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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want 2YO having felt tip pens

114 replies

Cheesybroccoli · 13/03/2025 15:42

MIL gave my 2 year old DC a pack of felt tips, DH and I voiced that we were not happy about this, but she dismissed it because they’re washable. AIBU to take them away, or am I being a Scrooge?

For the record I have an amazing relationship with MIL, we just have very different attitudes to our homes, felt tip on her floor/walls/sofa wouldn’t be a big deal, but to me it is.

OP posts:
Devilsmommy · 13/03/2025 15:43

I've got a 2 year old and no chance would I let him have felt tip pens. Yanbu

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 13/03/2025 15:43

It comes off walls. My dd had loads of felt pens. They wash off.

Im with your mil.

Runningoutofthyme · 13/03/2025 15:44

Presumably as he’s 2 you’ll be supervising them when they are used and then putting them some where safe until you use them with him again… so there is minimal chance of him rampaging around the house on a graffiti spree

polinkhausive · 13/03/2025 15:44

Surely there's a middle ground here where you let your DD use them when supervised?

My kids have always had paints and felt tips and markers and things but kept out of reach except when we supervised them to use them

Caspianberg · 13/03/2025 15:44

It’s fine. But I wouldn’t let a 2 year old have free access to them, that’s different. But sat at table with adult and paper, fine. It’s good for practice mark making with different types of things

Redpeach · 13/03/2025 15:44

Why not?

MammaTill2Pojkar · 13/03/2025 15:44

Suggest she gets her colour wonder pens and paper instead, the pens only work on the special paper.

couchparsnip · 13/03/2025 15:45

If they are the washable ones I would have no issue with it. MIL sounds lovely and you're being a bit precious about your house. They wash off!

minnienono · 13/03/2025 15:46

They are fine as long as supervised. Surely at 2 you don’t allow any art supplies unsupervised anyway?

ItGhoul · 13/03/2025 15:46

Unless you're planning to hand them to your 2-year-old and then leave the room to let them get on with it, I don't see why this is a problem. Just make sure they're something they only draw/play with when you're with them. Give them a few massive sheets of paper, draw a few bits with them and then let them have a good scribble until they're bored. Then put the felt tips away until next time.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 13/03/2025 15:46

Runningoutofthyme · 13/03/2025 15:44

Presumably as he’s 2 you’ll be supervising them when they are used and then putting them some where safe until you use them with him again… so there is minimal chance of him rampaging around the house on a graffiti spree

My dd went in a graffiti spree😞

l went to empty the dishwasher and she scribbled all over a wall. It came off though.

KeyWorker · 13/03/2025 15:47

Surely you can just teach your child not to draw on the walls or furniture. Can you not keep them as a supervised activity for now, so they use them only when you sit down together to colour and put them away when DC is less supervised. You can get a wipe clean table covering for the table too that can also be used for Play-Doh/ glue/ paint etc.

CurbsideProphet · 13/03/2025 15:47

No felt tips allowed here, our 2 year old has used a crayon to scribble on a door and there's no way I'm risking a felt tip! He didn't do it deliberately, he just had that 2 year old thought process of "oh that looks like a nice big door to scribble on".
Why would your MIL be so bothered about it? They can be played with at her house if that's what she wants!

feelingrobbed · 13/03/2025 15:51

My kid did this once. A tiny little line. I told her I’d throw them all in the bin if she did it again. Never happened again. Well hope not as she’s five now. Boundaries.

Gardenyear · 13/03/2025 15:55

I'd say fine under close supervision - when you're sat at the table colouring with her. Special occasion pens.

I certainly wouldn't fall out with MIL by declaring them banned, but I definitely wouldn't give DD free access to them either.

Needanewnameidea · 13/03/2025 15:59

I didn’t mind felt tips because all drawing equipment (including pens, crayons and pencils) was put away where kids couldn’t reach anyway. I’d get it down, we’d use it together at the table, it’d go back away again. I don’t think felt tips are an ideal thing for toddlers because they tend to overuse them, make the paper wet and make holes, but one pack won’t do any harm.

BrownieBlondie01 · 13/03/2025 16:16

My 2yo has felt tips but, as others have said, we only use them together. I don't leave them accessible to her to use one her own because obviously she'd draw all over everything.

Lavender14 · 13/03/2025 16:19

My 2 yo has felt tip pens that he uses with supervision. I just sit and colour in with him and put some newspaper or old card under the page he's going to draw on and he knows he's supposed to try and stick to the paper. We practice one at a time and lids on after each use. Same applies to paint. Crayons and coloring pencils I would let him use more independently while still in the room watching him

I don't see why you'd think this was an unreasonable gift when you could use them together.

Lilaccrystal · 13/03/2025 16:21

Under supervision, absolutely fine no problem

Discombobble · 13/03/2025 16:21

If they’re washable they wash off. My granddaughter has some, and they do indeed wash off/out

zoemum2006 · 13/03/2025 16:22

It's a bit of a bug bear of mine when parents stress too much about children and art supplies. I honestly think kids learn so much from arts and crafts - I think it's a real shame when it's too restricted.

I mean I think it does wonders for their patience, perseverance, creativity, mark making. I think it encourages calm concentration too.

I'm not really directing this at you OP... just so many parents in my area who literally wouldn't let their kids play with crafts!

RedOnyx · 13/03/2025 16:23

Mine is 3 now but she had washable felt tips at 2. She gets them at the table for a specific activity then I put them away again out of her reach. Same as paints.She has drawn on the floor with crayon - she then had the crayons taken away for the rest of the day and had to help clean it up.

Autumn1990 · 13/03/2025 16:25

Mine had felt tip pens from quite young. Eldest never drew on anything, next one drew on everything with anything. I’ve given up worrying

BarnacleBeasley · 13/03/2025 16:25

Admittedly my DS has come a bit later to drawing than some of his friends, but at 2 he wouldn't have been very good with felt tips anyway - a bit too much whole-fist scribbling and the tips would have been bashed in within about 5 minutes. At his nursery they had crayons and paints in the 2-3 room and I didn't see them using felt tips till we moved into the 3-5s. As PPs have said, though - scribbling on the walls is less of a risk if you're supervising. My DS drew on a door with crayons ONE time and after that he knew that you're not allowed to do that!

Sugargliderwombat · 13/03/2025 16:26

I'm baffled either way here. Either you don't allow supervised art or you would consider giving your child free reign with felt tips? Surely you just do craft while they're with you?