretending that there is not an adjustment that needs to be made whatever that is.

Spoiler - Uncle Mike planning on strutting his stuffing in a teeny Speedo thong 🤣

Can you threaten to wear one as well if she wears one - I would have died seeing my Mum in a thong at that age 😅.

Oh god not the teenager in a thong bikini thread AGAIN. Always the same creepy posts. Ugh ugh ugh. Don’t feed it!

You say in your OP “she’s a teenager” as if she’s about 14/15.

For goodness sake she’s an adult! She’s old enough to vote, buy alcohol, gamble, apply for a mortgage. She should be able to wear what she wants (given it’s legal in the county you’re visiting) without scrutiny from her family.

You sound ridiculous infantilising her. Unless you have some really dodgy and pervy relatives you’re concerned about that will be on the holiday? If not, then what she wears is none of your concern and remove the stick from your arse!

‘She’ 👀

🧐

FFS I should have known 😂

Oh look

Incels and pervs....there's a poem in there somewhere?

To me, my kids' age is a consideration only, not the final word. For example, regardless of age, my house/my rules applies, though I do apply it lightly because I like to be nice. In my opinion, trips work the same way. I assume you are paying. Therefore, she is a guest and it's your trip/your rules. Good luck with it.

Oh my mother Danielle
You made my life hell
I thought you had my heart
But you ripped it apart
You preferred the puss
My secret name is Oedipus

Any good?

You’re overly sexualising her, it’s a bit of bum she should be able to wear them it’s their and your problem if you’re bothered

Just ask her to kindly cover her bum when she’s walking amongst the elders and tell the old geezers to keep their eyes off of her. It’s really just a body and if it’s a good body, good for her. I wish I could wear that that but I think my 68 body would cause offense. lol. Yuck

I really can't see the issue. She's 19 and will be wearing the sane as the majority of other women on the beach.

Or she can wear what she wants and tell the elders to keep their eyes on all the other women and teens in their g-string bikinis if they want to perve.

I'm old and absolutely hate the look of thong bikinis. It's totally unnecessary to have your arse cheeks hanging out, it's a horrible look, not flattering to anyone. On the beach last summer with my grandchild who asked me "why are those girls wearing no bikini bottoms", when I looked a group of teenagers were playing with a beach ball with t shirts and thong bikinis on, literally did look like they have nothing on their bottom half.

I think with extended family thong bikinis are inappropriate. Your daughter needs to be more mature and realise that in certain circumstances certain clothing is appropriate. There are plenty of lovely bum-covering bikinis which would stop other family members feeling uncomfortable. I'm surprised she wants to wear one in front of extended family, is she a bit of a show off? Presumably she wouldn't go topless in front of them, so why does she want them to be able to see her bare buttocks?

I don't know where to begin with that one

You can't say it's not true 🤷🏼‍♀️

So if her older relatives had amazing gym-fit bodies, it would be more acceptable for the 19 year old woman to wear a skimpy bikini?

She is a grown woman, you're fortunate she is going away on holiday with you and the family. Trust me, she will not be the only one with a thong on the beach, young women everywhere wear them and have done so for years. They also go topless though that is becoming less common because of fears of breast cancer. I don't like thongs, they look so uncomfortable, but I accept them. I expect most of your family will too. I hope you have a lovely holiday.

I agree with this. She is 19, not 13, and I think she can wear what she wants within a private family pool setting, unless there are clear indications that should not do so. In public, it is a no. I had a similar discussion with my 19 yo daughter when we went to Italy, and she insisted on wearing a tiny top showing cleavage and midriff, then moaned because men were looking at her. It was a bit "if this, then that" for me. Wear what you want, but don't expect not to have a reaction, especially in a place where the culture is different. If you don't like the reaction, then you need to re-think your choices.