Can my family take me to court to see my children

[godfreyfour]

I have a very toxic mum and sister who I cut contact with many years ago.
I've since married and had 3 children 1, 5 and 7 who have never met them or heard anything about them we and don't live in the area.
We have dh family and the children have loving grandparents/cousins and extended family on his side.

I've always been very discrete on social media blocking anyone I didn't want to see me and keeping profiles private but it appears to have got back to them and that I have children, they've contacted me through a third party to insist I allow them to meet my children which I've declined and now the message relayed to me is that they'll see me in court because I'm preventing them from meeting grandchildren children/niece/nephews which they think they have a right to.

Are they likely to be able to have contact with my children who are completely unaware of these people and without me as I don't want any contact with them?
I really don't want to have to spend a fortune on legal fees just to keep life as it is.

Short answer is no. You would be best to post in legal for detailed advice.

Absolutely not. They don’t have a relationship with them. Don’t even worry about it

They can take you to court for any reason they fancy but they've not got a chance in hell of winning.

The only one I have heard of when a grandparent were given access through the court was when the child’s mother had sadly died and the father was refusing contact. The grandparents had a relationship with the child beforehand. I doubt it’s likely when there is no relationship between the child.

I really hope they can't, I feel quite blindsided by this as it's been over 10 years since we've had contact and as far as I was concerned that was the end of it.

This might be useful:

https://www.elitelawsolicitors.co.uk/rights-of-grandparents/

They would need to seek permission for a Child Arrangements Order from the court before being able to pursue this further. With absolutely no contact and a long term estrangement, and no attempt at mediation, they are likely to be refused permission.

They have the right to take you to court, but the judge will very probably throw it out.

Let them waste their money.

EDIT - I suspect they are hoping threats and emotional blackmail will force you to comply though.

The only time I’ve heard of access being granted to grandparents was when bil (who’s a waste of space) broke up with his girlfriend and she wouldn’t let the family see the kids. Bil didn’t even bother trying to see them. The thing is though that mil had a great relationship with them, did all the school runs to help out, and baby sat them to the point where she could possibly have had them even more than their parents did. So my in laws took her to court and won. The thing is though after all that, she completely ignored the court order and nothing was done about it. Even with a court order, no judge is going to put a child’s mum in prison for not letting them see their nan

They have absolutely no legal right to see your children. The fact that they would even try to do this is proof of how right you were to cut contact with them.
It might be helpful to send a solicitor's letter to them, telling them that you do not wish to have any contact with them and to leave you, and your family alone.
You could also tell the "third party" that you don't wish to have any messages conveyed through them.

I have seen threads on MN in the past about this kind of thing and I’ve seen the advice given by people who understand the law.

The advice has always been that in your situation they have absolutely no chance of winning such a court case.

take satisfaction in knowing they will be spending a lot of money with zero chance of getting somewhere.

If they continue to contact you I would consider reporting them to the police for harassment

They don’t have any legal right to see your children and will be told this if they get legal advice. Just ignore, it’s very unlikely they’ll take you to court. If they’re anything like my family they’re just trying to cause drama. Hopefully they’ll get bored if they don’t get the desired effect.

Well, they could BUT with what you have posted they would get nowhere fast and they would be left with the bill. Now @godfreyfour stop thinking about this, and as a perfect revenge continue to live your happiest life with your children. This no longer lives in your head.

I would laugh and say good luck with that! Even if a fairyland judge granted it - good luck with getting any of us to go along with that.

Ignore!

Who is the 3rd party? I'd be telling them that you do not wish to receive any further messages from your family and would block them if necessary to prevent this.

Absolutely not a chance based on what you've said. If GPs for example had been looking after your child 2 days a week for the last 2 years then there is evidence of an establish and significant relationship so a court MAY award access. Your children OP have never met your mum or sister. I doubt the courts would even allow a case to start because there is zero evidence of a case in the first instance. They're bluffing and would be wasting piles of money even attempting it. Tell the flying monkey to sling it too. If anyone was to turn up on your doorstep, you could start going down the route of harassment.

They have no chance. They are trying to upset you. Block whoever it is and ignore.

Do not engage. Ignore. Do not respond in any way.

It’s only allowed in very unusual circumstances like your mum looked after your kids while you were in prison for a few years so the kids have an attachment to her.

Ignore and block the messenger.

Third party is an old friend, I say friend loosely as it's someone I grew up with who knows my sister as well and probably only knows the re-written version of why I won't allow her or mum meet the children.
I don't want to go into why I have no contact, not because I don't want to say but because I spent a lot of time on myself putting it behind me and have moved on and I just don't want to open up old wounds again now.

Tell the messenger very strongly to BACK OFF. It’s none of their business.

I wouldn't even reply. Just ignore and block. Even easier as not a close friend just an acquaintance from a long time ago so not losing anything.

ETA well done for putting it all behind you, can't have been easy. Don't let this set you back.

Block the "old friend" too, after telling them you didn't realise they would fulfil the role of "flying monkey" sent by the abuser. They can fk right off and join them in the cold world of NC

Blocked!

Google:
A flying monkey is a term used in psychology to describe someone who carries out the work of an abuser, such as a narcissist or sociopath. The term comes from The Wizard of Oz, where the Wicked Witch of the West uses flying monkeys.
How do flying monkeys act?
They may act as a courier between the abuser and their target
They may plead the abuser's case
They may spread rumors or gossip about the target
They may gaslight or manipulate the target
They may dismiss or trivialize the target's feelings
Who are flying monkeys?
They may be friends, family, or coworkers of the abuser
They may be loyal or subservient to the abuser
They may buy into the abuser's false personality
They may be too afraid of the abuser to stand up to them
Types of flying monkeys
Benevolent enabler: They tend to put the needs of others ahead of their own
Malevolent enabler: They knowingly participate in narcissistic abuse

Do not answer any questions from them or pass any messages through a third party. Completely ignore whatever they are saying. They are just doing it to get a reaction. They cannot get access to your kids and a solicitor will laugh at them.

Its only not going to be the end of it if you reply.