Friend not doing an evening meal as “we had a big meal earlier”

[Bupo]

So I’m staying with a friend who invited me to stay. She lives in a nice town that many tourists visit.

This evening I asked if there was any meal prep i could help with for dinner. And friend said something along the lines of “oh I assumed you wouldn’t want dinner as we had a massive meal earlier”.

She’s not wrong. We went to KFC as a few of the restaurants we tried were too busy. It’s literally been years since I last went. I had a burger and two chicken wings. The chips were raw so I only ate a couple.

It’s not the lightest meal but surely most would still expect to eat/feed a guest. She’s not weird with food and a normal not-big-not-small size.

I had about 4 tablespoons of leftover rice and curry for breakfast.

I’m about to go on a “walk” to coop

I also think friend is either fed up of people staying in her tourist town for free or is on MJ! I'd offer to get some things in for breakfast/brunch for the both of you OP.

Jeez these responses. It’s rude to host and not check with your guest about evening food plans. It is rude period. Tired of hosting?? Hey bupo I’m not up for cooking what sounds good to you?? On ozempic and not eating…hey bupo I’m not hungry but I’m happy to help you sort some dinner Bullshit no veg/ no fruit KFC is a massive lunch? Hey bupo I’m kinda done eating for the day but I’m happy to help you sort some dinner. Like to drink your calories as evidenced by 1/2 bottle of wine…hey bupo are you hungry? What do you think we can make/ buy easily. Such a low hosting bar….clean bed food available is the absolute minimum of any host. Get yourself some dinner bupo

Kentucky fried sparrow ......

My in-laws did this to my kids when they stayed with them for a week!! My son is always hungry anyway, my daughter doesn’t overeat so would eat less than eveyone else, and they just didn’t bother with dinner!!!

🙄

That is irresponsible (grand)parenting. If you’re not going to feed kids don’t have them over.

One fast food burger and a couple wings is a fair enough lunch, but seven hours later I'd probably fancy something quite different.
Maybe even just a nice deli plate with ham, cheese, sun-dried tomatoes, olives, carrot and cucumber sticks and a couple dips? Or an omelette with salad? Even just soup and nice bread..
Junk food can be bloating but I wouldn't say it was so filling you'd not need anything at all for the rest of the night. Good call going to get supplies!

But you shouldn’t expect your guest to share your petite appetite.

A little voice in my head is telling me she is doing weight loss jabs and for her, KFC is enough

Blimey, just reading that has me craving fruit and veg 😂

Oh no that's not on. I'm forever offering guests stuff, nobody goes hungry here. Would be horrified if anyone was hungry or thirsty and I always show people where stuff is to help themselves as well
I even made bacon barms for the workmen digging up the road outside the kitchen window

'Having Salad That' 😂

If I had eaten a lot at lunch and wasn't hungry later, fine.However I'd make sure a guest wasn't hungry too! I'd probably say I wasn't going to eat anything that evening as I was still full but what do they fancy, anything? I've got soup/salad bits/bread/leftover whatever'. I'd certainly not assume someone else didn't want to eat at a 'normal' time, just because I didn't!

If you're hosting, you look after people's needs to an extent.

Some people cannot escape their own frame of reference. I was on holiday with someone once for example, who when I went for a swim, asked if I was okay to swim 'after our heavy meal'.

I'd eaten soup and a roll, not finished it, and a couple of olives. She'd had soup, a roll, sides and other bits that I wouldn't eat (I don't eat meat) and a pudding. Because she'd eaten a substantial amount, it wouldn't have ever occurred to her that I hadn't. It sounds as if OP's friend thought similar here.

YANBU
The point of hosting is to enjoy your friend's company and make sure they have everything they need. It's basic kindness imo
Personally I only ever eat once a day but if I had a friend staying of course I'd make them some dinner. Even if it was crackers and cheese because they weren't hungry enough for a full meal.

Its bad manners, but not uncommon. I worked hard to get a weekend free from DC etc to visit a friend a 2 1/2 hour drive away. I asked what we were doing as I'd seen X and Y walks nearby and got 'nope, this is your chill time, we're watching tv'. We did go out to a fancy bar she wanted to go to that evening, but still ended up back at hers, at home, with a take away, by 8pm, watching old movies. Next morning we went to a market she wanted to go to, coffee only, then home by 9am. To watch more old movies that she chose. Lunch didn't happen as she's a tiny eater who fills up on coffee.

It was such a disappointment I didn't make the effort to visit again. She knew I was SAHM and desperate to get out & do things. She DOES want visitors as she's single & loves company. She's happy to go as places as long as she's interested. I find that's normal now.

As for food, I've learned to carry some high protein snacks that I can slink off & eat.

She might be on weight loss injections? It totally changes the way you think about food. That or I’d assume she has money problems. Either way today plan and cater for yourself. Make sure you contribute to all expenses, and try not to take it personally.

And no I would never not offer all three mrskd hk guests!

People eat leftover curry for breakfast?!! 😰

Hadn't considered the weight loss jabs point but yes if she eats this type of crap, Indian food at brekkie, topped up with a side of burger for lunch then she does sound like someone who is probably on these weight loss injections for an easy ride. Hope you got some good proper food in, I'd be wanting my own bed and home asap

It sounds miserable! Either way.
Op I hope you are not reheating rice 12 hours later?! You are likely to have bigger problems than merely sourcing food if you are!! 😬

Yep this is Mounjaro behaviour op

It's so awkward. Staying at my parents' is a bit like this. They're older so don't eat as much and have no idea about other people's appetites. Once I was BFing and was absolutely starving. Or my 1yo would get like a spoonful of food when he actually ate heaps so my DH and I would have to top him up with 1/2 our meals. My siblings and I now know to turn up with food which slightly offends our parents but we have to eat!

That's awful and the opposite of good hosting.

Was she regifting stuff she had stockpiled from Christmas?

Order a takeaway